


Asmodeus’s Gift

by Sandylee007



Series: Asmodeus's Gift [1]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, Drama, Family, Love, M/M, Miscarriage, Mpreg, Pregnant Magnus Bane, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-12
Updated: 2019-05-06
Packaged: 2019-11-16 09:12:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 39,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18091544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sandylee007/pseuds/Sandylee007
Summary: What if Asmodeus also gave Magnus something when he took his son’s magic and immortality? After Iris’s attack Alec gets a shocking surprise.                            MALEC        MPREG                (timeline only partially canon compliant)





	1. Asmodeus's Gift

**Author's Note:**

> This idea WANTED to come out today. After resisting and stalling for a few hours, on the verge of coming out. (rolls eyes) We’ll see just what I came up with this time…
> 
> DISCLAIMER: Hah! If I owned anything, the show would be called ‘Magnus (or Malec) and co’.
> 
> WARNINGS: MPREG, weirdness, a little bit of naughty language… Thaaaaat’s it. Uh… Anyone out there…?
> 
> THE TIMELINE IS ALTERED SLIGHTLY FROM THE ACTUAL EPISODES 3x10, 3x11 and 3x12. BECAUSE… PLOT. (grins)
> 
> Awkay, I’m a bit nervous about posting this. So I’ll just get to it. I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride!

The second Magnus refused to rule Edom by Asmodeus’s side he saw a much too familiar flash in the Greater Demon’s eyes. Even when he was just a boy that look always meant bad news, promised a horrible punishment. And it didn’t disappear even after Magnus gave up his magic and immortality. As though those weren’t big enough sacrifices…!

Knowing that it was for the best to leave while he still could, while he still had even a shred of himself left, Magnus moved to do just that. Until Asmodeus’s voice froze him. “Oh, no, son. You are not leaving that easily.”

Magnus whirled around and sneered. “Easily? What else could I possibly have to offer you?”

“A gift of penance for how you disrespected me after all the years I spent raising and educating you.” Asmodeus sniffed and lifted his chin. “You have been avoiding me for centuries. And just now you practically spat at the throne I offered you. You contemn your original home and your father, as though we would be somehow beneath you. For so long I nurtured you, considered you my favorite offspring. And this is how you treat me? Choosing a Shadowhunter for a mate was a disgrace.” The Demon gritted his teeth. Then shrugged carelessly, ever fickle. “No matter. Perhaps you can still be of some use for your father’s house, after all.” Cat eyes that were chillingly similar to his own flashed. “One way or another I will have someone of my flesh ruling Edom with me. That is the least you can give me after everything I’ve done for you.”

Magnus didn’t get the chance to offer a witty remark that would’ve only gotten him into a deeper trouble. Nor did he have the time to ask anything. Asmodeus snapped his fingers, and the kind of magic the warlock had never seen before appeared.

Soon Magnus’s scream echoed through hell.

He couldn’t focus enough to hear Asmodeus’s words. “Angelic and demonic blood joined together… If it actually survives… And if you survive… This may lead to something fascinating.”

/

Magnus was in so much pain that he wasn’t entirely sure how he made it back. He was barely able to walk from the agony. Until he saw Alec on the ground, with an arrow sticking from his chest. And in a matter of seconds his mind was so overwhelmed that he forgot all physical discomfort. How was he supposed to remember Asmodeus’s final cruel trick when there was so much other pain?

Seeing Alec injured and being unable to do pretty much anything to help… Not feeling his magic anymore… Learning that Clary was dead… He blamed the ache coursing everywhere in his body, mainly in his stomach, on those bitter losses. He continued to blame those awful things, having his heart and soul shredded, when stomach cramps and nausea became his constant companions over the following four weeks. 

When one has lost too much, it becomes impossible to notice that something has been gained…

/

Then, shortly before five full weeks would’ve passed, Iris kidnapped Magnus.

Magnus fought back with all the infuriatingly limited reserves he still had. He managed to stall Iris until his rescue, which was a blow his pride would likely never recover from. (He was supposed to be able to look after himself!)

Then Iris’s attack landed on his stomach and he couldn’t ignore the physical pain anymore.

It was a miracle that he managed to pull himself up. He swayed horribly, even as he lunged towards the woman who tortured him and tried to take Madzie away. But that was where his strength ran out.

When Alec’s gentle, protective arm appeared to support him the agony exploded. Magnus gasped, too choked and overwhelmed to produce the howl he would’ve wanted to squeeze out. A shudder crossed his whole being, which made the discomfort even worse.

“Magnus?”

He wanted to answer. Tried to reassure Alec that he’d be fine, that he just had to breathe through it. But then he slumped, and consciousness fled seconds later.

“MAGNUS!”

/

Catarina herded Alec out of Magnus’s bedroom that’d become theirs. Gently but firmly she announced that she wouldn’t be able to focus with him breathing down her neck. Despite sheer terror driving him mad the Shadowhunter was somehow coherent enough to realize that he had to do what was best for his beloved.

Alec sent curt responses to the flood of messages from Izzy and Jace. Once he’d told his siblings the frustratingly little he knew he switched off his phone because the noise it made was too much on his fried nerves. After that he paced. Paced, and then some more. Over the span of two hours he berated himself a couple of hundred times over taking Magnus along.

This was his fault, Alec mused sullenly, his heart heavy. Hadn’t he sworn to never, ever let Magnus risk himself after his boyfriend’s return from Edom? Hadn’t he sworn to do everything in his power to protect the man he loved, who’d sacrificed so much for him and his family? Yet here they were.

When Catarina finally emerged from the bedroom it did little to soothe him. The look on her face sent chills down Alec’s spine. “How is he?” the archer demanded, hating how vulnerable he sounded. “Is he… Is he okay?” What was going on? Was the injury worse than they’d expected? What if…?

Catarina sighed heavily. “Magnus will be okay. He should wake up soon but he’ll still need plenty of rest after that.” (They both knew how much the magicless warlock would hate that.) She took a deep breath. “I… have no idea how to explain this to you, because I can barely wrap my head around it. It… sure as hell shouldn’t be possible. But…” Uncertainty, worry, shock and grief were all visible in her eyes. “For the first hour or so I felt three heartbeats when I examined Magnus. His own, and two others, smaller but much faster ones. Then one of the smaller heartbeats disappeared.”

Alec was paralyzed from shock. And although he still couldn’t quite comprehend what Catarina just said sorrow struck his heart like a knife. “What?”


	2. The Definition of Impossible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus do their best to deal with the life altering news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MY… DEAR… GOSH! When I posted the first little chapter, I expected no one to read it. You guys have me TOTALLY floored!
> 
> THANK YOU, a million times, for all your ABSOLUTELY AMAZING comments, kudoses and love! (HUUUUUGS) They’re what transformed his story, which ambushed me, into a chapter fic. I REALLY hope that what’s to come pleases you and turns out worth your expectations!
> 
> Okay. Let’s rock! I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride.

Alec’s mind was completely overwhelmed by far too much information.

Magnus was… There’d been two… And now…

The loss hit like a sledgehammer and made him feel sick.

If only he’d known…! Taking Magnus along to the search for Iris had been a big enough mistake. Worse was knowing that there were three precious lives to protect. And now, because of his bad call and a deranged woman, only two remained.

_Oh, Angel…!_

The second part of Catarina’s revelation finally slammed at him properly. There was still one baby. If he or she was strong and stubborn enough to make it through, he’d become a dad. And he absolutely wasn’t ready for it. He was terrified.

“You seriously need to start breathing or I’ll have to result to a spell to calm you down.”

Alec swallowed. Once, twice, thrice. Surprised that he didn’t end up throwing up. “It’s impossible”, he sputtered. For some reason his mind, which was in a state of chaos, chose to anchor on that thought. “Magnus… He’s said that he can’t father children. No warlock can have children. It’s not…” He trailed off, recognizing how ridiculous he sounded.

Catarina gave him a wry smile. “You two are the definition of impossible things happening. This shouldn’t even surprise me.” She then sobered. “But honestly? I’ve been wondering how this happened, too. And I have a good guess.”

Alec’s eyes darkened. His blood boiled when he managed to reach the same conclusion. “Asmodeus.” Why would the Greater Demon pull off a stunt like this?

Catarina gave him a while to think and then overthink. “Alec… Whatever comes next, this won’t be easy.” She studied his face carefully. “If you feel like this is too much…”

Alec narrowed his eyes, insulted. “I’m not turning my back on the man I love when he needs me the most!” he snapped. “Or on my child.” It felt beyond surreal to utter the final bit. But he meant what he said. Scared as he was, there was absolutely no force in the whole world that’d keep him away from Magnus and the baby the warlock still carried.

His response seemed to please Catarina, if the smile appearing to her face was any indication. It seemed like he’d passed some sort of a test. “I’m glad to hear you think so. In that case congratulations are in order.”

Alec smiled, faintly and briefly. Until a new thought had him shaken. “Magnus… He’ll be okay, right?” He didn’t dare to wonder how his boyfriend would take all this on an emotional level. Losing his magic and immortality, then one of the twins, and finding out that there was still one little one inside him… Focusing on the physical aspect was also terrifying but perhaps bearable.

The look on Catarina’s face gave him chills. “I’m not going to start lying.” She sighed heavily. “This is going to be… risky. Regardless of what Asmodeus did to him, his body isn’t equipped for handling a pregnancy, let alone childbirth. I… have no idea what sort of complications there may be, or how far along he can get before it’s too much. Especially when he doesn’t have the help of his magic.” Her shoulders slumped from frustration. “I’m sorry that I can’t give you the kind of an answer you would’ve wanted. But there are more unknown variables than I can count. We’ll just have to try and navigate through them.”

Alec simply nodded, in too much of a shock for anything verbal, and his gaze fell to the floor.

Once again Catarina allowed him to process before continuing gently. “Magnus will probably wake up any moment now. I can… tell him, if you want me to.”

Alec would’ve lied in claiming that taking the easy way out wasn’t tempting. But he steeled himself resolutely. “Thanks, but… I’ll do it.” Even if he had no idea how to break the news to his beloved, who’d already had far too much to cope with.

He moved to head towards the bedroom when Catarina stopped him. “Alec, wait.” He wasn’t sure which one was a bigger surprise. Her embrace, or how he practically melted to it. (After a day of one shock after another, he seriously needed a hug.) “I’m so sorry, about the other baby.”

For the second time in a matter of minutes Alec nodded. Not trusting his voice. He refused to wonder why his eyes felt moist and stung hellishly.

He was sorry, too.

/

Catarina announced that she’d spend the night at the guest room, just in case, and would retreat there for some much-needed rest soon. But as he slipped into the bedroom after gathering courage for several minutes Alec could tell that she lingered in the kitchen. Keeping watch, ready in case she’d be needed but giving the couple some privacy to deal with the earth-shattering news. It made him appreciate her even more than he already had. Then Alec saw his boyfriend and couldn’t think about anything else.

Magnus lay curled up on the bed, a frown on his face even as he slept. One of the man’s hands was pressed against his abdomen. It looked like he already felt that something was missing and tried to protect what was still left. It broke the Shadowhunter’s heart.

For a few long moments Alec remained frozen still. Then pushed himself to motion determinedly. Mindful to not cause more discomfort, he sat on the bed’s edge and caressed his lover’s face with a tender hand. Magnus leaned to the touch instinctively and it did funny things to the archer’s aching heart.

Alec’s gaze strayed towards the older man’s stomach. Ridiculously paranoid that he might bring further harm, he reached out his free hand and lay it right beside Magnus’s protective one. Of course it was far too early to feel the life growing inside. But it didn’t erase the knowledge that the spark was there. Hiding behind abdominal muscles that still felt painfully tense from the merciless blow they received from Iris.

Alec was so transfixed that he jumped from startle when Magnus’s hand was laid on top of his. Turning his head, he found a pair of hazy, half-open eyes looking back at him. He tried to smile but had a feeling that it didn’t come out right. “Hey”, he greeted softly. “How are you feeling? Any pain anywhere?” He was restless and anxious. His protective instincts were going haywire now that he knew how much there was to lose and how much had already been lost. And, if he was brutally honest with himself, he wanted to stall the news, just a little while longer.

Magnus’s eyes softened at his concern. “I’m perfectly fine, just a little sore.” Which most likely scored five or six on an average person’s zero to ten pain-scale. Suddenly fidgety, the man looked around. The warlock’s whole body sagged slightly from relief when he recognized his surroundings.

Alec squeezed his boyfriend’s hand comfortingly, needing the contact as much for himself. “You’re safe, now. And you’ll be okay.” Which one of them was he trying to convince? “Catarina healed you.”

It was visible for little more than a blink of an eye, but Alec was just fast enough to catch it. Magnus grimaced, appearing humiliated. (It took longer than it should’ve to click. When Magnus once announced that he could take care of himself, Alec hadn’t quite comprehended just how long the man had been looking after himself. And a huge amount of others. The warlock wasn’t used to others coming to rescue and heal him.) The Shadowhunter was about to offer reassuring words when the older man’s eyes met his. In an instant Magnus’s body grew practically rigid.

Magnus spoke up before the younger man could ask, eyes full of concern. “You’ve been crying.” (Had he been? Alec hadn’t even noticed.) “What’s wrong?”

So much for stalling, then…

/

Magnus listened, unable to utter a word.

Because of his father’s fickle antics he was pregnant. In fact, there were two babies inside him. Until Iris came along.

And here he’d imagined that he felt like a failure after being unable to protect Madzie and getting himself kidnapped…

All the losses and life-altering changes that’d been hurled his way caught up with Magnus, struck him like no physical attack could. Too much. All of it.

“Magnus?” Alec sounded scared, sad and desperate. Needed someone to tell him how to fix things.

Magnus swallowed thickly. He wasn’t entirely sure if he was going to vomit or burst into tears. And he didn’t feel like doing either in front of even Alec. Not when his dignity had already suffered far too many blows in one day. “Can you… give me a moment?” He was audibly begging and hated it. “Just… Ten minutes.” He could immediately see that Alec needed more beckoning to be coaxed from his side. “I could use a glass of water.”

Alec nodded slowly, like a soldier who’d received his orders. Then kissed him, so swiftly and spontaneously that it caught them both by surprise. “I love you.”

Magnus felt something inside him thud. “I love you, too.” And that, was something which hadn’t changed in the hurricane of chaos that’d swept through both their lives recently.

With a closed bedroom door separating them, they reacted to the pain and shock ravishing them almost identically. While Magnus pressed a hand against his still throbbing abdomen Alec leaned one hands against the wood between them. Then both men stuffed a fist into their mouth to muffle a scream, and let the tears roll. Next, after the wave of grief, came determination.

They lost one of their babies. But they still had a little one and each other to protect. Their child, theirs to cherish. (Even if parenthood was forced on them with magic before they’d decided whether they wanted to give it a try or not.) They both vowed to give their all to not fail again.

/

Two hours later they sat on the bathroom floor. Magnus sighed in relief while the last of the nausea faded away and the water Alec got him washed away the horrid taste. The Shadowhunter rubbed soothing circles on his back, eager to do what little he could to help. “Is there anything else I can do? I could ask Catarina…”

Magnus, however, shook his head. “No need”, he assured. He leaned his head against the other’s strong, steady shoulder and closed his eyes with a contended sigh. “Right now, I just need this.”

Alec smiled. Small as it was, the gesture was genuine. Not needing to say a word, he kissed Magnus’s spiked hair, then proceeded to fiddle the strands with his fingers. Which earned a purr-like noise the younger man had long since decided he adored.

And right there, after the endless day that turned their lives upside down permanently, they were each other’s best comfort.

/

Under the prison’s torture Iris screamed. Howled from sheer agony. “Stop!” she pleaded desperately. “Stop! I… I have information… Stop…!”

“What could you possibly offer us, Downworlder?” a woman’s voice hissed.

Iris swallowed convulsively. Memories of Madzie brought a bitter taste to her mouth. So she spat out the poison. “I… don’t know how it’s possible… I swear I don’t. But, Magnus Bane… When I had him… I felt two babies inside him. Such… with Nephilim blood… along with his own.”

The torture came to a swift end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So… Yeah. You thought Iris was done being the biggest capital-B ever? You thought wrong. And poor Malec! Especially Magnus. How in the world is he going to handle everything he’s going through? Look after THEM, Alec!
> 
> Soooo… Was that any good at all? Would you like some more? Anyone out there who wants to put together an Iris-hate-club with me? PLEASE, do let me hear from you! Every comment makes my heart sing!
> 
> Until next time! I REALLY hope that I’ll see you all there.
> 
> Take care!


	3. In Need of a Break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s an emotional roller-coaster while Alec and Magnus try to take in everything that’s going on. Especially approaching parenthood. They receive some much-needed emotional support from each other, friends and family. In the meantime a threat lurks closer…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess what? It’s time to update! (BEAMS) 
> 
> My… gosh! To quote my FAVORITE warlock… You continue to surprise me! SERIOUSLY, all those comments and kudoses…! You guys are AMAZING. (HUUUUUGS) I REALLY hope that what’s to come won’t be a letdown, either.
> 
> Okay… Ready or not, it’s time to continue with the story. But, before getting to the chapter, I need to point out something…
> 
> TO AVOID CONFUSION: I CHANGED THE ORDER OF SOME THINGS FROM THE CANON. In this story Clary returned BEFORE Iris attacked. (Because Jonathan holding her hostage for five weeks…? Yeah, nope.)

Upon waking up Magnus couldn’t remember much of anything since the bathroom. Mildly appalled, he wondered if he actually fell asleep there. Once more in the comfort of his own safe, familiar bed he yawned and stretched like a big cat trying to wake up. Then tensed up, his eyes widening a fraction.

He smelled something burned.

One of his hands went to his stomach in a subconscious protective gesture while he sat up faster than his head would’ve allowed. “Alec?” Receiving no response, he glanced towards the other side of the bed and found it empty. Which made his tension escalate.

It was worse than he’d feared.

Ignoring how lightheaded moving so fast made him, Magnus fought his way out of the bed and hurried towards the kitchen. He froze by the doorway and bit back a groan. Along with several far from civilized words in a wide variety of languages.

He’d been too late to prevent the disaster.

Alec was preparing what was most likely supposed to be a breakfast. It was hard to tell what, exactly, the menu would’ve consisted of because only charred remains were left. Magnus watched fondly how his boyfriend muttered heatedly to himself, then looked around the room and finally did groan. If only he had his magic to clean up the kitchen…

Before he could explore the grief that thought provoked too thoroughly Alec noticed him. The younger man appeared vaguely mortified. “I was supposed to bring you breakfast to bed.”

The Shadowhunter sounded so miserable that Magnus felt a sudden urge to kiss him. Until the need to do something else won. It must’ve been the smell of burned eggs, grease and bacon that sent his entire abdominal area to a series of somersaults. As quickly and gracefully as he could Magnus spun around and dashed to the bathroom.

It took forever before he’d finally made peace with his stomach. Which shouldn’t have had anything in it to empty. Breathing deep and evenly through his nose, as though in the middle of a yoga session, he sensed a familiar presence.

“I, ah… aired the apartment. And threw away the burned food.” Alec’s face was the picture of desolation. “So the baby already hates my cooking?” (He said the b-word as though testing it. It seemed they were both still working on getting used to the idea.)

Magnus huffed. “Alexander, while I appreciate your gesture… You’re immensely gifted at great many things. But why don’t we agree that you will leave the kitchen alone?” He tapped at his for the time being flat belly. “Majority vote. Two against one.”

Alec rolled his eyes. But the beginning of a smile tickled one corner of the archer’s lips. “Stop conspiring against me, you two.” The young man was quick to grow solemn again. “You’re… okay, right?”

Magnus took a deep breath and dropped his gaze to the floor. Something about Alec’s sincere care cracked him uncharacteristically open. “Physically? I’m fine. I fear this…” He grimaced at the horrid taste lingering in the room. “… particular problem will make great many repeat performances. Emotionally?” He shifted and clenched his jaw, hating the way his eyes stung for a few moments. “I’ll keep you posted.” He really, honestly didn’t want to talk about… any of it, although he knew that they should’ve, would have to eventually.

Partial miscarriage, or whatever what happened was supposed to be called… His lost magic… Iris’s torture… Becoming a dad before he got the chance to decide whether he wanted it… A pregnancy that might be more than his body could handle… Having a baby he was supposed to keep safe when he couldn’t even protect a child he babysat… The whole pile of horrible was so massive that it was absurd.

And he was roping his twenty-something boyfriend to the whole chaos.

“Hey.” A calloused but gentle hand lifted his chin until they were eye to eye. “Where did you go?”

Alec… didn’t seem to mind being roped to a boyfriend he knocked up accidentally. Hard as he looked, Magnus couldn’t find a trace of his beloved being fed up or searching a way out. (He’d been dumped by more than enough lovers to recognize all the even subtlest signs.) He saw a great deal of fear and uncertainty. But alongside those a baffling amount of love and even tentative, budding excitement.

Magnus had flashbacks of Alec with Madzie and Max. His boyfriend was created to be a dad. He could only wish that perhaps one day, by some miracle, he’d find a shred of hope that he might be a decent parent, too. It was hard to picture himself raising a small child with the role models he’d had. (A mother who hated what he was enough to kill herself, a father that was a fickle Greater Demon and a stepfather who despised him…)

It occurred to Magnus, at last, that he was expected to offer some sort of a verbal response. “Since you’re determined to give me breakfast… How about a jam-toast and orange juice?” He wasn’t hungry. But he supposed he had to eat something.

Alec seemed endearingly baffled. Clearly those words weren’t the answer that’d been expected. But then the archer nodded and smiled, visibly relieved to be able to do something. “I think even I can’t mess up that.” He received a kiss on the tip of his nose. “Now get to bed. I’ll be there with the food soon.”

“Because the kitchen is unusable?”

“Maybe.” Alec shrugged. And failed to appear as innocent as he tried to with how his eyes gleamed and how red his cheeks had become. “Or maybe I just… like seeing you in bed?” Slightly clumsy, perhaps. But a million steps ahead from the point where the archer beelined from a shared couch.

Magnus snorted. “Alexander Lightwood… To imagine that people have been led to believe that Shadowhunters are morally superior.”

Alec seemed amused, his confidence regained with the help of the gentle teasing. “I grew up with Jace and Izzy. It was bound to have an impact. And you’re terrible influence.”

True, that, Magnus acknowledged without shame.

Alec was about to leave. But came to think of something on the very last moment. “I know that you’re not ready to share what’s on your mind yet, but… When you are… I’m here.”

Magnus nodded, struck speechless. Once the young man was out of earshot he pulled his legs to his chest and pressed a hand against his stomach as tightly as he dared to. “See what you have waiting for you? He’s so ready for you, even if he doesn’t know it yet”, he whispered, careful to make it practically inaudible. His gaze was directed towards where Alec went. He leaned his chin on one knee and fought against the lump in his throat. “I’m… I’m trying. So don’t you two dare leave me, too.”

/

As much as Alec would’ve liked the lazy morning to continue, eventually duty came calling. The day was mostly filled with infuriating paperwork. Which left him with far too much time to think. And overthink. (People kept telling him that he was good at doing that, and it didn’t sound like a compliment.)

Eventually Izzy confronted him. “I can practically see the wheels turning in your head”, she announced. “If it’s something I can help with, spill.”

Alec was tempted to do just that. But he and Magnus agreed that they’d wait before sharing their secret with anyone. They needed to wrap their own heads around the whole thing before dealing with the, without a doubt, smothering amount of attention their news would arouse. “I’m just… thinking.”

“About Magnus.” It wasn’t a question. Izzy’s brows furrowed and a touching amount of worry appeared to her eyes. Sometimes Alec forgot that there were others who cared about his boyfriend, too. “Is he… okay?”

_No._ “Yeah. He’s just… coping and adjusting.” To the man’s whole life changing dramatically yet again. How many times could that happen to one person in such a short amount of time?

Izzy watched him thoughtfully. “You know what? Take tomorrow off.” One look was enough to cut his automatic protest. “You’re the head of this Institute. You’re also Alec Lightwood, a boyfriend. Stay at home with Magnus, pamper each other.” Her eyes softened. “I know how much your career means to you. But alongside that you have other things you value, now. And it’s okay.”

Alec would’ve argued if she wasn’t so right. Righter than she could possibly imagine, actually. And honestly? The idea of spending a whole day home, taking care of the man he loved and who carried his child, was too tempting to resist. (Even if he suspected that his fussing was going to drive Magnus insane.) He needed that, the knowledge that he still had those two to care for after one little heartbeat was lost.

“Are _you_ okay?” Izzy was frowning again. “You… looked sad when I walked in. And again just now.”

“I’m fine.” He started to sound like Magnus… “I just need a day off.” From life-altering surprises, attacks of psychotic evil people and fearing that he’d lose someone he loved. He’d appreciate a break from all that very much.

/

After her return home Clary was given a few weeks off. So she could recover and adjust, was the official reason, but she suspected that it was more because the Clave didn’t trust her. Most of the time she didn’t actually mind. She had a lot of catching up to do with everyone she loved, and after several endless weeks with Jonathan she did need some time to get used to being home. Especially with the unwanted bond between the two of them. Jonathan’s constant, painful attempts to reach out to her didn’t give her pretty much a moment to relax entirely. She didn’t think she’d breathe easily until he’d finally be captured.

That early afternoon, however, Clary pushed all those worries out of her mind. Since their boyfriends were busy with Shadowhunter duties, she and Magnus were left to deal with their tensions and busy heads by themselves. In the end they decided to try and unwind together.

It was a surprisingly warm, beautiful day. So they headed to their favorite park and chose a bench that opened a breathtaking view to a massive pond. Over the course of several hours they talked about everything and nothing, did their best to distract one another from the messes that were their lives. Eventually Clary felt a sting of alarm when she caught the way Magnus squinted and pinched the bridge of his nose absentmindedly. “Headache?”

Magnus waved off her concern in his typical manner. “Just a small one. Nothing to worry about.” To emphasize his statement he gave her a small smile. “Being here with you helps immensely, Biscuit.”

Hearing the soothingly familiar nickname, Clary finally found the will the utter something she’d meant to say since her return. (After finding out how much Magnus sacrificed to bring back the man who meant so much to her and Alec. Before the hurricane that was Iris almost…) “I feel better, too. I don’t know how you knew to invite me out today, but… I’m glad you did.” She smiled. “Thank you, for this. And everything else you keep doing, for all of us.”

Magnus appeared shocked by her gratitude. She wondered if it was sunlight or something else that made his eyes shine from moisture. “I appreciate that. But… You never have to thank me for trying to help those I care about.”

“I know I don’t." On the spur of the moment Clary shrugged, then leaned her head against his shoulder. It still felt safe, even if he didn’t have his magic. He was still Magnus Bane. "But I wanted to, because you deserve to hear it from time to time.”

Magnus couldn’t come up with anything to say to that. Instead he took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Oh, how happy I am that you came back. I missed you.” She pretended that she didn’t hear the emotions he fought to hold back, and he showed her the same courtesy.

“I missed you, too.”

In the middle of the sweet moment neither of them was aware of the eyes observing them keenly.

/

By the time Alec made it home Magnus was asleep, nose scrunched up and muttering something in his sleep. The archer’s eyes softened and his whole being filled with warmth at the sight. He made his way to the bed and lay down carefully. He wasn’t stealthy enough, because Magnus stirred with half-open, confused eyes. “Go back to sleep”, Alec urged. “I’m sorry I worked this late. But tomorrow I have a day off. Maybe I’ll surprise you with a breakfast in bed again.” At a look of vague horror he went on. “Just kidding. I wouldn’t do that to you again. When I wake up I’ll go and get some bagels from that coffee shop you like.”

“You’re lucky I love you”, Magnus scoffed with little venom.

Alec smiled and kissed the older man’s cheek. “Trust me, I know. I love you, too.” He chuckled when Magnus yawned. “Now sleep. You’re too adorable when you’re tired. I don’t know what I’ll do with my hands if you try to stay awake much longer.”

Magnus emitted something like a laugh and snuggled closer to him, as though attempting to merge them together. Alec was almost sure that he heard something like ‘not adorable’. The warlock was asleep again before the mumbled, incomprehensible sentence made it out properly.

Alec ensured that his boyfriend was resting comfortably. Then reached out towards the bag he dropped to the floor before climbing to bed. After a brief search he pulled out something he purchased on the way home from work. It was a book on pregnancy and taking care of a baby.

While Magnus slept Alec studied. Bracing himself and daydreaming simultaneously. He didn’t notice that at some point one of his hands had strayed to rest on his boyfriend’s stomach.

/

Elsewhere several members of the Clave had a meeting no outsider was to know about. “How are we to proceed with this information Iris gave us?” one of them, a middle-aged man, inquired.

“I already have someone keeping watch. First we need to ensure that Bane actually is pregnant. We all know how much Rouse loves lying. What she said sounds impossible, but if it’s somehow true…” The woman’s eyes flashed. “Such a magnificent child might be just the subject we’ve been seeking.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The feels were real with this one…! Poor darlings, trying so hard to cope with everything. But it looks like Alec’s already activating his daddy-mode. (smiles) I hope you don’t mind me devoting some time to Magnus and Clary friendship. I felt like it was something they both needed, since they’ve gone through A LOT recently.
> 
> Okay, hands up. Who wants to just blow up the Clave? And Iris? (lifts both hands)
> 
> And, of course… Was that ANY good, at all? PLEASE, do let me hear from you! Every single comment and sign of support means the world to me.
> 
> IN THE NEXT ONE: News about the baby come out in a way no one would’ve wanted. In the meantime the Clave continues to sneak closer.
> 
> Until next time! I REALLY hope that I’ll see you all there.
> 
> Take care!


	4. Safe Hands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> News about the baby come out in a way no one would’ve wanted. In the meantime the Clave continues to sneak closer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yuuuup. It’s DEFINITELY updating time. (grins) First, though…
> 
> THANK YOU, a bazillion times, for the AMAZING comments, kudoses and bookmarkings! To those who have been sticking with this tale from the start… I’m SO FLATTERED AND HAPPY that I haven’t lost you all. Yet… (chuckles nervously) And those new to this turbulent tale, WELCOME! (HUGS) It means SO MUCH to me that you’ve all joined in.
> 
> Awkay, before I go all mushy… Let’s go! We’ll see what awaits in this newest chapter…

The next four weeks were a trial and error in finding which scents and flavors Magnus could handle without his stomach protesting. Far too often nausea prevented eating altogether. Headaches came in waves. Alec didn’t even notice them at first, because Magnus could be spectacular at hiding the things he didn’t feel like showing. But when he really paid attention he couldn’t be fooled anymore. The herbal mixtures the ailing warlock and Catarina put together helped with both problems only marginally. Through it all Alec felt infuriatingly useless. Especially after he caught a hint of Catarina’s worry.

One day, while Magnus headed to a warm shower that’d hopefully soothe his body, Catarina voiced her concerns. “His blood pressure is through the roof. And I don’t like how little fluids and food he manages to hold down.” She clenched her jaw. “This pregnancy is already a high-risk one without all the stress. I’d tell him to relax and take it easy, but…” She didn’t have to continue. Considering everything that was going on, everything Magnus had lost, unwinding was a bit of a challenge…

Alec fidgeted. Knowing that the man loved and their unborn child were at risk… Well, it didn’t exactly sit well with him. “Whatever I can do to help… Name it.”

Catarina smiled fondly. He wasn’t quite sure why. What did she see on his face that triggered such a reaction? “You know what? I think you’re already doing it.” Before he could ask she went on with a half grimace, half smirk. “Now… I think Magnus is trying to tell you something with how long he’s been in the shower. And this… is my cue to leave. Call me if either of you needs anything.”

For a few moments Alec was confused. Then, slowly but surely, realization dawned. After a hurried thank you he was rushing towards the bathroom, his pupils wide and certain parts of him unfortunately visibly excited. Catarina watched him go with a scoff. She was willing to bet good money that the young Shadowhunter was naked less than halfway through the journey. That thought was more than enough to make her portal away swiftly.

/

After a lot of water had been wasted in the best way imaginable, the two lovers lay lazily in their bed. Sated, happy and, best of all, relaxed. Magnus was immensely relieved to discover that the throbbing headache that’d plagued him for days had finally lessened to a barely decipherable echo. And then Alec came up with something that worked better than any potion he could’ve tried.

Incredibly gentle fingers reached through his damp hair, until they found his scalp, and began to massage. Alec started slowly, as though testing if he was allowed to touch him that way. (Silly, really, considering what they just did.) “I… got this idea when washing your hair.” The motions gained more confidence when Magnus relaxed to them with a deep, blissed sigh. “This seems to relax you. But you can tell me to s…”

“Don’t you dare even think about stopping”, Magnus mumbled immediately, barely comprehensible with how he was sinking to a state of nirvana.

Alec laughed. (Magnus had missed such a sound of carefree, genuine joy. There’d been far too much stress, tension and worrying ever since Lilith showed up.) “Your wish is my command.” It turned out the kisses peppered among the massage only intensified the calming impact.

Perhaps the relief was fleeting. There were still far too many potential disasters looming in the horizon and an unpleasant amount of enemies hiding in the shadows. (His own father was definitely close to the top of that list.) But for a little while Magnus forgot to worry, wasn’t on guard in case of something terrible happening.

He was in safe hands, and so was the little one inside him.

/

Alec wasn’t surprised when Magnus fell asleep fairly quickly. That was what he was aiming for, after all. He kissed his slumbering beloved’s forehead, thrilled to find that it didn’t have any wrinkles of discomfort. Then he reached out towards a drawer to pull out the book on pregnancy and taking care of a baby he’d been reading religiously since buying it. He stopped when he saw the item, surprised.

The book wasn’t on the spot where he left it. A closer inspection revealed that great many of the pages had obviously been flipped through and studied intently. Some of them were marked as a sign that Magnus would return to them later. A smile found its way to the archer’s face.

He definitely wasn’t the only one who was starting to look forward to greeting their miracle.

Caught by the moment, Alec brushed his boyfriend’s finally serene face with a tender hand. Mindful to not disturb the much-needed rest. “I love you”, he whispered, like it would’ve been some sort of a secret. He showed similar affection to the man’s bare stomach. “And you, too. So hang in there, both of you.”

Alec couldn’t remember much between that and falling asleep. He woke up to an empty bed and panicked momentarily. Until he smelled food.

Curious and famished, Alec followed the scent. To find Magnus in front of a kitchen counter, humming softly to quiet music. (What was that language? French?) The warlock met his surprise with a shrug and a smile that seemed genuine. “I woke up hungry, imagine that.” (Such actually had been a rare occurrence lately.) “And I realized that I’ve never made you those Belgian waffles I mentioned when you spent a night here for the first time.” The man motioned for him to come closer, and offered a fork-full. “I hope I didn’t over advertise them.”

Honestly? At the moment Alec would’ve eaten small stones without complaining. Eager to try, he allowed Magnus to fork-feed him a small taster. The symphony of flavors made him hum appreciatively.

Magnus’s eyes twinkled from mirth and perhaps some pride. “Good?”

Alec kissed the man he loved. _Perfect_ , he thought to himself. “I may need another bite before I can decide”, he announced against the other’s lips.

The music Magnus had been listening to kept playing and a woman’s voice sang something that sounded romantic while they kissed again.

/

Roughly a week later the couple was up to something far less romantic. Duty came tumbling on them in a landslide. Things such as Jonathan creeping closer and killed werewolves. Perhaps Magnus didn’t have his magic anymore. But he had a great deal of knowledge and contacts. Despite Alec’s obvious reluctance to include the man who’d been ill lately, they needed all the help they could get. And powers or not, the warlock refused to be sidelined when they had about a million disasters to sort out.

The couple was having a… talk when Jace entered the Institute’s library and he froze, not wanting to intrude on what was none of his business. He would’ve noticed Alec’s concern and apprehension even without their bond. Magnus met it with irritation and fondness. The two were definitely arguing about something. The cause wasn’t hard to guess, since Magnus looked sick and exhausted despite having claimed fiercely that he was perfectly alright. (Which Alec accepted with an unconvinced look, having heard the proclamation a million times too many.) But based on the quick, sweet kiss they exchanged this tiff was only a mild disagreement. Jace wondered how often those two had fought over their shared tendency to push themselves too hard.

Neither noticed Jace until Alec began to leave the room. The blond read the expression on his brother’s face easily and felt a pang of sympathy. Whatever had been going on with Magnus – aside the far too obvious – clearly had the archer shaken. “Izzy and Clary found something they want to show you”, Jace explained. Then, after making sure that Magnus wouldn’t notice, he nodded towards the warlock. “I’ll help him go through the books in the meantime.” They both knew what he really meant. (‘I’ll watch over him for you.’.)

The trust and relief on Alec’s face broke his heart. Especially when the memory of his own hands plunging an arrow to the archer’s chest was still too fresh. Some parts of Lilith’s chaos would never truly fade.

Magnus paused going through the mountain of books piled on a desk to give him a surprised look. “Hey. Is… everything okay?”

“I think I should ask you that.” Jace didn’t wait for an answer, mainly because he knew that he’d receive a lie or a half-truth. “Try to bear with Alec. He can be… intense when he gets protective over those he loves.”

It felt good to see a genuine smile, small as it was. “I’ve noticed”, Magnus snorted, tiredly but without heat. Then frowned. “But I have a feeling that there’s something else on your mind.” 

Jace shifted from discomfort. “I was hoping that I might be able to help. With the books, and… other things.” Considering that he’d gone through this talk in his head several times over, it was ridiculously hard to articulate now. “Your Magic… It was too big of a price for my freedom.” He wasn’t blind, he saw the grief such a deal left behind. He’d been avoiding Magnus so he didn’t have to see that saving him cost a large piece of Magnus’s very self. It was past time he stopped being a coward and addressed it. “And I won’t stop helping Alec look for ways to get it back. We’ll figure out something.” Wasn’t that the least he could do?

Magnus seemed achingly surprised to have someone willing to fight for him. “I appreciate that.” The man’s eyes softened. “For the record… I’d do all of it again. You’re important to Alec, and Biscuit. Ergo, you’re important to me.”

Jace smiled while the sincere declaration helped lift a fraction of the tension that’d been sitting on his shoulders. The relief lasted until Magnus hissed and frowned, a shudder crossing the older man’s whole being. He was quick to take a step closer to the warlock. “What’s wrong?” 

Magnus’s brows furrowed further. “I’m… not sure...” Another hiss of ache cut the sentence short.

Jace panicked. Really, honestly panicked. “Magnus?” The name failed to spark a whole lot of reaction. “I’ll help you sit down, okay?” It sounded like a logical thing to start with.

The uncharacteristically open fear and pain in Magnus’s eyes did little to soothe his nerves. The warlock’s lips opened. But instead of words a sharp, choked cry of pain escaped while the man practically doubled over. One hand grabbing the desk while the other clutched at a clearly badly hurting stomach.

Finally regaining his wits, Jace peered over his shoulder. “Alec, get back here, now!” He then turned back, a million questions spinning around in his head. Only to find Magnus starting to slump towards the floor while the man’s eyelids fluttered closed. He was barely fast enough to catch his parabatai’s boyfriend before there would’ve been a rough landing. “Magnus!”

/

Jace’s fear and worry hit Alec seconds before the blond called out to him. The echo was no match to what overcame him immediately after. “Magnus!”

Alec ran like there was a demon on his heels. His blood ran ice-cold when he saw Jace on the floor, cradling Magnus clumsily. (As though unsure where it was safe to touch without causing further discomfort.) “What happened?” he demanded while dropping himself to the floor with enough speed and force to bruise his knees.

Jace shook his head helplessly. “I… I don’t know.” It was easy to see how sorry his brother was to not have a better answer. “His stomach was hurting, and then he just collapsed.”

Alec was already terrified. It exploded to something ten times stronger when he noticed how unhealthily taut Magnus’s whole abdominal area was. Every muscle twitched subtly from immense strain.

It all looked horribly similar to just after Iris’s attack, when they lost… What if he’d lose both…? The Shadowhunter didn’t register how his eyes stung while his lower lip began to tremble.

_No, no, no…!_

With a delay Alec noticed that they were getting audience. Izzy and Clary rushed to the scene upon hearing the commotion. The redhead gasped when she saw Magnus. His sister found her voice after swallowing hard. “What happened?”

Izzy’s voice managed to clear Alec’s head marginally, even if he couldn’t produce an answer. Forcing his thoughts to settle, he finally realized how exposed they were. That just about anyone could walk by and see Magnus at his most vulnerable. The thought made he archer’s protective instincts flare.

“I’m taking him to my room.” It felt like the only safe enough location nearby. Full of determination and fear, Alec gathered what was practically his whole world to his arms and stood up. He wasn’t going to let anyone else touch Magnus. Well, almost anyone. “Call Catarina Loss.”

Jace frowned, understandably confused. “Alec, what’s going on here? Do you know what’s wrong with him?”

Alec finally felt the tears in his eyes. Under any other circumstances it might’ve made him feel humiliated. This absolutely wasn’t how they were planning on breaking the news…! “Magnus is pregnant, and I can’t…! I won’t lose either of them, I can’t!”

/

With all the chaos, it was only understandable that none of them noticed a young girl at the beginning of her Shadowhunter training listening. Her eyes flashed when she hid behind a corner, then took a phone from her pocket. It was time for a report.

‘ _Consider it confirmed. However, unexpected complications occurred. Will provide further information as soon as possible._ ’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man… You want to kill me now, right? (winces) A lot of you have been worried about the Clave and Asmodeus in the comments. And rightfully so! But apparently a different kind of a threat was creeping far closer… (shudders)
> 
> So… Bring it on! Comments, thoughts, threats, rants! Let me hear it, I can take it. I LOVE hearing from you!
> 
> I REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT YOU’LL HAVE TO WAIT FOR THE NEXT UPDATE UNTIL NEXT FRIDAY. I’ll be traveling, so I’ll be physically away from my beloved laptop. (winces apologetically and dodges thrown objects)
> 
> IN THE NEXT ONE: Will Magnus and the baby make it through the newest scare? Alec and the gang wait anxiously for news.
> 
> Until next time, folks! I REALLY hope that I’ll see you all there.
> 
> Take care!


	5. Waiting Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and the rest of the gang wait anxiously for news. In the meantime the dark cloud threatening the hopefully soon growing family continues to grow…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew! I’m back from my trip, so it’s UPDATING TIME! Did you miss me?
> 
> And is everyone okay after 3x15? I’m not! (whimpers) Next Tuesday CAN’T come fast enough!
> 
> THANK YOU, from the bottom of my heart, for the ABSOLUTELY AMAZING comments and all the love this story’ received! It continues to blow me away. (HUGS) 
> 
> Okay, because I’ve kept you waiting after a BRUTAL cliffie… Let’s go! I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride and find it worth the wait.

The wait for Catarina seemed to last a lifetime, although it took less than half an hour before she arrived. Roughly twenty minutes into it Magnus stirred in Alec’s arms with a mew of pain and distress. Which was when the rest of the gang finally stopped asking questions that remained unanswered and Jace herded the unnecessary spectators out of the room. (Alec would’ve almost certainly snarled at them to leave much sooner if he wasn’t so focused on other things.)

The couple didn’t notice. Even though Magnus seemed half-conscious at best, his hand went immediately to his stomach. The tightness made the older man whimper all over again. A tear, just one, rolled. “No…!” a choked voice begged. “Please, no…”

Alec swallowed back his own tears and tightened his hold on his boyfriend as much as he dared to. “Let’s just… Let’s wait for Cat. Then we’ll know more. Okay?” That didn’t seem to have the comforting effect he’d been aiming for. So he went on, desperate to chase away at least a fraction of his beloved’s palpable agony. “Whatever comes… We’ll be okay.” He hoped from the bottom of his aching heart that he wasn’t lying. “So let’s just wait.”

Magnus didn’t answer, only kept staring ahead with haunted eyes and clutching at his stomach. Alec wondered with sheer terror and immense pain if this was it. His boyfriend had lost so much in such a short amount of time. If they lost this second baby… Would it be the final straw? Would he lose Magnus, too?

“Alec, I’m sorry…”

Alec shook his head immediately. His eyes welled up uncomfortably. “Don’t you dare apologize”, he practically pleaded, his voice hoarse. “There’s… There’s nothing to apologize for. You haven’t done anything wrong, you had no way of preventing this. You hear? Just try to relax.”

Magnus clearly attempted to do just that. Neither said a thing, because words would’ve done no good without any actual knowledge. They held on to each other. Both trying to find some relief from the comfort of being able to do that.

They were tangled together when Catarina walked in, a look of worry and some sadness on her face. “Izzy said that you had a pretty horrible scare.” She gave him a look that was somehow authoritative, understanding and apologetic all at once. “Give us a moment, okay? I’ll call you back in soon, I promise.”

Leaving was the absolutely last thing Alec wanted to do. But he knew that there was no point in wasting time on useless arguing. He gave Magnus a kiss and whispered a few sweet nothings they both needed, then dragged his heavy feet out of the room. He didn’t dare to look back because it might’ve made leaving impossible.

The others were waiting at the hallway. He tensed up upon emerging and getting their undivided attention. “Catarina’s checking up on him”, he announced and hoped that his tone was enough of a hint that he didn’t know more.

His words earned several slow nods. “You don’t have to explain everything right now, but…” Clary searched his face with honest concern. “What did you mean, saying that Magnus is pregnant?”

The present tense hurt Alec, made him think and hope far too much. He swallowed thickly, not looking at any of the three others. “When he went to Edom… Asmodeus did something. We found out after Iris’s attack.” He almost slipped the part about the little one they lost then but couldn’t. That wound was still too fresh.

Jace stared, so did Clary. Izzy blinked twice, quickly. “Oh…!” she exclaimed. “So… That’s why Magnus has been ill recently. We thought it was because of the magic…” She trailed off. (Speaking of wounds that were still too fresh…) She then lit up to a small smile. “Alec, you’re going to be a dad! This is amazing!”

Alec nodded numbly. He wiped his eyes so quickly that none of the others noticed. “We would’ve told you sooner, but… We needed to wrap our own heads around it first.” He fidgeted, restless and painfully tense. “I just… I want them both to be okay.” More than he could ever say.

“Magnus is tough”, Clary reassured him. (Tougher than he should’ve had to be.) “And the baby is just as stubborn as you two. Everything’s going to be just fine.”  
Alec wanted to believe her, so badly.

Jace didn’t offer words, instead just pulled him to a hug. Alec tensed up for a few seconds, then clung back tightly, almost desperately. He didn’t think there’d ever been a moment when he would’ve been more grateful for his brother’s silent support.

After a wait that felt much longer than it really was Catarina peered from the room. The look on her face made hope stir inside the archer. “I’m all done. Now would you please get in here, before he wrestles himself out of the bed against my orders to come to you?”

As if Alec would’ve needed to be asked…! Moving so fast that it would’ve seemed comical almost any other day he dashed to the room. Magnus still seemed tired and pained, but relief shone in the man’s dark eyes. “We’re okay”, the warlock hurried to announce. “Both of us.”

Catarina rolled her eyes. “’Okay’ is a bit an overstatement. But… These two are real troopers. They’re still hanging in there.”

Alec moved before deciding to do so. Until he had Magnus safely in his arms. He wrapped himself around his boyfriend as much as he could. Needing to shield the man he loved and their miracle as much as possible.

“Alexander, you’re shaking…” Magnus caressed him soothingly. “I’m fine. I’m sorry I scared you.”

Alec sniffed. “I wasn’t scared”, he muttered petulantly. He was terrified, still was.

Magnus huffed affectionately. “Of course you weren’t. My tough Shadowhunter.”

“It’s been a long day. How about I do something to help you two calm down?” Catarina reached out one hand towards them both. There was a smile on her lips and unshed tears in her eyes. “Just grab. I want you to hear something.”

Curious and slightly hesitant, Alec obeyed. It didn’t take long before he heard something. Sharp, very rapid thumping. After several moments of confusion he recognized it. When he did his heart soared and filled with warmth.

It was the baby’s heartbeat, and it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever heard.

/

Catarina was sorry to intrude on such an intimate moment. Because she definitely felt like a trespasser. But, all things considered, her presence was necessary.

Magnus seemed close to tears while a tiny smile appeared to her best friend’s lips. Alec went completely and utterly stiff, face transforming to a blank mask of shock. Then the archer simply broke down. Sobs that stemmed from an overwhelming amount of stress, worry, grief, love and relief rocked the usually emotionally reserved archer’s whole tall frame. Magnus reacted instantly, held his boyfriend as well as he could with one hand still attached to Catarina’s. When he began to whisper something to Alec’s ear that brought a few more tears she finally looked away.

And if she had tears in her eyes, neither man needed to know.

/

A couple of hours later, when Alec had calmed down and Magnus felt more awake, there was a knock on the room’s door. The archer had been close to dozing off and the warlock disturbed his boyfriend’s hard-fought calmness with remorse. He brushed the younger man’s face with his hand. Alec, who was wrapped around him like an octopus and clearly had every intention to stay that way, responded with displeased groan. Magnus countered with a kiss on his beloved’s cheek. “Sorry, Angel. I think we’re about to have company”, he cautioned, half fondly, half irritably.

“Angel?” Alec mumbled.

“Too tacky?”

“Better than Pup.”

Magnus smiled. Then turned his head when the door was pushed open. Izzy was the first to peer in. She seemed endearingly pleased to see him awake and alert. “Cat said that you’re feeling better, so…” She left the rest hanging.

“I’m quite alright.” It wasn’t until then Magnus realized that the others knew. He tensed up and felt a ridiculous urge to shield his stomach. Then again, after what just happened, could he be blamed for feeling protective? Imagining with dread how much attention his abdominal area would get in near future also made him self-conscious. “The little one just… got a little too excited.” (One day he’d feel comfortable with the b-word. Today wasn’t that day.)

Encouraged by hearing his voice, Jace and Clary also showed themselves. The redhead waved a takeaway bag from a coffee shop. “We thought that you guys might be hungry, so we got some bagels and blueberry muffins while waiting.” 

Magnus felt some nausea bubbling towards the surface. But, come to think of it… He was also hungry. He smiled gratefully and sat up. “That sounds like a splendid idea.” It still always surprised him when someone showed genuine care towards him. “I’d pay a large sum for coffee, but…”

“… no caffeine”, Alec mumbled, interrupting him. The Shadowhunter also pushed himself to a proper sitting position, stifling a yawn. (To think that they’d reached a point where Alec was comfortable with letting others see him holding his boyfriend…!) “For either one of us.”

Magnus huffed lovingly. “He’s been reading a book on pregnancy. And he’s trying to do without the things I’m supposed to avoid.”

Izzy grinned. “That’s so adorable!”

Jace groaned. “If you’re not his parabatai and main training buddy. At least now I finally know why he’s been so grumpy lately.” (Magnus felt sympathy towards the blond. Immense stress and a sudden break from caffeine weren’t a good combination on one’s temper.)

Magnus shuddered and tensed up when Clary hugged him after putting down the paper bag. (Which made Alec tense up as well in an instinctive preparation to defend.) “Congratulations”, she murmured softly. “Your baby is so lucky. You’ll be amazing parents.”

Magnus’s tension grew. How was she supposed to know that she just innocently touched upon the topic he was the most concerned about? “Thank you, Biscuit”, he managed with difficulty.

After that they kept enjoying the earlier bantering. As well as the food, Alec with gusto and Magnus far more cautiously to avoid upsetting his fickle belly too much. His boyfriend was pressed against him the entire time and would’ve probably held a hand on his stomach, just to be reassured, if they didn’t have any audience. Clary wasn’t much further, one leg leaning casually against his. Izzy and Jace had positioned themselves so that they had watchful eyes on the room’s door and window. They were the picture of Shadowhunters, as well as an aunt and an uncle to be, on duty. So much protective energy around him helped the warlock’s stiff muscles relax.

Soothed by all that comfort, Magnus managed to forget that he was at his most vulnerable. In a place full of Nephilim who wouldn’t have appreciated his presence if they knew he was there. He convinced himself to stop worrying about all the threat and uncertainty lingering in the future. Fleetingly he was also almost able to ignore the emptiness where his magic was supposed to be. And how much he would’ve needed it to keep his child and himself safe, from possible pregnancy complications and outside evils alike. For a little while Magnus was able to convince himself that everything would be just fine.

The others were too overwhelmed to ask what, exactly, caused his assault of pain.

/

Alec wasn’t embarrassed to admit that he didn’t want to let Magnus out of his sight after the recent scare. But it wasn’t like they could remain attached by the hip at all times. He was supposed to run an Institute, after all.

The fact that he was leaving Magnus to the safety of the warlock’s loft was a small comfort. As was Catarina stopping by. “He’s in the bathroom”, the archer announced when she arrived. Sounding more agitated than he would’ve liked. “He’s been there most of the morning. And last night.”

Catarina frowned. Magnus chimed in. “Alexander is being over-dramatic.” Instead of a kiss that lovers squeezed each other’s hands, briefly and tenderly. Somehow it felt more intimate. “Now go to work. Isabelle will have your head if she has to cover up for you at another meeting.”

Alec still didn’t feel ready or willing to leave. They exchanged murmured ‘I love yous’, after which he reminded Magnus to call immediately if anything felt… off. Alec’s hand brushed first warlock’s face, then his stomach. After hurried byes, because anything longer would’ve made parting impossible, he walked through the apartment’s door and closed it with immense difficulty.

Just before it closed, though, he cast just one more look towards Magnus and met a warm, loving smile. Which he returned in kind. He still felt the tingling and shortness of breath the warlock once talked to him about. And how could he not have experienced those? He was staring at the love of his life, who carried their child.

By the time Alec reached the Institute he’d made a decision. So he sought out Izzy. “I… need your help with something.”

Neither noticed that the same young Shadowhunter who appeared after Magnus collapsed was watching them. Her eyes flashed as the siblings hugged, tears of joy appearing to Izzy’s eyes. Even the usually stern-faced head of the Institute was smiling. Apparently the baby was alright. It was time to send the Clave another report.

‘ _Crisis over. Standing by for further instructions._ ’

/

“You should tell him”, Catarina sighed as soon as Alec had left.

“So he could start panicking even more? You saw him yesterday. This morning I spent an hour convincing him that going to work is the right thing to do.” At her look of disapproval Magnus raised a hand. “I know that he deserves to know. But I’m already a burden enough for him and I don’t want to add to it. Besides…” It was his turn to sigh. “He’s so excited about this pregnancy. I see it, even though he hasn’t said a thing. I can’t ruin that for him.”

Catarina’s heart ached. Why did fate always have to be so cruel on those two, when all they wanted was to be happy and together? “What if…?”

Magnus shook his head firmly. “Cat, please…!” Him using the shortened version of her name was so rare that it cut all intended protests. “I’ve been through all those ‘what ifs’ so many times in my head that its hurting. This pregnancy may be advancing too quickly for my body to adapt to it, or it may not be. We can only wait and see.” Which was very, very disconcerting, considering how much was at stake. He breathed hard, trying to regain his composure. “All I know is that as long as there’s a drop of life left in me, I’ll fight through this. I already failed one of the twins, I’m not doing it again.”

He jumped slightly from surprise when he was pulled to an embrace without any warning. When it ended he cleared his throat. “I, ah… Thank you. But… Wherever did that come from?”

Catarina shrugged. “You looked like you needed it. And, I’ve got something even better.” She searched through her bag until she found her target, and pulled it out. “I found a place that sells decent chocolate-pistachio ice-cream.”

Magnus sighed from joy. “Catarina Loss… What in the world have I done right to deserve you?”

“We’ll never know”, she fired back affectionately.

/

Later that evening Alec was perfectly content while he lay in bed, Magnus sprawled securely half on top of him. The closeness was so soothing that he’d almost fallen asleep. Until he felt the older man shiver.

“I… felt this flutter.” It would’ve been ominous, if Magnus didn’t sound so awed. “I think it’s the baby moving.”

In an instant Alec’s excitement sparked. All traces of fatigue vanished. “What?”

When he slid his hand under Magnus’s shirt and let it roam the man laughed. “Alexander, it’s too early for you to catch it. But I’m touched by your enthusiasm.”

Alec smiled every bit like the man in love he was. He gave his beloved’s lips a gentle peck. “Remember that when my fussing drives you up the wall.”

Magnus groaned. “Wonderful. Now you made the flutter intensify tenfold. Seems she shares your sense of humor.”

Alec’s eyebrow bounced up. “’She’?” He found he quite liked the sound of that.

“Just a guess.”

Quite soon after that Magnus fell asleep. Alec tackled the book they’d both been studying. Something like suspicion or a warning nagged in the back of his head. When he got to page forty-two he figured out why.

How was Magnus able to feel their child this early on?

/

At around the same time Iris received a visitor. Huddled to the furthest corner of her cell, she lifted her head upon hearing distant voices. Her eyebrow arched when she recognized one of them.

“… allowed visitors …”

“… High Warlock of Brooklyn, and she is still among those under my watch.” (What she would’ve given to get to wipe off the smug look she knew to be on Lorenzo’s face…) “I can see her whenever I please.” And indeed, moments later Lorenzo Rey materialized, in his glory that was all fool’s gold. He sighed heavily at the sight of her. “Iris Rouse… Look at the state of you.”

Iris narrowed her eyes. In a flash she was by the bars, only the metal separating them. “I did what we agreed on. I took Bane. Hurt him and his ego. Now get me out of here!”

Lorenzo watched her with pity. “If only I could. But your actions against the Accords have my hands tied.” His eyes narrowed as well. “After falling for the stupid trap the Nephilim set you can only blame yourself for this mess.”

She hissed. Wishing from the bottom of her acid-filled heart that her magic wasn’t bound. “How long do you think it’ll take before they figure you out, Rey? Before they start wondering how I knew exactly when Madzie would be at Bane’s unwarded loft?” Lorenzo was the one who sent her a fire-message when Catarina let him know that she’d be out of the city for a while. “How long do you reckon it takes before they ask themselves how I knew that this time Magnus wouldn’t be able to take me down with magic?” After finding out where she was hiding, he came to her once he had heard the news of Bane being… magically challenged.

/ _“I would take him down myself. But that’d lead to all sorts of… unpleasant questions, since I’m supposed to protect him. So I was hoping that you might take care of the heavy lifting for me.”_

_Iris didn’t have to even think about it. Ice-cold thrill went through her veins. “Gladly.” For Madzie, and herself._

_Magnus Bane would regret trying to take her child away from her._ /

Lorenzo lifted his chin. “If an official hearing ever takes place… Which one of us do you imagine has more credibility?” He gave her cell a look and wrinkled his nose. “Enjoy your new accommodations. This place suits you.” With that he turned to leave.

Iris loathed the thought of doing him a favor. But her hatred towards someone else was stronger. She aimed a blow of magic at Magnus’s stomach, knowing that it carried life he clearly had no idea of at the time. (A child for a child.) If the guards whispering about a knocked up warlock was any indication, she failed. This was her last chance to attack Magnus. “There’s something you may want to know about Bane.”

Lorenzo stopped. He didn’t turn to face her, though. “Something worth being late for a dinner reservation?”

“You be the judge.” Iris’s eyes hardened. “For the first time in history a warlock is pregnant. With a Shadowhunter’s child.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Magnus… Stop adding to your own stress and just tell Alec! (shakes head with a groan) Those poor dears…! But what is Alec planning…? And it seems Iris just can’t stop stooping lower and lower…
> 
> For the record… The thought ‘How the heck did Iris know exactly when to attack?’ has been bugging me since I saw 3x11. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if she and Lorenzo did work together! 
> 
> SOOOO… Thoughts? Comments? PLEASE, let me hear from you! It’s always a day’s highlight for me.
> 
> NEXT UPDATE COMING NEXT MONDAY OR WEDNESDAY.
> 
> Until next time! I really hope that I’ll see you all there.
> 
> Take care!


	6. Storm Clouds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before and after a rather eventful dinner with Alec’s parents, Alec and Magnus enjoy some quality time together. But threats of several kind seem to come closer and closer…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is everyone still hanging in there after the 3x16 episode / sneak peak? My heart hurts! BUT. Hold on! Magnus will be okay. And so will we. There’s just no other way. (sniffles)
> 
> WOAH! THANK YOU, so, so much, for the absolutely amazing comments, listings and love you’ve given this story! I still can’t believe how popular this story has become. (HUGS) I REALLY hope that what’s to come won’t disappoint, either.
> 
> Awkay, guys… Are you ready? Let’s go! I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride.

Another month passed by incredibly quickly. One morning Alec wrinkled his nose when he woke up to the smell of nail polish and frustrated muttering. He cracked one eye open to see Magnus trying to work on his own toenails. If the older man’s facial expression was any indication, he wasn’t satisfied with the final result. “Magnus?”

Magnus groaned and shook his head. “How do the mundanes do this? Trying to make this perfect is even more tiresome than putting on my makeup.”

“Can I help?” Alec shrugged at the other’s surprised look. “Izzy’s blackmailed, manipulated and threatened me into doing her nails a million times.” Seeing the continued hesitation, he kissed Magnus’s improperly decorated foot. “A tiger needs its claws, right?”

Magnus’s eyes softened. And so, all doubts forgotten, the man handed him the tiny bottle. Knowing exactly how much he’d just been trusted with, Alec nodded and got to work seriously.

(Perhaps polished nails were a minor detail. But he knew how important Magnus’s warpaint was to the warlock who felt lost and vulnerable without his magic. Ergo, it was important to him.)

It took some time. Mainly because Alec was slow on purpose, both to prolong he surprisingly pleasant activity and to do a decent job. When he was finally done he looked up to meet the other’s face, feeling worried and excited. “Is that good enough? I mean, I can…”

“You did a wonderful job.” Magnus smiled in the completely open, honest way that was visible far too rarely. “Thank you, Alexander.”

Alec smiled brightly, feeling ridiculously pleased with himself. “Anytime. I still don’t know why you think you need this, though. You’re perfect, just the way you are, remember?”

Magnus rewarded him with a kiss on a cheek.

The sweet moment was interrupted by the sound of Alec’s phone receiving a message. Alarm sparked inside Magnus when he saw the look that took over the archer’s face. “Is something wrong?”

Alec showed him the message. It was from Izzy. ‘ _Code red. Mom’s asking why she heard rumors of Magnus having collapsed at the Institute. What should I tell her?_ ’ “I think we have to tell my parents.”

/

Alec still remembered, to every vivid detail, how badly his parents reacted when they learned about his sexual orientation. (Their shock and displeasure definitely weren’t lessened by the fact that he came out by dumping his bride-to-be to the altar. And he sealed the revelation by kissing a male warlock in front of the whole wedding party.) With Magnus’s help his family – well, he and his mother, at least – had grown up since that… eventful day, as it was now labeled. But announcing an allegedly impossible pregnancy to a mother who only just became comfortable with the permanent presence of a warlock in their lives… And to a father who still seemed to believe that it was all a fling… Or a passing phase… It had Alec more on the edge than he would’ve cared to admit. And if he hadn’t sworn to Magnus, on his life, that he wouldn’t have a stiff drink before his boyfriend could… He would’ve probably drunk himself to oblivion hours prior the inevitable.

“Don’t you dare throw up now”, Magnus hissed from the kitchen. The man was working on something that smelled sinfully delicious and the Shadowhunter had been ordered to stay at least ten steps away from before it was done. Since food seemed to work like a spell on Maryse the previous time, perhaps it’d soften the blow of the news today as well. “I just talked Bubbette into calming down. You’re not setting off my stomach again.”

Alec blinked twice. Slowly. “Bubbette?” He huffed, despite feeling a splash of warmth and affection, deep down. “We’ve gotta have another talk about pet names.”

Magnus rolled his eyes theatrically and muttered something in a language that definitely wasn’t English. Then sampled the dinner, wrinkled his nose and added a tiny portion of one of the several spices scattered all over the kitchen counter. If the deeply satisfied sigh that ensued was any indication, the microscopic change made all the difference in the world. Alec didn’t think he’d ever loved Magnus more than he did at that moment.

He might’ve actually sputtered as much out loud. If there wasn’t a knock on the apartment’s door. The way Magnus tensed up and instinctively moved one hand protectively to his abdomen made Alec stiffen as well. After a moment they shared a look of silent understanding and support.

‘ _It’ll be okay_ ’, they promised each other without words.

And really, Alec felt silly. These were his parents, not Clave’s inquisitors. What was the worst that could happen?

/

Maryse Lightwood knew that she’d made her share of mistakes as a mother. Passing some of her former prejudices on to Max… The way she handled Alec coming out and tentatively entering a relationship… She didn’t think she’d ever stop feeling ashamed of those missteps.

But while she wasn’t the perfect mother, she also refused to believe that she would’ve been a terrible one. She loved her children more than anything in the whole world. That Magnus Bane, of all people, made one of them so very happy… It made her motherly instincts flare with desire to ensure that the happiness, something Alec hadn’t truly experienced before the warlock came along, would last. Wasn’t that what any proper mother would’ve wanted and done?

So when she received the first hints that something was wrong with Magnus she tensed up. Even further this evening for having to be in the same space with her ex-husband. Only the patience of a parent kept her from demanding answers before the couple was ready to give them.

The main course was incredibly delicious. (Maryse wished that she wasn’t too nervous to enjoy it fully.) It was during dessert Alec took a deep breath, visibly steeling himself. “So… Magnus and I… We invited you here because we have… news.”

While Robert’s eyebrows furrowed Maryse nodded. Her eyes went from Magnus to Alec, taking in how uncomfortable and nervous they both seemed. “Is everything alright with you two?”

“That’s… actually the thing.” There was a twinkle of something she almost recognized in Magnus’s eyes. “It’s… three, not two.”

/

Magnus’s heart was racing so fast the he feared it might jump out of his chest. Which inevitably led to intense fluttering in his stomach. Which led to him feeling nauseous yet again.

He’d been judged and frowned upon his whole life, he’d grown used to it centuries ago. He had a thick skin to what others thought of him. Usually.

/ _“All for a Downworlder?”_ / The memory of those words still stung. (The hormone-hurricane his body had transformed into didn’t help matters.)

Their friends took the news shockingly well. Even if the reveal to them was a figurative car crash. But these two… They were Alec’s parents. And he knew how important family was to his beloved. 

What if…? What if…? What if…?

Alec explained the whole surreal thing the best as he could. (Except for the baby they lost. That part was still too painful to be shared.) Afterwards the room got so quiet that Magnus was almost sure the others could also hear his heart pounding. He hated the way his head spun.

Maryse was speechless and wide-eyed. Robert… was slightly more vocal. “How are you going to handle this problem?”

Alec frowned. (Magnus’s stomach clenched, because he already guessed what was coming.) “What do you mean?”

“You two being… together… It’s already a scandal. And a mixed-raced baby… That’s too much.” Robert shook his head. It was impossible to tell if he was disgusted or concerned. “If people find out about this… If the Clave finds out about this…”

Magnus had never seen the kind of a look take over Alec’s eyes that filled them after those words. “Dad… Get out. Now.”

The older Lightwood man didn’t seem have any intention to obey. “Alec, there’s something you need to know…”

“Get… out!” Alec growled.

Robert still made no move to leave. Magnus did, because he needed a chance to catch his breath and pull himself together. Ignoring how dizzy he felt he made his way to the kitchen. As soon as he got there he leaned heavily against the counter and breathed. In, out, in, out…

Fantastic, the baby had been inspired to perform a full dance routine inside him…

Steps approached and he expected it to be Alec. Until he realized that the shouting match between the father and son still continued. (Who would’ve once thought that a day would come when Alec would defend him and their future together so fiercely against one of his parents? It might’ve been heartwarming if it wasn’t so sad.)

Magnus turned to find Maryse. He didn’t understand the sad look on her face until he felt the lone tear wandering down his cheeks. “Well, this is embarrassing”, he muttered and tried to force out a laugh.

“The hormones?” Maryse guessed.

Magnus nodded with a grimace.

Maryse didn’t ridicule him. Nor did she attempt to comfort him with words he didn’t really need or want. Instead she closed the distance between them and pulled him to a hug. At first he froze, but soon melted to the embrace. If he was honest, it felt good to be held like his own mother stopped holding him when she found out what he was.

Once he’d calmed down a little Maryse finally whispered in his ear. “Alec has always wanted a family. Including kids with the one he loves. I think he started to believe that it was impossible for him to get that.”

/ _“I always knew I couldn’t have what I wanted.”_ / When Alec said that on their first date Magnus imagined that the archer meant a romantic relationship. Apparently his boyfriend’s dreams had gone a little further than that.

“Thank you, for giving my boy the life he’s always wanted.”

Magnus couldn’t help but smile.

By the time Alec entered the kitchen Magnus had withdrawn to the bathroom. His mother met his anxious look with soft eyes. “He’ll be fine. It’s just hormones acting up. But in near future you should buy a lot of peanut butter and pears.” She went on at his befuddled look. “He’s going to need them if that baby inside him is anything like you were.”

/

The following morning Alec woke up to Magnus fleeing the bed. He was drowsy and confused, until the unfortunately familiar sounds of throwing up reached his ears. He sighed, worry swirling in the pit of his stomach.

This would be one of the less pleasant mornings and possibly afternoons, then…

He’d just pushed himself to a sitting position when his phone buzzed on a silent mode. Inspecting the item, he found a message from Izzy. ‘ _Mission accomplished. Meet me at the café across the street. Come alone._ ’

Alec rolled his eyes fondly, understanding why his sister and Magnus got along so well. Then grinned. Until he sobered when after one more heaving sound Magnus could be heard brushing his teeth. He sauntered to the bathroom. “I’ll go and get some of that special smoothie to help with your stomach. I’ll be right back.” He would’ve asked if the warlock was okay, but already knew what answer he would’ve gotten.

Magnus nodded and spat out toothpaste. “I think I’ll run a bath.” The man winked. “If you come back quickly enough, you’re welcomed to join me.”

Despite the current circumstances those words did funny things to certain parts of Alec.

Five minutes later he found Izzy sitting at a corner table. “Well?” That… came out less patiently than he’d intended.

Instead of saying a thing Izzy searched through her handbag and dug out a tiny, dark velvet box. Alec’s heart pounded while he took the item and opened it. To discover an astonishing beautiful onyx ring. It was made mainly of white gold, the sides of it shaped like wings. The best part, however, was the large black stone. It looked glamorous and otherworldly beautiful. Just like Magnus. “It’s perfect”, he managed. Then swallowed hard, his fried nerves tingling. “Do you think he’ll say yes?”

Izzy smacked him upside the head. (Perhaps he deserved it.) “Haven’t you seen the way he looks at you? Alec, you’re his world! Of course he’ll say yes.”

/

Preparing for the bath, Magnus felt as exhausted as he was relaxed. Far too much drama in less than a day could do that to a person, he supposed. He was undressing himself when he noticed something that stilled his hands.

At first he imagined, with horror, if what he spotted were stretch marks. Until it dawned on him that the damage was something else entirely. Angry dark bruising, around the area of his stomach and left side. While he was absolutely certain that he hadn’t hurt himself.

Magnus swallowed thickly as his mind spun in a state of chaos, until only two things made sense to him. He’d have to call Catarina. And he’d have to tell Alec.

/

Sitting at Jia Penhallow’s office, Lorenzo Rey flipped through a thick file with a degree of curiosity. There was a mountain of data on Magnus Bane.

Some of it was new information to him. Such as Magnus’s health issues. “Your little spy has been busy.”

Jia emitted a nonchalant sound. “Yes. She’s been invaluable help for a long time, now. If she carries on in a similar fashion, she has a high position waiting for her.”

The rest of the intel the Clave obtained from him, such as the bit about Magnus’s lost magic and trip to Edom. Of which Catarina had no other choice but to tell him, when he demanded who she over-exerted herself healing on the night Alec got an arrow to the chest. The moment he found out why Bane couldn’t fix his Nephilim boy he contacted the Clave. The organization… disliked Bane as much as he did, for corrupting the head of the Institute and the Seelie Queen fiasco, to name a couple of reasons. He knew that they'd reward him well for his cooperation. Besides, he did owe the Clave for helping him overthrow Magnus and get the post as the High Warlock. “We’re even, now”, he pointed out. “So I can only imagine that you invited me here today to buy another favor.”

“Something I imagine you’re more than happy to help us with.” Jia’s eyes flashed. “Iris confirmed that the baby Magnus carries is a half Shadowhunter, half warlock. Asmodeus ensured that the child also has magic, unlike Magnus at the moment." After learning of the journey to Edom and the pregnancy, it was fairly easy to put the two together. "Which makes it a valuable test subject and tool.”

“Yes. I saw your… charming laboratory when I went to visit Rouse.” Lorenzo lifted his chin. “I will help you. But only if we do this on my terms. Do we have a deal?”

Jia nodded.

/ _“For the first time in history a warlock is pregnant. With a Shadowhunter’s child”, Iris told him._

_“What makes you so sure that I wouldn’t already know?” Lorenzo had been working for the Clave for a long time, after all. He’d learned great many secrets over that time. He turned and looked at Iris with amusement and pity. “The difference between us is that I have the patience to wait for the right moment to use my knowledge.”_ /

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, there we have it. The pretty much whole scheme against Magnus and the baby is out. (shudders) Who can sense a storm of the brown variety coming…?
> 
> Good, bad, lukewarm? PLEASE, leave a comment to let me know! Hearing from you ALWAYS makes my day.
> 
> NEXT UPDATE COMING THIS THURSDAY.
> 
> Until next time! I REALLY hope that I’ll see you all there.
> 
> Take care!


	7. Connections and Proposals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec prepares for a big question. In the meantime Magnus has struggles of his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finishing a couple of scenes of this chapter took ridiculously long. (chuckles) BUT, here we are! Hooray?
> 
> THANK YOU, from the bottom of my heart, for all your comments and listings / markings! It means THE WORLD to me that so many of you have enjoyed the ride thus far. (HUGS) I REALLY hope that you’ll be as happy with what’s to come.
> 
> Awkay… Are you ready! Let’s go, and see where this story leads next.

After getting the ring from Izzy Alec took a long walk. Because seeing it made what he was about to do feel real for the first time. And suddenly he was nervous. Which was a far less humiliating way to express that he was panicking.

What if he was moving too fast? What if this was too much on top of everything Magnus struggled to deal with? What if Magnus imagined that he was only proposing out of guilt and pity over the magic loss, or because of the baby? What if Magnus didn’t want to get married, now or ever? What if Magnus hated the ring?

Alec knew that he was overthinking. People did keep telling him that he’d made a habit out of doing that. But he figured that now, if ever, he had a good reason.

But the fact stood that he wanted to spend as many years as he could with Magnus. Because he loved the warlock more than anyone in the world and he wanted to make it official. Especially now that they were becoming parents.

Alec wanted to give Magnus a ring. A vow of love. A family. A future of happiness. And he knew that Magnus was the only person he’d ever meet from whom he wanted those things in return.

So, after walking until he’d ended up to a part of the city he couldn’t recognize, Alec took a deep breath. Smiled. And dared to feel happy and hopeful.

/

Magnus twitched from tension while Catarina’s glowing hands ghosted above his abdomen. Which was too tight, again. There was also the by then healed bruising. “So…” He tried, futilely, to keep his tone light. “I’ll assume that the way you went quiet means that it is what I thought it was.”

Catarina sighed heavily. “I wish that I could say no, but… Yeah.” There was a sad look in her eyes. “The internal bleeding is under control, for now. I’m glad you called me.”

“Internal bleeding?” The room’s temperature seemed to drop at Alec’s quiet but sharp voice. There was sheer terror in the young Shadowhunter’s eyes while they went from him to Catarina, demanding answers. “What’s going on?”

Magnus tried to answer but couldn’t. He wasn’t able to push out the words. He sent a silent thank you to somewhere up above when Catarina raised her voice instead. “The baby… It’s growing very quickly.” She held a pause to let that piece of information settle in. “So quickly that Magnus’s body is struggling to keep up. I’m not a specialist when it comes to these things, but… I'm guessing that the pregnancy is advancing at least one third faster than the average. I’d try to slow it down with magic, but I fear it’d harm the baby. So I’ll do everything I can to fix the damage done and to help Magnus’s body to adjust.”

Alec swallowed thickly. Appearing scared, and every bit as young as he was. “Magnus… will be okay, right?”

Catarina inhaled a deep breath. Magnus knew her well enough to realize that she wore her professional nurse’s composure with great effort. “Like I said, I’ll do everything I can”, she promised gently. “Only time will tell.”

The look that appeared to Alec’s eyes… It was exactly why Magnus hadn’t wanted to tell him. Because he never wanted to cause so much grief and worry on the man he loved. “I don’t get it.” Alec’s voice broke ever so slightly in the middle of the sentence. “Asmodeus… If he… If he made it possible for us to have this child, then… Why would he make the pregnancy so dangerous?”

Magnus clenched his jaw and glared at a wall. Hearing his father’s name was enough to bring a bitter taste into his mouth. “Because he wants me to beg for his help. Since I refused to stay in Edom… he attempts to make me go back.”

He heard Alec’s sharp intake of a breath. “What if… What if visiting Edom is the only way?”

Magnus stared at his boyfriend. And instantly loathed the look that must’ve taken over his face, because it made Alec flinch. “Alexander, we’re not resorting to Asmodeus’s help! Because if he gets his hands on this baby he won’t give her back.”

Alec frowned. Understandably confused. “What are you talking about?”

That was when Catarina slipped out of the room, deciding to give them some privacy.

“It’s why he made it possible for us to have a child in the first place.” Magnus clenched his jaw and looked away again. “He wants someone to rule Edom beside him. And since I declined… He decided that a grandchild will do instead.” / _“Perhaps you can still be of some use for your father’s house, after all. One way or another I will have someone of my flesh ruling Edom with me. That is the least you can give me after everything I’ve done for you.”_ / He realized vaguely that he was trembling. He inhaled, too ashamed of himself to meet Alec’s eyes. The memories of his time with his father, of what the demon tried to transform him into… “All those parts of me that I hate… I got and learned them from him. And I can’t…” He shook his head fiercely, his eyes flashing. “I won’t risk him having an influence on our child. I can’t.” Finally he found the will and courage to meet his boyfriend’s eyes. “Alec, whatever happens… Promise me that you won’t have my father involved. Swear to me that you’ll do everything in your power to help me keep our daughter as far away from him as possible. Keep her safe.”

Alec stared at him in a silence for the longest time. Then nodded solemnly. “I promise.”

/ 

A couple of hours later they lay in the bed, fully clothed. They both needed the comfort of simply holding each other. Desperate to try and not let his mind get stuck on more terrifying thoughts, Alec fixed his attention on something that didn’t make him want to scream. “You keep saying that the baby’s a girl. How can you be so sure?”

He wondered if he’d asked something he shouldn’t have when Magnus tensed up and remained quiet for almost a full minute. “She’s… reaching out to me. Trying to get to know herself and me while she grows.” The warlock swallowed hard and turned his head so that Alec couldn’t see his face. “I can… I can feel her magic. It’s almost identical to mine.” The raw sorrow and longing in the man’s voice were worse and more heartbreaking than any amount of tears.

Alec realized, with a great deal of shame, that in the middle of trying to get used to becoming a dad he’d pushed aside the terrible loss Magnus suffered. (Well, one of far too many of those that’d happened lately.) The empty hole where his magic used to be… It was a wound that’d never close or stop bleeding. He tightened his hold on his beloved and wished with his all that what Magnus still had would be enough to make what’d been stolen from him bearable. “I’m sorry”, he whispered. Because he couldn’t even imagine how painful it had to be, to feel an echo of something dearly missed and not being able to touch it.

Magnus shook his head. “Don’t be. I… know that it’ll be gone soon, when she’s born, but… It’s comforting.” The older man breathed in deep. “She’ll be so strong, I can feel it.”

Alec smiled, despite the current circumstances. “Of course she will be. She’s your child. And you’re the strongest person I know.”

Magnus said nothing to that, instead led the conversation elsewhere. “She’s trying to get to know you, too. It’s gotten clearer lately.”

A spark of delight and excitement brought warmth to Alec’s chest. The thought of their unborn child reaching out to him, too… “Really?”

“Hmm.” Magnus kissed his neck tenderly. “Every time you talk she starts to move around fiercely, like she’s trying to get to you. Not even born yet, and she’s already crazy about you. She obviously has a great taste.”

That led to languid kisses and lazy fondling that never had any intention to escalate further. They simply cherished the moment. In those stolen minutes they both had everything they needed in their arms. Alec felt the ring-box hidden to his pocket and his mind strayed to dreams of a future he prayed would come one day.

_Please_ , his mind pleaded. He tightened his hold on Magnus while the man moaned from pleasure. _Angel, don’t take this away._

/

The following morning awakened them to a far less dramatic problem. Alec was out of clean clothes. With everything that’d been going on, he’d completely forgotten both laundry and to drag fresh garments to Magnus’s loft.

It’s funny how something unremarkable can sometimes lead to something life changing.

Magnus watched Alec while he put on one of the warlock’s shirts that had too short sleeves for him. And spoke up seconds before the archer would’ve asked what was wrong, sounding almost shy. “We wouldn’t keep having this problem if you moved all your things here.”

Alec’s heart jumped. He turned slowly, barely daring to hope that he got what he just heard right. “Are you… asking me to…?” When he realized that he did, in fact, get it right he lit up to the brightest smile he’d ever worn in his life. “Do you mean that?”

Magnus nodded with a tiny smile of his own. “After everything we’ve been through lately… I think it’s time. And… I want you to live where our child does. She wants you here, I feel it. And so do I.”

Alec wanted to rejoice. But after Magnus’s refusal when he first asked… Of course they’d been through several lifetimes’ worth of obstacles since, but… “Are you sure?”

Magnus nodded firmly. Clearly seeing how much Alec needed him to be certain. “I wasn’t ready then. But I am now”, the older man swore, gently and affectionately. “I love you, and…” He trailed off. Noticing what Alec did seconds earlier. A trickle of blood coming from his nose.

Alec’s stomach clenched. “Magnus? Are you okay?”

Magnus’s reassurances were incredibly convincing while the warlock wiped away the drops of red. “Alexander, your concern is touching. But it’s just a little nosebleed.” They exchanged a sweet kiss. “Now go to work so I can start emptying drawers for you.”

Alec’s former smile returned, if possible even brighter. He was home, officially. And if he’d had any doubts about proposing to Magnus left… They all flew away.

He already took off. But in less than thirty seconds he rushed back and gave Magnus a long, passionate kiss. “I love you, too”, he proclaimed with a goofy grin the moment they broke apart.

/

Once Alec left properly Magnus felt his own smile falter to a grimace when the pain that’d been nagging in his head from the moment he woke up spiked. It was like a stab and he groaned, bringing a hand to his temple. It was entirely too easy to recognize the mind suddenly seeking contact with his. “Stay out of my head”, he hissed.

‘ _Surely it isn’t my fault if my own granddaughter wanted to reach out to me?_ ’ Asmodeus sounded sickeningly smug. ‘ _She will always be drawn to Edom. I made sure of it._ ’

Magnus’s eyes flashed while he placed a protective hand against his abdomen. Of course he knew that Asmodeus wasn’t in the room, but even the feeling of this feeble telepathic invasion… “I won’t let you lay a finger on her”, he growled, from the depths of the darkest corners of his soul. “And I will never beg you for help again.”

‘ _Oh, I’m not expecting you to do the begging. But how much more of your suffering do you reckon that Nephilim of yours can stand before he’s ready to make a deal with the devil?_ ’ Asmodeus emitted a sound of vague amusement. ‘ _They fall so easily, those with angelic blood, because they love too deeply for their own good. You know that as well as I do. You can tell your Alexander to stay away from me all you like. But one day soon he will be begging for my help. And I will enjoy every moment of it._ ’

Magnus breathed. If only he had his magic to lash out with…! “You already took away what made me who I’m supposed to be”, he snarled under his breath. The words hurt too much to be made louder. “You won’t get anything more. From me or Alec.”

‘ _We shall see._ ’ And with those ominous words the brief connection closed. The awful sense of Asmodeus’s presence didn’t stop haunting Magnus for hours. He hoped to never experience anything like that again.

“You already stole enough from me”, he muttered. Eyes narrowed and his tone bitter. “Just leave me alone already.”

/

In Edom Asmodeus’s eyes went from milky white to cat like. And he smirked. “Magnus, Magnus, Magnus… You shouldn’t dare me. You know that I love a challenge.” His eyes flashed while he watched his son’s magic dancing around his hand, longing the body in which it resided for hundreds of years. “I will see you soon.” But he would wait for an invitation. Patiently, despite not being a patient man. It would be terribly mundane to be rude, after all. And sometimes getting things done too quickly ruined the fun.

/

Two weeks later Izzy announced to Magnus that it was high time he left the apartment for longer than five minutes to get some fresh air. It wasn’t until then he realized just how little he’d felt like… doing anything for a long while. So, for the first time in days – or perhaps weeks – he put on makeup. (It still felt vile and wrong to do it the mundane way.) Then he got dressed. And realized with dismay that while he wasn’t paying attention he’d developed a barely visible bump that made wearing his favorite pants impossible. (Of course he knew, on a level of reason, that it was bound to happen eventually. And that he was being a vain fool. But it still stung.) It helped a little that Alec was obviously thrilled.

Gently, as though handling the most precious china, the Shadowhunter caressed the barely-there swell. Eyes twinkling in a way Magnus had never seen before. “That’s our little girl”, the archer mused quietly, in joy and marvel.

The tone and facial expression made Magnus’s heart melt. But instead of voicing that he placed his hand on top of Alec’s, intertwining their fingers. Nothing more needed to be said.

For a few moments they just stayed there and dared to dream.

Not much later Magnus was walking around a mall with Izzy. It definitely wasn’t the first time they went shopping together. But it was the first time since Edom. And Magnus realized that it was a tiny bit of normalcy he’d missed. He’d been so ridiculously emotional lately that he might’ve uttered as much. If he hadn’t spotted something that made him lose focus on everything else.

There, at the window of a toy-store, was the kind of a bunny meant for the smallest of babies. It was pink and visibly soft. If the amount of activity in his stomach was any indication, the baby liked it as much as he did.

“First toy, huh?” Izzy guessed gently.

Magnus could only nod. He wasn’t aware of the dreamy look that appeared to his face. “Looks that way”, he confirmed.

“You know what? I’m buying it for you.” He was about to protest but she went on firmly. “I’m still mad at you and Alec for not letting us throw a party in honor of you two moving together. Let me buy this for my niece and I’ll stop nagging.” The look in Izzy’s big, pleading eyes ensured that he’d already lost the argument.

Magnus nodded. And loathed how emotional he was feeling. (He was so done with all the hormones…!) “Thank you.” They both knew that it was for far more than a silly toy. In all the centuries he’d lived Magnus hadn’t grown used to people caring about him enough to buy gifts.

“Stop looking like you’re about to cry.” Izzy tried adorably hard to sound stern. “It makes me want to cry.”

Magnus chuckled. To his relief he didn’t transform to a teary mess. “How about I buy us both some pear ice-cream?” He was developing a severe addiction to that stuff.

Izzy grinned. “You’re full of great ideas.” She linked their arms. “Shall we?”

“Lead the way”, he encouraged. And there, with her soothing warmth close… He forced himself to let go of all sorrows and worries. Even if only for a moment.

/

By the time Magnus got home his head was pounding and he felt utterly drained. All that, however, faded to the background as soon as he entered the dimly lit apartment. He frowned. “Alexander? Are you home?” Was the archer working late again?

Apparently not, because he smelled something that promised to be divinely delicious. If he wasn’t much mistaken it was his favorite dish, from both their favorite restaurant. One corner of his lips twitched upwards. Which felt strange with how little honest smiling he’d done lately.

“At the balcony”, Alec called out.

Still confused, and growing mildly suspicious, Magnus headed to the given direction. His heart skipped a couple of valuable beats when he took in the sight before him. “Alexander, what…?” He trailed off.

The balcony was decorated by what had to be at least a hundred candles. In the middle of them stood Alec, appearing more nervous than Magnus had ever seen him. “Magnus, I…” The archer swallowed when words failed him. “Before I met you… I had no idea who and what I was. Or well, I did, but I refused to admit it even to myself. Then you came along and shattered everything I imagined my life would be. No words will ever be able to thank you enough for that.” Alec’s eyes grew moist for a moment. “I know that you don’t see it yourself, but… When you enter the room, you light up everyone and everything around you. You’re the most amazing person I’ve met. You’re my world. My one and only. And I… I want to spend every single day fate gives us together. So…” The Shadowhunter was shaking. The reason became obvious when the young man went down on one knee, slowly, slowly. Eyes full of hope, fear, love and hesitation when they met his. And that was when the archer revealed the most beautiful ring Magnus had ever seen. “Will you marry me?”

The whole world began to spin in front of Magnus’s eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man… SOOOO, what next? Will Alec or something sweep Magnus off his feet? And more importantly… What will the answer be? Also… Asmodeus has officially joined the party…!
> 
> How was that? Any good at all? PLEASE, do let me hear from you! Your comments ALWAYS brighten my days.
> 
> Until next time! I REALLY hope that I’ll see you all there.
> 
> Take care!


	8. The Right Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After some drama Alec finally gets an answer. Is it the one he was hoping for?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yuuuup. I hope that you all made it through 3x16 alive! Because… Here’s another chapter!
> 
> DAAAAANG! THANK YOU, a million times over, for all your AMAZING comments and love! I can’t believe that so many of you are so into this story. (BEAMS, and HUGS) I REALLY hope that what’s to come won’t disappoint, either!
> 
> Awkay… Are you ready? Because here we go! I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride.

Magnus stared at Alec and forgot to breathe. He wasn’t able to think much of anything. The whole world spun around and around. So fast, too fast… 

Yet everything seemed to happen in slowed motion. Alec’s facial expression changed from hopeful to hurt, then to concerned. (He hated being the cause of that.) “Magnus?” The Shadowhunter began to approach him almost cautiously. (He hated that wariness, too.) “Are you okay?”

He opened his mouth, but before he could utter a sound the spinning stopped and the world fell into darkness.

The next thing he was able to register was whispering voices. Or maybe his hearing wasn’t functioning properly. “… alright … still way too high but …” _Catarina?_

Magnus frowned. What was too high? He tried to wrestle his eyes open, only to notice that he barely had enough energy for such a simple task. His pathetic, small noise of irritation earned some attention.

“Magnus?” Alec’s face seemed oddly blurry. “Hey. There you are.”

Magnus’s frown deepened. His head was fuzzy and he felt… heavy. Was that why things didn’t seem to quite make sense? “What happened?”

Alec’s relieved expression fell to one of utter misery, guilt and worry. Catarina answered for the archer. “Your blood pressure, which has been too high for a while, sky-rocketed. That would be why you passed out. Which means that it’s full bedrest for you until we have that under control.” She narrowed her eyes at his eyebrow, which quirked almost instinctively. “And I mean rest, Bane. So no doing the nasty until you feel better.”

Magnus huffed and rolled his eyes. Then noticed from the corner of his eye how tense and pale Alec was. “Alexander.” He went on roughly two seconds later, when he had his beloved’s full attention. “I’m fine. Mostly I’m embarrassed about swooning like that.” He took a deep breath, pleased when it didn’t make the world sway but also tense. Unless he dreamt what happened right before he passed out there were some things that had to be cleared out. “But… I think we need to talk.”

Alec went from slightly calmer to as tight as his bow’s string while nodding robotically.

/

Neither man paid much attention to Catarina leaving the room. Alec’s chest clenched all over again while he swallowed, watching his boyfriend sit up. “Magnus, I’m so sorry.” In the twenty minutes Magnus was out he’d beaten himself up a million times. He couldn’t believe that something he planned to be perfect went so ridiculously wrong. “This was my fault. It was too much. I...”

“Why did you propose to me?” Magnus went on when he only frowned as a response. “What you said… Did you mean it?”

Alec felt hurt. Until he realized that Magnus seemed genuinely confused, not accusative. “Of course I did.” How the other could ever doubt that was beyond him. But he had a feeling that it wasn’t something either of them had any control over. “How can you even ask that?”

“Because I can’t fathom why you would want me like this.” Without my magic. Magnus licked his lips and looked away, visibly mortified upon realizing his admission. The man appeared pained and embarrassed. “Also… I’ve never had anyone who would’ve… cared enough to…” He left the rest hanging. “I’ve loved in the past, and I’ve been loved in return. But when it came to taking… that step… It’s never quite worked out. It’s come close a couple of times, but… Fate got in the way.” The pain those memories brought was palpable. “With the rest… Well. Dating me is one thing. But marrying me?” Magnus shrugged and did his best to make it seem nonchalant. “It’s like I told you once. I’m a lot to get used to.”

There was a time when thoughts of Magnus’s past loves and lovers nearly drove Alec insane with jealousy. But now, staring at the man who was so shocked over someone wanting to spend some form of forever with him that he collapsed… The Shadowhunter began to realize how unwanted the centuries old warlock must’ve felt over the course of his life. “I meant what I said”, he announced, firmly but gently. Hoping that the older man would’ve met his eyes to see how sincere he was.

“Would you have proposed if I was still immortal?”

Alec felt a twinge of ache. While he’d always had his insecurities, he hadn’t noticed Magnus’s own carefully hidden ones. He answered slowly but only because he could sense how important it was to answer correctly. “Yes, of course”, he swore. “You’re the one person I can’t live without. And I’ll only find love like that once.”

Magnus finally looked at him, searched his eyes for even the slightest trace of doubt or regret. “How can you feel that way? I don’t…” The man breathed sharply, visibly trying to calm down, for his own sake and the baby’s. “I’m not even the same man you fell in love with.”

“Yes, you are!” Alec insisted. Perhaps more sharply than he’d meant to. “I know that you don’t feel like it. And I… I wish that you could see what I do when I look at you. But… To me you are the same. Magic or no magic. Your heart and soul… They’re still the same. And those are what I fell in love with.”

Magnus remained still and quiet, facing away once more.

Alec gave them both a few moments before going on. “Honestly? I’ve… been thinking about proposing since I got an arrow to my chest. When I lay there on the ground, looking up at you…” He sniffled, his eyes growing moist for a second. “I got you back from hell. So… I decided that if I’d make it, I’d try to stop overthinking and wasting time. I got even surer… after Iris.” He almost regretted his words when memories of those awful days made Magnus stiffen. “It’s soon, I get that. But… I don’t think it’s too soon. Because, if we keep waiting for the right time… For the right moment… It may never come.” He kissed Magnus’s cheek and was pleased when his boyfriend melted to the contact. “I love you. You’re my world. And you’re the other parent of my children.” (They both ached at the plural, but it was true. As far as they were concerned, they’d always have two kids. And maybe, Alec dared to wish, even more one day…) “Of course I want to marry you.”

Magnus remained quiet for a while. Then leaned his head against his shoulder. “That was very well said.”

Alec just had to smile. And kiss the other’s hair. “Well enough to convince you?” He didn’t succeed in making that sound as light as he would’ve wanted.

Magnus took his hand and gave it a squeeze. “You never had to convince me to want to marry you, Alexander”, the warlock whispered. “I’ve been yours since I first saw you.”

Alec’s heart jumped so violently that he feared it might come up through his throat. He barely dared to believe this. “Is… that a ‘yes’?”

Their eyes met. “I’m done wasting time, too.” Magnus continued when the load of emotions seemed to be getting too much. “For the record, you’re the first one to ever sweep me off my feet that way.”

Alec grimaced only half-jokingly.

“Too soon?”

“Let me put a ring on you and I’ll forgive you.”

/

Not… getting intimate to honor the special occasion was one of the hardest battles the couple had ever fought. Whenever his urges almost got the better of him Alec reminded himself masochistically of how Magnus passed out from stress. Keeping it in his pants was helped by the fact that they were both exhausted from the long and emotional day.

Alec dozed off. And woke up to voices just outside the room. He tensed up, feeling even more protective after the recent events.

Until a gentle hand caressed him. One that had a new ring on it. “Alexander, it’s alright. We’re safe. Calm down.”

Alec did, but not easily. Recognizing the voices helped. Jace, Izzy, Clary and Simon. But what were they doing in their apartment? (It felt incredibly good to call it theirs officially.) “What’s going on?” he mumbled and yawned, struggling to wake up properly.

“When I came home today I noticed that you had a fancy dinner planned for us. It’d be a shame to let it go to waste. And today, if ever, we have plenty of reason to celebrate. It’d be a shame to waste that, too.” Magnus faced his look of protest with the kind of a facial expression that made it impossible to say ‘no’. “Alexander… We never celebrated when you were fully recovered. Or when Clary returned. Or even when you moved in. And with… everything that’s going on…” The older man cleared his throat, then went on. “I’m afraid that all the chaos, sadness and losses will make us forget that there are good things happening, too. Because… I need to remember. And I think you could use a reminder, too.”

Magnus won Alec over before even saying a word. Still… “So you decided to arrange an engagement party when you’re supposed to be on bedrest?” He didn’t manage to sound as stern as he would’ve wanted to.

Magnus gave him his best innocent look. “I didn’t even leave the bed. I swear.” A phone was waved at him. “I had everything I needed right here.”

Alec snorted with a grin that showed despite his resistance. “You’re impossible.” And he meant that in the best way imaginable.

Magnus seemed to figure out as much, if the softening of those dark eyes was any indication. “I love you, too. Now can I send them a message to bring in the food before they eat it all without us?”

Alec smiled. Then frowned. “Are you sure you’re okay enough for this?”

Magnus gave him a mocked scandalized the look. “Have you met me? I’m always okay enough for a party.” He received a wink from his fiancé. (He could definitely get used to that word.) “Especially if it’s the kind of a party that leads to devouring something delicious in bed.”

Alec felt color rising all the way to the tips of his ears.

/

Magnus wasn’t a fan of letting people see him when he was vulnerable. But he decided that it was bearable when the bedroom filled with chatter and laughter. All that life filled something deep inside him, too.

He hadn’t exactly told the others everything when inviting them over. A picture of his newest ring was enough to distract them from asking why Catarina had demanded that he’d stay in bed. When Alec told their guests about the proposal he interrupted his fiancé before he would’ve gotten to the part where Magnus passed out. It wasn’t something he felt like sharing with… well, anyone.

The baby, as it turned out, succeeded in drawing attention away from that direction. After a brief silence in the conversation Simon perked up visibly. Excitement took over the vampire’s eyes. “I… heard this really fast thumping. Is it the baby’s heartbeat?” After his slow nod the younger man seemed even more thrilled. A hand started reaching out towards his stomach. “Can I…?”

Now this, was something Magnus had been dreading. Unlike most people seemed to imagine he wasn’t actually a big fan of being touched all of a sudden. And after a day such as the one he’d had… He felt a little overprotective, against every little bit of his reason. Which he clearly radiated to Alec, who was somehow able to get even tenser than the archer had been. The look appearing to the Shadowhunter’s face suggested that Simon might get his teeth, fangs and all, struck in soon if he didn’t withdraw.

Which Simon did. He was a smart guy, after all. “Maybe… later.”

“Yes. Later.” Magnus ruffled Alec’s hair. (‘ _Stop picking on him._ ’) Which earned him a guilty almost-grin despite their audience. (‘ _Sorry._ ’) “Now, I’d pay a large sum for some more of that sauce.”

“I have something even better.” Alec visibly braced himself before finding the will to leave the bed. “Earlier today I was optimistic and bought some celebratory pear ice-cream.”

Magnus was all too aware that the look in his eyes was probably disgustingly adoring. He also didn’t care. “Careful. Surprises like that make me want to marry you.”

Alec’s overjoyed, proud smile was definitely the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen in his life, and he’d lived for a very long time.

/

Two very long weeks, which were full of frustration and strained tempers, was how long it took before Alec dared to try anything more intimate with Magnus. He knew that he was being ridiculous. But surely it was better to be ridiculous than to lose… everything.

That morning he was taking a colder than necessary shower when the bathroom door opened. He smiled. “I thought you were still asleep.”

“I was. Until I woke up to an empty bed. And realized that you’d decided to take a shower without me.” Magnus sounded amused and annoyed. “You know how much I enjoy showers.”

Alec turned with a sheepish look on his face and instantly had his arms full of the man he loved. “Sorry about that. But Cat said that you need rest…”

“Alexander.” Magnus’s eyes were full of similar… determination a far more intimate part hardening echoed. “I’m not in pain, exhausted or nauseous right now. And I’m not made of glass so stop treating me like it. But these hormones are driving me insane and I want you.”

Well… Alec was quite incapable of not doing his best to give Magnus everything the older man wanted. Especially if said man stood before him stark naked.

For them two weeks was a very… very… very long time to go without. Alec had to admit that he was needy, too. So, ignoring the voice in his head screaming at him to not risk anything, he attacked his fiancé’s lips. They tasted of peanut butter and something distinctly Magnus that drove him wild.

Neither noticed the water pouring over them while they explored one another. Savored every little bit. Eventually Alec pinned Magnus against the wall and lifted the warlock’s arms, gently but with purpose, so that they were also pinned above the other’s head. Then he pressed closer, and closer, until he was sure that Magnus felt every… single… bit of him.

Driven by sheer heat, Alec bit Magnus’s lip playfully. Which enticed a reaction. But not from the other man.

Alec gasped against the other’s lips when he felt… a thud. A kick. “What the…?” He met Magnus’s eyes without the slightest clue how to feel. “Did our daughter just… kick me?”

The kind of a laugh he’d missed bubbled from Magnus. “Not even born yet… And she’s already as overprotective as you are.”

Alec didn’t bother commenting. His hands were a little unsure while they felt around. “It doesn’t hurt, right?”

“No. It makes me a little queasy sometimes, if she gets very excited. But I’m used to it.” Magnus kissed his cheek affectionately. “Don’t overthink it. Just enjoy it.”

That was when Alec felt a definite kick, this one inquisitive rather than hostile. Then another. And, with shower water masking his tears, he did enjoy himself that morning, immensely. Just not in the way he’d been expecting.

/

On a nightstand in the bedroom Alec’s phone buzzed while a message was left to his answering machine. The quiet, shaky voice belonged to Robert Lightwood. “ _I know that you don’t want to talk to me. And I know how stubborn you can be. But you have to hear me out. It’s about Magnus._ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now… Those who have read… basically anything from me before know that this soft of a chapter can only mean one thing. (winces) So… Enjoy this. Draw strength and warmth from this.
> 
> And place your bets! Was Robert’s phone call a trap? Or is he sincerely trying to help?
> 
> AND, the most important question of all… Was that any good, at all? PLEASE, do let me know! I LOVE hearing from you.
> 
> IN THE NEXT ONE: Not quite sure when the baby will be born, Alec and Magnus start taking care of the more practical aspects of becoming parents. Such as setting a room for their child. Their joy is dimmed by the fact that the pregnancy seems to have reached the stage where the baby grows up the fastest. 
> 
> IF everything goes according to my plans… NEXT CHAPTER COMING ON THURSDAY.
> 
> Until next time! I really hope that you’ll all join in for that one.
> 
> Take care!


	9. Holding on to What’s Good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus start to truly prepare for the arrival of their arrival. In the meanwhile the pregnancy continues to advance at a terrifying pace...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I almost didn’t nail today’s update. BUT, for a good reason! I caught a NASTY little stomach flu. Let’s say that I now have entirely new sympathy towards Magnus’s struggles with nausea in this story… (groans) (Don’t worry, I’m almost fully okay, now.)
> 
> THANK YOU, so, so much, for every single comment, kudos and bookmarking! You have no idea how happy they make me. (HUGS)
> 
> Awkay, because I’m not heartless enough to keep stalling… Let’s go! I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride.
> 
> REMEMBER THAT THIS STORY’S TIME-LINE IS ONLY PARTIALLY THE SAME AS 3B’S! AND SOME THINGS HAPPEN SLIGHTLY DIFFERENTLY. (Just mentioning this so you won’t get confused.)

Over the next couple of weeks Magnus found his and Alec’s apartment invaded most of the time. For the first few days he was foolish enough to imagine that it was a coincidence. But shortly after that he began to see a pattern. Almost whenever Alec went to work someone appeared to keep Magnus company. It was like they were taking shifts to ensure that he was alone as little as possible. And, without a doubt, to check that he wouldn’t overexert himself. For a man who’d spent centuries looking after himself such sudden attention… well, took a lot to get used to.

One rainy morning he woke up to noise coming from the kitchen. At first he was sleepy enough to wonder if it was Alec. Until a far more feminine voice swore, loudly. Followed by a male voice. “… said that you knew this recipe…!”

Magnus got up a little faster than his head would’ve appreciated, eager to salvage what was left of the kitchen. As soon as the ensuing spinning sensation stopped he pushed himself to motion. If the kicking in his stomach was any indication, his daughter shared his dread.

Izzy and Simon were working on something that was probably supposed to be actual food. It was quite hard to identify the charred remains. At least it looked like a fire extinguisher wouldn’t be necessary. The stench nonetheless made nausea skyrocket and Magnus fought a small war to keep himself from vomiting.

Izzy’s hiss of pain helped chase away his momentary discomfort. She was cradling her right hand, which she seemed to have burned with the frying pan. Magnus sighed and moved without thinking. “The Lightwood family and cooking… Why don’t you let me give that hand a look?”

Neither Simon or Izzy was fast enough to stop him before it was too late. Before his hand ghosted uselessly above the minor injury. And it wasn’t until then Magnus’s drowsy, sluggish mind remembered that the magic he felt deep inside him was the baby’s, not his. There was nothing he could do anymore when those he cared about were hurting.

That bleak realization hit him like a sledgehammer. Doubled by all the hormones coursing through his body. It was like a wound that hadn’t even started to heal properly had been torn wide-open once more. Only sheer willpower kept him from cracking under the pressure building up inside his ribcage.

Then Izzy grabbed his hand, which was still raised and wavering, and wrapped her fingers firmly around it. After a delay he returned the hold. A few seconds of silence passed by before Izzy gave him another squeeze, then let go gently. “I’ll stop by at the bathroom to fix up kitchen mishap 201.”

Magnus wasn’t quite okay enough to sound or seem amused. But he felt his features soften while he inspected the breakfast disaster. “I’ll try to put together something a little more appetizing than… whatever this was supposed to be.” It was a tiny bit of comfort to concentrate on something he was still able to do. “And don’t worry, I won’t tell Alexander that you two coaxed me out of the bed.”

Simon released a nervous half-laugh. “Yeah, ah… I’d appreciate that. He’s… not exactly my biggest fan as it is.” The vampire went on shortly after Izzy had left the room. “Look… I… actually came here this morning to see you.” The young man shifted nervously. “A few days ago there was this… undercover mission. And… I spent a little while in the same cell with Iris.” Seeing his fast-rising startle and anger, the vampire hurried to continue. “Don’t worry, she’s still very much locked up. But… She’d been turned into a mundane. You know, by Aldertree’s project. And she said… some stuff. About how it feels to live without magic.” Simon studied him with a frown of worry while he did his best to focus on gathering ingredients instead of the emotional turmoil threatening to boil over. “Are you… okay?”

The seemingly simple question made Magnus freeze in the middle of motion. He swallowed thickly, squeezing a tomato almost hard enough to crush it. “Honestly?” He inhaled a deep breath. “If it wasn’t for the baby… I’m not sure what I’d do to get my magic back.” He knew that there was a way. A desperate, terribly dangerous method. But there was absolutely no way he was going to risk the fragile life growing inside him. Without noticing it he pressed his hand against his abdomen. Feeling the movements inside helped lift the dark veil threatening to cloud his mind a little. “Right now… I’m focusing on her.” And she was more than enough reason to keep fighting even through the worst of days.

He tensed up, more out of surprise than anything else, when without a warning Simon pulled him to a hug. He had to remind himself several times that this was a friend before he managed to relax. “Not… that I’m complaining, but… What’s this all about?”

Simon shrugged. “You just… looked like you needed this.”

Magnus didn’t know how to comment. The baby did. Simon yelped when there was a strong, purposeful kick. “What…? Was that the…?” the vampire sputtered.

Magnus came close to laughing. “Don’t take it personally. She… tends to do that when people touch me.”

Simon snorted. “Well. She’s definitely Alec’s daughter.”

Some time later Magnus observed the interaction between Izzy and Simon from the corner of his eye. It took him a long moment to notice that subtle, barely detectable change. The first sparks of something new. Once he spotted it a tiny, knowing smile appeared to his lips.

/

A couple of evenings later Alec panicked irrationally when he came home and didn’t find his fiancé immediately. Until it crossed his mind to check out the room Jace occupied for a while, once upon a time. What he discovered brought a smile to his face.

Magnus lay on the bed, curled up comfortably and fast asleep. There was a piece of paper right beside the slumbering man, and Alec inspected it curiously. To find a list of things that a nursery would need.

Magnus… was nesting.

“I know that Catarina’s still insisting on bedrest”, his mother’s voice whispered. Full of warmth. “But he was too restless to stay in the bedroom, so I decided that this is the next best thing.”

Alec smiled. Then frowned, his ever-hyper-active protective instincts taking over. “He’s okay, right?”

“As okay as he can be.” Maryse gave the sleeping man a fond look. “He reminds me of myself, when I was expecting you. He’s just as scared and excited.” She then frowned. “He… mentioned something about the pregnancy advancing quickly.”

Alec nodded, the tension from before intensifying. “It hurts him, sometimes.” His stomach knotted while fears he’d been wrestling with for weeks threatened to boil over. “Catarina’s helping him with it.” He hoped, for the sake of his fiancé and their unborn child, that the help would be enough.

“You look like you could use some sleep, too.” His mother was already putting on a coat. “Call me, at any time, if either of you needs me. That’s what moms and mother in laws are for.”

Alec smiled, and not for the first time marveled how far they’d both come in such a short amount of time.

Maryse was honestly supposed to leave right after. But just before closing the door she realized that she’d forgotten her purse. On her way out she peered towards the room where her first-born was with his beloved. The sight made her pause.

Alec did his best to lay down slowly and gently. But the slightest movement of the mattress, or perhaps something as simple as Alec’s presence, was enough to rouse Magnus. Barely, anyway. Not a word was said. The look the lovers exchanged spoke everything necessary.

Seeing her son love someone so fiercely… To be loved as much in return… It made her feel more than a little choked up.

Alec settled down with a yawn. As soon as he lay comfortably Magnus took his place right beside the taller man. Then guided one of the archer’s hands to his stomach, which Alec accepted with visible eagerness. With Magnus’s barely visible bump between them the two exchanged a languid, loving kiss.

That was when Maryse decided to leave. She’d already intruded on the private moment too long. Outside the apartment she wiped her eyes, surprised to find them moist.

/

Early in the following morning Alec woke up to a sound that immediately brought chills down his spine. A groan of pain. Over the past week or so those had been such common occurrences that he knew what was going on even before gently lifting the hem of Magnus’s shirt. True enough, dark, angry bruising sneered back at him.

Magnus groaned again. And bit back a grimace. “Not again…”

Alec swallowed hard and caressed his beloved’s hair while his other hand reached out for a phone. “Try to relax. Catarina will be here soon.”

Magnus nodded and leaned against him, trembling slightly from pain he refused to admit. And Alec held him, because it was the only thing he could do. It was maddening to feel so utterly helpless.

Fortunately Catarina arrived swiftly, with a deep frown on her face. “Not again”, she sighed, mimicking her best friend’s words from not too long ago. Then got to work.

Just like every time, Magnus looked away from her glowing hands. Knowing all too well why, Alec tightened his embrace and hoped that it was enough comfort. Needing magic to be used on him repeatedly after losing his own… It was a bitter insult to injury. And then there were the potentially life-threatening elements.

Stress like this was the last thing Magnus needed.

“Why is this happening so frequently now?” Alec demanded once Magnus had retreated to the bathroom.

Catarina sighed heavily. “This seems to be the last trimester of the pregnancy. Which means that the baby’s growing much faster than before. And the baby’s position is also problematic. I dread to imagine how many internal organs are under pressure.”

Alec shuddered. “So… The baby’s coming soon, right?”

“Looks that way.” What she refused to say was loud in the air. (They could only hope that the little girl inside Magnus was ready to be born before the man’s body would reach its limit.) Then, determined to direct both their thoughts elsewhere, Catarina grinned. “Also… I found what you asked me to.”

A couple of hours later, once Alec had managed to reassure himself that Magnus would be alright, the young Shadowhunter was busy with what Catarina smuggled in. It was a beautiful, white crib. The second he saw a picture of it he knew that it was the one for their child. He just hoped that Magnus would agree.

Apparently he was about to find out sooner than he’d planned. Because while he was trying to figure out how to put together the trickiest bits a sleepy voice came from the room’s doorway. “Alexander, what…?” Magnus paused. “Oh…!”

Alec glanced towards the older man, trying to read his emotions. “I… get it, if you think it’s too soon. And we can always return it…” He stopped short upon noticing how moist the other’s eyes had grown. “Magnus?”

Magnus sniffled. “Don’t you dare return it. It’s perfect.” With that Alec was tackled to the floor, his arms full of his fiancé who was kissing him with fiery passion.

The crib didn’t advance further that night. 

/

A few days later Magnus was trying to make the most of his emotionally and physically best day in what felt like forever. Perhaps his head was pounding and his stomach cramped every now and then. But the sad truth was that it was the most comfortable he’d felt in a while. So he sauntered to the guest-room and began to continue the plans for a nursery. Determined to focus on the good things coming to keep what he’d lost and all the threat looming around the budding happiness from consuming him.

Magnus was so deep in thought that he shivered when there was a knock on the apartment’s door. He frowned and the baby started moving around restlessly. Slowly and reluctantly he headed to the door. And regretted his decision the second he saw who came knocking.

There was something like despair on Robert Lightwood’s face. “I’m aware that I’m not welcomed here, but… Magnus, please!” The plea was so unexpected that it stopped the warlock from shutting the other out. Robert went on the second he saw his opportunity. “I’ve been trying to contact Alec, but he won’t listen to me. I was… I was hoping that you might.”

Magnus nodded slowly. Then moved out of the way to let the other man in. He hoped dearly that he wasn’t making a huge mistake. “You have five minutes”, he announced.

Robert ran a hand through his hair. “Clave has a file on you”, the man blurted out, clearly determined to use the time he was given well. “I caught a glimpse of it, but didn’t have the kind of an authorization to read it.” Robert’s jawline tightened. “I… I think they know about the baby, somehow. I have no idea what they’re planning on doing with that knowledge.”

Cold filled Magnus’s whole body while he shielded his abdomen with his hand. The thought of someone aside his father being after his child… “Why are you telling me this?”

Robert sighed. “I may not be the biggest supporter of your relationship with Alec, but… That’s my grandchild you’re carrying.”

Magnus had no idea if he should’ve believed anything that came out of the other man’s mouth. Nor did he have the time to decide. Because all of a sudden the kind of pain he’d never known before took over his stomach. He groaned and sough support from a wall to avoid slumping to the floor.

“Magnus?” Robert’s voice sounded frantic and incredibly far away. “What’s going on?”

Magnus tried to answer. Instead he fell into a fit of coughs that made him feel like he’d been stabbed repeatedly. Dazed and increasingly alarmed, he lifted a hand to his lips when something trickled to his chin.

His fingers came back stained by blood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So… Oh no…! (whimpers) So NOW what? The baby seems to be getting way too much for Magnus’s body to handle.
> 
> Soooo… Thoughts? Comments? Rants…? PLEASE, do let me hear from you! It ALWAYS means the world to me.
> 
> NEXT UPDATE COMING NEXT MONDAY.
> 
> Until next time, folks! I REALLY hope that you’ll all join in for that one.
> 
> Take care!


	10. Choices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus's body has reached its limit. Alec and the others wait anxiously while Catarina tries to help him and the baby through it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY its time to post this chapter. Hooray…?
> 
> THANK YOU, from the bottom of my heart, for your absolutely amazing comments and all those listings! You have no idea how much they all mean to me. (HUUUUGS) You guys are AMAZING! I really hope that this story will live up to all your expectations.
> 
> Awkay… Are you ready? I’m not. BUT, I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride!

Magnus’s head spun and the pain in his stomach was so intense that it took all his willpower to think past it. To not let it sweep him under. Whenever he almost slipped he focused on the baby moving inside him. It gave him the extra spark he needed to keep hanging on.

Robert… was asking him things. What was going on… What to do…

Magnus gritted his teeth and forced himself to speak through the agony. “… Catarina … Call her…” He cast a pleading look towards the grandfather of his unborn child. “The baby…” _Help me keep her safe, please!_

Robert nodded slowly. Under different circumstances the wide-eyed, panicked look on the experienced Shadowhunter’s face might’ve seemed comical. “Alright, alright.” Slowly and hesitantly the man supported him with one arm. “You should… You need to sit down, right? Let’s get you to the couch.”

Honestly? Magnus didn’t want to move even a single step. But his options were to collapse to the floor or to try and make it to where he could sit comfortably, so there wasn’t any real choice. Slowly and almost carefully Robert led the pained warlock to the couch. As soon as they reached it Magnus slumped, barely conscious by the time he landed. A fresh fit of coughs seemed to tear his very insides to shreds and the taste of blood filling his mouth only made things worse.

How bad was the internal bleeding this time?

Magnus’s mind wasn’t present enough to do a lot of worrying after that. Once he was down no amount of adrenaline seemed to be enough to fight the exhaustion creeping on him. He even forgot about Robert. Almost.

Magnus blinked sluggishly, wondering when he closed his eyes. Through a lot of blur he saw Robert talking to a phone and pacing. Was he calling Catarina? Magnus wasn’t able to pay the slightest bit of attention to the conversation.

With the last of his strength Magnus tapped on the beautiful, metallic bracelet around his left wrist. It was simple yet elegant, decorated by a silvery Love Rune. Catarina had given him and Alec identical ones as engagement gifts. And, as she’d immediately explained, they were more than just pieces of jewelry. Since it was unclear when the baby would be born and the pregnancy was a risky one, the bracelets functioned as an emergency communication system.

Magnus felt a faint, comforting warm glow against his wrist before his consciousness fled.

/

Alec was observing Clary interrogating Jonathan when he felt it. Seemingly harmless warmth against his wrist. A faint pulsating sensation. Cold shivers shot down his spine, which instantly went rigid.

Magnus was calling for help.

Beside him Jace tensed up. Visibly bracing himself for something very unpleasant. “Alec?”

Alec swallowed. Hyper aware of every single twitch of the bracelet. “Magnus and the baby… Something’s wrong. I have to go.” He nodded tersely towards where Jonathan was clearly starting to get to Clary. “You keep an eye on them.”

Jace nodded. Then opened his mouth, only to come to a very accurate realization that no words of comfort would’ve made the current situation better. “Let me know as soon as you know anything, okay?”

Later Alec had no idea if he responded before sprinting away. He didn’t even think about trying to call Magnus. His fiancé would’ve called if he was able to.

Home, he needed to go home…!

That frantic thought-mantra was cut abruptly while he was passing by the Institute’s infirmary. The usually calm area was bustling with nervous energy and voices. Izzy’s growl carried above all others. “… some space, right now, or I’m filing an official report. Understood?”

Four people Alec recognized with little interest as Clave officials left the space with evident reluctance. His sister didn’t let her stone hard, borderline hostile posture relax the slightest bit until she could be absolutely sure that they were far enough. Alec himself tensed up anew when he noticed his father standing there, appearing uncomfortable and conflicted. All else, however, escaped his attention when he saw Magnus. A medical team Catarina ordered around seemed to be prepping the unconscious man for some sort of a procedure. 

Alec was there in a blink of an eye. (He never even noticed how Izzy registered him with eyes that were as sad as relieved. “I was just about to call you…”) “What happened?” he managed with immense difficulty, interrupting her.

“He seemed fine, until he started coughing up blood”, Robert explained quietly.

Alec might’ve lashed out violently if Catarina hadn’t cut in. “It’s internal bleeding again. This one’s… worse than those before.” If the look on her face was any indication, a lot worse. She already seemed strained and exhausted. “It was a lucky thing that Magnus wasn’t alone when this happened.” She gave him a sad, sympathy filled look. “Look… Right now there’s frustratingly little I can tell you and I have to get back to stabilizing Magnus. So I need you all to step back to the waiting area. Alright?”

Alec understood. Of course he did. Which didn’t mean that he would’ve liked being pushed aside while the one he loved more than anything fought for his life, with their child inside him.

He wished there wouldn’t have been so much audience. As it was he did his best to pretend that the others didn’t exist while he grabbed Magnus’s limp hand in his. First he gave it a tender squeeze, then brushed the knuckles gently with his fingers. (‘ _I love you. Please, hold on. Stay with me._ ’)

Alec panicked briefly when he noticed that his fiancé’s engagement ring was missing. Until Catarina began to lead him away and he felt her slip something to his palm. So subtly that no one else noticed. “He wouldn’t trust it to anyone else for safekeeping”, she whispered before speaking so that others would hear. “I’ll fill you in as soon as I know anything, okay?” There was the slightest crack on her professional facial expression. It wasn’t much, but enough to reveal to Alec that he wasn’t the only one scared. It helped him feel a little less alone, even when doors closed between him and his whole world.

All of a sudden Alec felt incredibly useless, just standing there. Crushed and struck breathless by the knowledge that there was nothing he could do. He wrung his hands, over and over again, until the skin around his fingers was turning red and sore.

“Alec.” Izzy lay a hand on his shoulder, making him freeze and go painfully tense. “We both know that there won’t be any news for a while. Take a walk. Blow off some steam. And come back when you don’t seem like you may explode any given second.”

Alec didn’t want to take even a single step further. But he knew that his sister was right. His useless hands needed something to do before he might do something he’d regret. “If something happens…”

“… you’ll be the first to know.” Izzy gave him her best supportive smile. “Pinkie swear.”

Alec’s brows furrowed. “What’s a pinkie swear?”

/

Robert waited until Alec was out of earshot. And after that he ensured that there were no Clave members anywhere near them before raising his voice. “Your brother is in no state of mind to listen to me right now. So I need you to.” He clenched his jaw. “I visited Magnus today to warn him about something.”

Considering how powerful and respected he once was, it was somewhat humiliating to reveal how little of the potential threat Robert knew. There was a file, and he’d noticed that his family had been under a suspicious amount of attention recently. The Clave had been a massive part of his life for as long as he could remember. It was haunting to imagine that it, or some members of it, might want harm of his grandchild and son. But after Aldertree’s little project was unraveled… Robert had no idea what to believe in anymore.

He chose to believe in his daughter.

Izzy’s eyes flashed while her warrior’s instincts activated. “If I had my way, Magnus would be whisked away from here immediately. But both he and the baby need medical care, right now, and we can’t take him to a mundane hospital. So for now we’ll have to settle for the Institute and keep a close eye on everything.” She breathed sharply. “Although I doubt they’d do whatever they’re planning on doing yet. They can't afford risking her.”

Robert’s entire trail of thought froze, there. His fingers, which had been drumming, stilled. “’Her’?”

“Yeah.” Despite the grim circumstances a brief smile flashed on Izzy’s face. “Magnus says that he can feel it. And I don’t doubt him when it comes to these things.”

It all hit Robert like a truck. His oldest son, his first-born… While they’d been barely on speaking terms Alec had grown up from a self-doubting, closeted, angry and hurting boy to a man. From someone who was ashamed of himself to someone who’d found his place in the world and was completely at peace with himself. And the one who helped him get there wasn’t his own dad but another man, a Downworlder. The road wasn’t easy but Alec was happy, in love and about to start a family of his own.

All those growing pains… All those insecurities… Alec conquered them without him, because he was too blinded by his own views to see that this was his own son needing him. He wasn’t going to let Alec down again. He was going to be there for his child now, come what may.

“Dad?”

Robert wiped his eyes. “I’m alright. Just… Realizing how much I’ve missed out on.”

/

Alec kept beating a punching bag until he realized that it wasn’t going to be enough. Not when his thoughts kept straying to Magnus every other second and came up with the most horrible scenarios. Eventually the sheer weight of… everything proved to be too much. He slumped to the floor and sat there, unable to find the strength and will to get up. The whole time he couldn’t stop rubbing at the bracelet that was identical to Magnus’s. All of him longed to feel something, anything. Because even if it would’ve meant bad news at least it would’ve been a connection with his fiancé.

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been sitting there when he felt a presence. Moments later Jace sat down beside him. “I get it if you’d rather be alone”, his parabatai started with. “But, based on experience… I think you could use company.”

Alec swallowed thickly. He refused to look towards his brother, because any amount of eye-contact might’ve shattered what little self-control he had left. “I don’t want to talk.”

Jace shrugged. “Then we don’t have to talk.” Simple as that.

Jace’s silent support worked better than any amount of physical exercise. Eventually Alec was able to breathe close to normally. He even almost managed to convince himself that perhaps everything would be okay.

Until Catarina walked into the training room, with the kind of a look on her face that stilled Alec’s heart for several seconds.

/

The Clave tried to be subtle. But the Shadowhunters and a vampire gathered to the waiting area could tell that they were under watch. “I wonder what name they’ve got for whatever project this is”, Simon muttered.

Clary shook her head in disgust and disbelief. “I don’t want to even imagine what they may be planning. Let’s just…” She took a deep breath, struggling visibly with an outburst that would’ve been caused by the toxic bond Lilith forced on her. She scratched her hands so hard that it left marks. “They’ll be okay. Let’s focus on that.”

Simon wrapped an arm around her. It took a moment. But eventually she relaxed against him. And wished that her life was still as simple as it was when she only dreamed of studying art.

All of a sudden new tension filled the room when the infirmary’s doors sighed open. A shudder crossed Clary’s whole body when she took in the look on Catarina’s face. The fast dawning horror intensified when she focused on Jace, who sauntered behind the warlock, wiping his eyes.

What was going on?

Catarina took a deep, steadying breath. Because this wasn’t just a nurse doing her duty. “Alec… asked me to tell you for him. Because he thought you should know what’s going on.”

“Things… don’t look good, do they?” Robert asked quietly.

Catarina shook her head, her eyes growing moist. “Alec would’ve shared the news himself, but… I just had to tell him that even with any existing magic, even with all the Institute has to offer… We can only stall the inevitable. Because… The baby is growing so quickly that Magnus’s body just can’t take it anymore.”

The silence was deafening. Simon cut it barely audibly. “What?”

Catarina gulped and inhaled a shuddering breath. “So, Alec’s in there, trying to decide. The baby… She may be ready for this world, or not. Is he going to risk his daughter by forcing her to be born now? Or is he going to risk Magnus’s life by waiting? Whatever he chooses… There’s a great chance that we’ll lose one of them.”

/

In a private space away from prying eyes, Alec clutched at Magnus’s hand desperately. Unshed tears shining in his eyes. Hard as he tried, he couldn’t really grasp on the full horror of what was going on.

At the moment Magnus was stable. Sedated to ensure that he was as comfortable as possible, to keep shock and pain from getting too much. The borderline catastrophic internal bleeding had been taken care of. But the peace was only fleeting.

Magnus’s body couldn’t handle the strain of carrying their little girl, and she very likely wasn’t ready to enter the world yet.

The first tear rolled. Alec didn’t even notice. His hand trembled when it squeezed Magnus’s, then traveled to the older man’s abdomen. The swell was still very small but noticeable to a careful eye. A sign that a new life was trying to grow inside it.

“Please…!” Alec pleaded. His voice was hoarse and full of sheer despair. “Please, don’t make me choose…!”

Alec wondered which one was worse – facing the impossible decision, or to have nothing left to choose from.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo… Who feels ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE for Alec? (sniffles and lifts both hands) And Magnus, too, of course. DANG…! See, this is why I told you to draw strength from the softer chapter…!
> 
> On a lighter note… Clave, you’re being obvious. (smirks)
> 
> Thoughts? Comments? Rants…? Bring it on, and PLEASE, do let me hear from you! Your comments ALWAYS mean the world to me.
> 
> (IF everything goes according to my plans) NEXT CHAPTER COMING ON THURSDAY 
> 
> Until next time! I really hope that I’ll see you all there.
> 
> Take care!


	11. Lullaby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec struggles with the impossible decision. Until fate decides to tear control from his hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This… was difficult to write. So, you can safely assume that the ‘PAIN’ part of this story isn’t quite over yet. (winces) But, before unleashing this chapter on you… 
> 
> THANK YOU, a million times, for your ABSOLUTELY AMAZING comments, love and support! You have no idea how much it means to me that you’re out there, eager to read more. (HUGS) I REALLY hope that what’s to come won’t disappoint, either.
> 
> Awkay… Are you SURE you’re ready? Because here we go. I really hope that you’ll enjoy the ride.

Of all Maryse’s children, Alec was always the one who asked for the least. Even as a small child he didn’t come to her for hugs, attention and comfort. He was the stereotypical first child. He always took care of himself, never once asking anyone to care for him and always carrying the weight of everyone’s world on his shoulders. It was no wonder he became so very serious. (Until Magnus Bane taught him how to smile.) And as a mother it tore her heart to shreds, wanting to be there for her child but never knowing when he needed her.

Even during what had to be the worst time of his whole life Alec still didn’t ask for anyone’s support. Fortunately Izzy had never been afraid of meddling when she felt it was necessary. ‘ _You need to come to the Institute. It’s Magnus and the baby._ ’ Those words were more than enough to push Maryse to motion.

It was… strange to enter the Institute after she’d been deruned and deemed an outcast amongst people who once respected her. But that day she spared all that no thought. Everything she could focus on was at the infirmary.

Her heart broke at how surprised Alec looked to see her. “Mom?” He wiped his eyes, which were suspiciously red. “What… What are you doing here?”

Maryse gave him a sad smile. “My son needs me. Where else would I be?”

Maryse couldn’t remember a time when Alec would’ve initiated a hug. Had he ever? But that awful day he – a tall, fierce soldier and leader – closed the distance between them so quickly that it took her by surprise. And broke down in her arms like he never had before.

Once Alec had pulled himself together a little he told her the whole thing. How quickly the baby was growing… What it was doing to Magnus… “I… I know what Magnus would want me to choose.” For the first time since his childhood Alec sounded every bit as young as he truly was. And incredibly lost. “But… I can’t… Mom, I can’t lose him. I can’t lose either one of them.”

Maryse looked over her son’s shoulder to where Magnus lay unconscious. (It hurt to see the most vibrant person she’d ever met like that. It was even worse to know that it was a million times harder on Alec.) She wanted, more than anything, to swear to Alec that he wouldn’t have to choose or lose. But she didn’t want to give empty promises. So instead she simply held on to him, offered him a moment when someone else was strong for him for a change. And prayed that it was enough.

/

Two endlessly long days later the baby made the decision for Alec. He was about to doze off, drained from several sleepless nights, when he noticed something that chased away every trace of fatigue. Magnus’s whole abdominal area was spasming.

Catarina’s facial expression confirmed his fears before her atypically quiet voice did. “These are contractions. I first noticed them about ten hours ago but they’re a lot stronger now.” The grief and sympathy in her voice almost tore down what little control he had over his emotions. “Magnus has been given medication to stop them for hours, but… It doesn’t seem to be working.” She looked at him sadly. “All the physical and emotional stress Magnus has been through is too much. The baby wants to and needs to come out now.”

Alec’s heart was sent racing. He wasn’t supposed to become a dad officially this soon! There was supposed to be more time…! The baby wasn’t ready yet…!

_Oh, Angel…!_

The baby might not make it. This was it, what he’d been terrified of since finding out that the spark of life was there. They might lose the other one, too…!

“I… I need Magnus.” Alec was all too aware of how ridiculous he sounded. He looked at Catarina pleadingly and cut her oncoming protest short. “If it’s…” He cleared his throat when his voice broke. “If you think Magnus can handle it, just… Just five minutes… I need to talk to him. Because… If he wakes up, unable to feel any sort of magic or a baby inside him…” He trailed off, but it wasn’t like he had to finish for his point to come across. If his fiancé would wake up unable to feel those two things to a world where their little girl was gone… Without getting the chance to say goodbye… It’d be an emotional blow the man wouldn’t recover from.

Catarina sighed heavily, her shoulders slumping. “I don’t like this”, she admitted. “However… I think you’re right. He needs to know what’s going on. But just a few minutes, alright?”

Alec nodded, too choked up for words.

Catarina’s hands worked their gentle magic. For a long while they were both quiet, deep in thought. “He’ll feel the contractions just enough to realize that something’s wrong, but he shouldn’t be in pain.” That was at least a tiny bit of relief. Moments later she was done. “I’ll leave you two alone. But call me if either of you needs anything.”

Once again Alec could only nod. He didn’t trust his voice enough to offer even a simple ‘thank you’. He could only take a deep breath and try to prepare himself for another unfair battle.

/

Magnus felt like he’d been sleeping and dreaming for a very long time. Those dreams – of Alec, of happy days – were so good that he was almost disappointed when consciousness began to sneak back. He gave away his half-awake state with a sigh.

“Magnus?” Why did Alec seem so blurry? “Can you hear me?”

Magnus attempted to respond but his head was too fuzzy to process words. Everything was so bright… “There you are”, Alec’s voice echoed in his head. Magnus had no idea where, exactly, that ‘there’ was.

Magnus’s brows furrowed while he turned his head. Where did Alec go? Was it another dream? “Alec?” he tried to call out, but wasn’t sure if it was anywhere close to comprehensible.

He almost panicked until a calloused but gentle hand guided his head towards the right direction. This time there was no blur in his line of vision while he looked at Alec. A tiny smile made its way to his lips. “There you are.”

Alec smiled back. But those eyes… They were so sad… “Yeah.”

Magnus would’ve tried to sit up. But his whole body was so heavy and weary that he barely had enough energy to stay awake. “What happened?” he demanded. Because something was definitely badly wrong.

Tension oozed from Alec. “Our daughter… Your body isn’t able to handle the pregnancy any longer.” The Shadowhunter swallowed and looked away, clearly wrestling to keep himself together for him. “I’m… not sure if you can feel it. Catarina said you probably will. You’ve gone into labor.” Alec’s voice broke until it faded away. “Our daughter, she… She’ll be born today. It can’t be stopped.”

Magnus felt like all blood in his veins had been transformed to ice-water. He shook his head, a frantic hand flying to his barely existent bump. “She can’t…! Alexander, she isn’t ready yet…!” He felt it, with every single cell in his body.

The sheer agony Alec wasn’t able to disguise revealed that he knew as much. “Catarina and the medical team, they…” The archer cleared his throat. “They have everything ready to give her the best fighting chance.”

Magnus wanted to break down crying and screaming. And he wanted to feel the baby move, just to know that she was still there, fighting for now. But she was still. The cramping motions he was slowly becoming aware of revealed that she wouldn’t be safe inside him for much longer.

Of all his numerous failures over his centuries long existence, this was the worst.

/

Magnus grew so quiet that it scared Alec. He would’ve asked if his fiancé was alright but knew better than well that neither of them was. He would’ve offered soothing words but they all tasted so sour and hollow that they refused to roll off his tongue. So he got up from the chair he’d occupied and joined his beloved on the bed instead. He curled himself around his whole world the best as he could although it was much too late to shield it from the horror of what was happening. And held on with all his might.

The humming was so silent that at first Alec thought he imagined it. Until he began to distinguish words that were practically breathed out in a language he couldn’t understand. A bit too slowly it dawned on him that Magnus was singing.

Listening to it hurt, so much that Alec could barely breathe. He gritted his teeth to not beg Magnus to stop. If this was what his fiancé needed, then he’d let him have this. Anything to take away even a fraction of the agony.

Alec must’ve drifted deep into his own thoughts. Because all of a sudden the song was over and Magnus was whispering softly. “My mother… She always sang me that lullaby when I was sad. The last time she sang it to me was hours before she…” The man couldn’t bring himself to finish. A sob, just one, broke out. It was painful to feel how hard Magnus fought to hold it back, to stay strong, to not break down. “It… It always made me feel better, safe and loved. And since this… This may be my only chance to sing her a lullaby, so I want her to feel the same.” The second sob was even more heart wrenching, because with it the warlock very nearly lost control entirely. “I’m not sure if I would’ve been any good as a parent, but… I would’ve tried my all. I would’ve loved her with all that I am, Alexander. I already do. I would’ve…” Magnus emitted a choked, whimpering sound. “At least, if I could’ve helped it, I would’ve never abandoned her.”

Tears filled Alec’s eyes while he kissed Magnus’s hair and tightened his embrace. “I know”, he murmured. “And she knows it, too.” Of that he was absolutely certain. There was no way their daughter could’ve possibly doubted how deeply she was adored. He lay his hand on top of Magnus’s, which rested against the man’s abdomen. He hoped from the bottom of his breaking heart that their little girl felt them. “She knows how much we love her. That’s why she’s still fighting.”

Magnus clung to his hand with all the strength the man had left, small tremors rocking his whole frame.

With how short of a while ago they found out about the pregnancy, the couple hadn’t given the baby’s birth a lot of thought. They acknowledged that she’d have to come out eventually and left it at that. Considering the current circumstances, a cesarean seemed like the only option. But as it turned out the baby had her own birth plan.

Magnus was trembling in his arms when Alec smelled something that brought chills down his spine. Blood. His heart hammering a million miles per hour, the Shadowhunter shifted the comforter to find red staining his fiancé’s hospital gown and the bedsheet.

Catarina swore loudly when she inspected the situation. (The examination was horrible to witness. Any other day Magnus would’ve been mortified to have his best friend checking his private parts. As it was he just lay there, tense, visibly pained and so still that Alec had to double-check to be sure that he was breathing.) “We’ll have to forget about the cesarean”, she announced gravely. “The contractions have created an… opening. And the baby’s coming fast. I can already see the head.”

/

Once again at the waiting area, Izzy observed from the corner of her eye how Clary held Jace’s hand supportively while Alec’s pain thrummed through the blonde. Jace accepted her touch eagerly, not even trying to keep a brave face in front of the redhead who was his world. Izzy knew that she was being unreasonable and stupid. But the sight tore at something inside her viciously.

As much as she hated the thought of all the pain love seemed to inevitably bring… It would’ve been nice to have someone holding her hand, too. Not that she would’ve ever admitted as much out loud. Isabelle Lightwood wasn’t the kind of a girl who needed someone to hold her hand.

When fingers unexpectedly began to lace through hers she slapped them out of instinct. Her reaction caused an immediate “Ouch!”. Simon made a face. “Some reflexes you’ve got there.”

Izzy did feel a little sorry. She smirked sheepishly. “Sorry about that.” She then frowned. “What were you doing, anyway?”

“I… thought it was pretty obvious.” Simon shrugged. “I kind of need someone to hold my hand for five minutes.” Of course they both knew who he was really trying to do this for.

Izzy hesitated for a second. Then took the hand she just attacked. After some consideration she leaned her head against his shoulder. Just to try it out, this once. (She found that it felt… pretty nice.) “Fine. Four minutes.”

“Deal.”

/

There were far more people in the room than Alec was comfortable with. Setting equipment, trying to help Magnus and their little girl. The Shadowhunter held his beloved’s hand, anxious to offer whatever support he could.

Magnus fought like a true warrior. Pushed and pushed when he should’ve ran out of strength a long time ago, sweat covering his forehead and tears running down his cheeks. At first the process was aided by the fact that magic and medication kept him from feeling much of the pain. But when it was time to squeeze out the head and shoulders, nothing was enough to dull the agony.

Magnus screamed at the top of his voice, eyes squeezed tightly shut and clutching at Alec’s hand like it was his lifeline.

Alec could barely bear watching it. But he remained where he was firmly, adamant to not leave or break down when the love of his life needed him the most. He kissed Magnus’s hand lovingly because it was all he could do. “You’re doing great”, he praised hoarsely. He sounded like he’d been screaming, too. “Just a little longer, okay? Then it’s over.” _Hang on, hang on, please hang on…!_

It was impossible to tell if Magnus heard his soothing words. Because the whole thing truly was almost over, which meant that it was time for the hardest part. The baby’s shoulders were achingly small but possibly too wide for Magnus’s already strained and exhausted body to handle. The pain was very visibly overwhelming.

“Listen to Alec”, Catarina interjected. Her voice was uncharacteristically sharp and tight. “You’ve got this. Just a little more.”

Magnus nodded, jaw clenching from agony and determination. Somehow, impossibly, the drained man managed to draw a little more strength from somewhere. “Alec…!” he cried out, before howling loudly. The archer didn’t think he’d forget that horrible sound for as long as he’d live.

After that terrible noise it became almost terrifyingly quiet. Magnus moaned once in a way that would’ve shattered just about anyone’s heart, then panted from effort to catch the breath he lost. Alec panted as well, a distant part of his brain wondering how long he’d been holding his breath. Their daughter… She didn’t make a sound.

Catarina operated swiftly. With steady, sure hands she began to coax life into the limp little one. “Come on, sweetheart”, she cooed quietly. “Take a breath for me and your parents.” Was she giving CPR…? “Come on…”

Magnus squeezed Alec’s hand harder than ever before. There was a crushing amount of despair in the warlock’s eyes. “Alexander, go to her, please.” It was incredible how forceful something so quiet managed to be.

Alec couldn’t stand even the thought of stepping away from Magnus. But he also needed to get to their little girl. He kissed the other’s cheek before whispering in his ear. “You did so well. I’m so proud of you.”

Magnus said nothing to that, and Alec could only hope that his words were heard and taken to heart.

Alec felt unsteady on his feet while making his way to where Catarina was slowly giving up on trying to revive the baby. Seeing the child’s bluish lips… (Their shape was just like Magnus’s…!) Recognizing the familiar features… (And that was his nose…!) It was almost too much. “Can I hold her?” He could barely hear his own voice and wondered if it was because his aching heart was pounding so loudly.

Catarina nodded, tears in her eyes. The newborn was frighteningly small and so fragile that Alec was scared of touching her. But when he had her in his arms… She fit there perfectly.

And something clicked into place.

So suddenly that Alec was startled that child shuddered. Then gasped. After a torturously long pause she fought in another breath. And another, after an even longer pause. She didn’t have enough strength to open her eyes, let alone cry. But she was alive. That realization was overwhelming enough to almost bring Alec to his knees.

As it was the baby and attempts to save her life claimed everyone’s attention. Which was why no one noticed that something else had happened. On the bed Magnus’s eyes had slipped closed at the same moment the child took her first breath, and he’d gone still.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I should start running for my life… (smirks sheepishly) (then whimpers) Hang in there, Lightwood-Bane family!  
> Sooo… Was that any good, at all? PLEASE, do let me know! And if you want to rant… Let it all out! I can take it. (I think…)
> 
> IN THE NEXT ONE: Desperate to not lose his world, Alec breaks a promise.
> 
> NEXT UPDATE COMING NEXT MONDAY.
> 
> Until next time! I really hope that I’ll see you all there.
> 
> Take care!


	12. Aku Cinta Kamu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things go from bad to worse. And eventually Alec has no other choice but to break a promise…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m back from hiding. To post you another chapter that may make things better… or way, WAY worse. (smirks evilly) (then dodges thrown objects)
> 
> Before getting to the actual chapter, though… You guys SERIOUSLY continue to surprise me. All those comments, all that love… You have NO IDEA how happy you make me! (HUGS) I really hope that what’s to come won’t disappoint, either.
> 
> Okay… Are you ready? Are you sure? Because here we go. I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride!
> 
> Remember that Clave-spy from earlier chapters? In this chapter she makes a return no one wanted...
> 
> (The chapter title already gives creeps, doesn’t it…? Those words never seem to mean anything good when associated with Malec.)

She was alive. His and Magnus’s daughter… She was still alive, fighting tooth and nail to stay that way. The realization brought some tears to Alec’s eyes and a small, nearly hysterical chuckle bubbled through his lips. “Magnus, she… She’s perfect”, he barely managed.

All too soon the medical team took the baby from Alec’s arms. And although he knew, better than well, that it was all vital he very nearly… well, lost it. Entirely.

He couldn’t let them put her into an incubator when he wanted to hold her and never let go…! 

The sight that was simultaneously incredibly beautiful and harrowing transfixed Alec to a point where he became blind and deaf to everything else. Until Catarina’s voice broke through the haze filling his head. “Magnus? Hey, eyes open! Magnus!”

His knees growing weak and unsteady, Alec dashed to the bed. Horrified to see how pale, still and almost lifeless his fiancé had gone. “What happened?” He only looked away for a little while…!

Catarina clenched her jaw while examining her best friend. “I’m not sure”, she admitted reluctantly. “Could be just the physical strain…” She trailed off. In a matter of seconds Alec figured out why.

There was so much blood on the bed’s lower parts that it was dripping to the floor in big, fat drops.

Sheer terror struck through Alec like a bolt of lightning. He couldn’t look away from the blood, no matter how much he wanted to. “Oh, god…!”

Catarina got to work without a second’s hesitation, even though he could see how tired she was. The alarm in her eyes deepened while she swore under her breath. “The birth… caused a lot of tearing. But that’s not the only problem.” She gritted her teeth. “It looks like Magnus shared his strength with the baby. So much of it that I can barely feel him there.”

A flashback struck Alec with enough force to almost sweep him off his feet.

How he once shared his strength with Magnus to save Luke… Willing to give whatever the warlock needed… How in those moments they became one and shared something so intimate that Alec still couldn’t put it to words properly… How he already began to fall in love with Magnus then, no matter how little he wanted to admit it at the time…

And now, in a desperate attempt to save their daughter, Magnus gave her whatever he could.

“Alec.” At first his mind tricked him into believing that the voice belonged to Magnus. “Alec, look at me!” Until he managed to make himself glance away from all the red and found Jace’s face. “We need to let Catarina work. We need to let her focus.”

Even the thought of leaving the room… Of taking distance when those who meant the most to him needed him… It was unbearable. It took all Alec’s willpower. Not for the first time Magnus gave him the strength to do the impossible.

But not before he did just one more thing…

/

The moment he felt Alec’s agony and terror surge, Jace feared the absolute worst. And he swore to himself that he’d be strong, no matter what awaited. The pillar of support Alec needed, especially if… Well.

But the desolate sight in the room… A newborn struggling to breathe in an incubator, Magnus surrounded by far too much blood and Alec on the verge of a panic attack… Jace clenched his jaw and steeled himself for his brother’s little family.

He did look away, though, when Alec kissed Magnus’s forehead and whispered something to the unconscious man’s ear. He knew that he’d interrupted a regrettable amount of… private moments between the two. He wasn’t going to intrude on this one. (Which, he told himself fiercely, wasn’t the last.)

He didn’t guide Alec all the way to the waiting area, knowing how many people would’ve been there expecting news. People his parabatai was in no condition to face just yet. Instead they occupied two chairs just inside the massive infirmary’s doors.

A suffocating, heavy silence fell and lingered. In the end Jace couldn’t stand it anymore. “You don’t have to answer, but… What did you say to Magnus, before we left?” He hoped that he wasn’t crossing a line.

Alec tensed up visibly. For a while Jace was certain that he’d lash out. Instead something far more painful happened. Tears filled the archer’s eyes. “Aku cinta kamu.”

Jace frowned. “What does that mean?”

Alec could only shake his head, the emotional overload obviously getting too much to bear.

/

It had been a long, horrible day. And it seemed to be getting worse. Because despite Catarina’s best efforts Magnus’s bleeding wouldn’t stop. And she could actually feel his mind drifting further and further, no matter how hard she tried to reach it. It was like the fight to bring the baby into the world and giving her whatever chance to survive he could had taken Magnus’s all. She’d seen it happen to far too many patients. No matter how strong one’s will was, it was of no use if the body containing it decided that it couldn’t go on any longer.

The worst thing was that his sacrifice didn’t seem to be enough. The baby was as stubborn as her parents to have made it that far. But she’d entered the world far too soon. Her lungs and heart… They weren’t ready yet. She wasn’t ready yet. And even all Catarina’s magic couldn’t fix such a fundamental flaw.

Catarina stared at the papa and daughter, who were fighting futile wars to just hang on. (Her best friend. And a little girl whose god mom she’d been asked to be.) The injustice of it all made her want to scream and trash something. 

Instead Catarina locked herself to the nearest toilet, slumped to the floor and grabbed her hair so harshly that she almost pulled off strands. For exactly five minutes she cried, from the bottom of her heart and soul. Then composed herself forcibly, washed her face and emerged.

And braced herself for having to tell Alec that he’d probably lose his whole family today.

/

“… understand that this is a lot to take in …”

No, she didn’t. She couldn’t possibly have any idea. This was all Alec’s worst fears coming true. This was his everything falling to pieces, slipping away from him. And he realized that there was only one thing he could do to help.

“Can I…?” Alec cleared his throat when his voice broke. “Can I see them?”

Catarina nodded. “Of course.” She rubbed at her face with one hand, visibly exhausted. “I’ll ask you to step outside if necessary. But other than that, you can stay as long as you want to.”

For a second, just one, Alec almost slipped and revealed that he wasn’t planning on staying long.

Seeing Magnus and their daughter, both fighting for their lives and losing… It simultaneously broke Alec and strengthened his resolve. Because it served as both a reminder of how much he had to fight for, and of how impossible it would be to walk away from it all.

He gulped thickly while watching the baby. So incredibly tiny and lonely inside the incubator… “When I learned about you I… I swore to myself that I’d do anything for you. Because that’s… That’s what parents do.” Tears blurred his eyes when the little one who could barely breathe and wasn’t strong enough to open her eyes suddenly emitted a tiny mew and moved her arms. Clearly calling out to him and reaching out for him. “I love you. You and your papa… You two are my world. And… I’ll make sure that you’ll be okay. I promise.”

Turning away from her was nearly impossible. Facing Magnus… was something beyond that. Alec wanted to reach out for the hand that’d been stripped of the engagement ring. On the last moment he steeled himself and stopped, knowing that even the faintest touch would’ve made leaving impossible. “I… I’m so sorry. That I can’t keep the promise I gave you”, he whispered, looking at his fiancé’s unnaturally serene face. “You may never forgive me for this, but… I have to try. For you and our girl.”

Alec didn’t give a kiss goodbye. He refused to utter further words of affection. It would’ve felt too much like saying goodbye. Instead he gave the two loves of his life a look and used that to draw as much strength as he could. Then marched out of the infirmary, not daring to look back.

Izzy, Jace, Simon and Clary all seemed surprised when he invited them to his office. He didn’t give them the chance to ask before going first. “A while ago you summoned Lilith.”

“Yeah. We remember”, Jace affirmed slowly, seeming confused. Then grimaced. “If you want to berate us for that again…”

Alec shook his head. “I didn’t ask because I want to yell at you. I want to know if you think you can do it again, to summon another Greater Demon.”

/

Anastasia Angelmark had been a loyal spy for a small, top secret cell of the Clave for a long time. She delivered them a confirmation of Magnus’s pregnancy, followed by updates whenever she found out something. She considered making herself a part of Catarina’s medical team her greatest accomplishment yet.

Catarina seemed utterly drained and the warlock’s eyes were suspiciously red while she continued to work tireless to save Magnus and the child. Anastasia did her best to appear genuinely sympathetic when she offered the woman a mug. “I got you some coffee. The decent kind from across the street. I figured you’d need it.”

Catarina accepted her offering gratefully. “Thank you! You’re a lifesaver.” The warlock took a sip and Anastasia tensed up for a second, until she could be sure that nothing out of the ordinary had been detected.

Once she was out of the room Anastasia sent a message. ‘ _I ensured that Loss takes a break. The baby’s almost certainly dying and we’re running out of time. Two hours, at most, then I can finally take care of those tests and samples you asked for._ ’

/

Magnus drifted in a strange, grey hue. Feeling nothing, worrying about nothing. He wasn’t even concerned about the fact that he seemed to be… slipping away.

He’d given his all, and he just wanted to rest.

Until he felt something. A tug. Light as a feather but impossible to ignore. It was just enough to coax him out of the fog his mind had gotten lost into.

He forced his eyes half-open with a deep frown. For an infuriatingly long time everything was far too bright and blurry to make any sense. Until he caught a figure from the corner of his eye. He would’ve assumed that it was Alec if it wasn’t for the tingle of dread going down his spine. With a ridiculous amount of effort he turned his head slightly to see better.

A young Shadowhunter girl, dressed as a medic, was inspecting a baby in an incubator with her back towards him. (His baby. His and Alec’s baby.) She was holding a needle and tubes. The sight made every trace of fatigue and pain in Magnus’s body fade away, at least momentarily.

Magnus’s eyes flashed in a predatory manner. He had no idea who she was. But he knew, with the absolute certainty paternal instincts provided, that she had no business being anywhere near his child.

Adrenaline is a wondrous thing. With its aid Magnus crawled out of the bed, as quietly as a cat. His hazy but stubbornly open eyes wandered until locking on the nearest potential weapon. Which happened to be an IV pole.

His bare feet weren’t exactly steady, but by gritting his teeth he managed to hold back all sounds of discomfort. He never noticed the droplets of blood falling to mark his path. The girl didn’t have any idea what was coming until he was roughly a step away. She whirled around just in time to see a look of pure wrath on his face and to receive a vicious hit right at her head.

Magnus breathed hard and stared at her unconscious form on the floor. It took eight seconds before he was convinced that she’d stay down. Another two seconds later the IV pole clattered to the floor when adrenaline began to fade and he didn’t have the strength to hold it anymore. For five more seconds he fought, unsuccessfully, to focus on his daughter. Desperate to make sure that she was alright. But it seemed he’d used the last bits of strength he’d had left.

Magnus tried to tap on the bracelet connecting him and Alec. He needed his fiancé there to keep their daughter safe. He barely managed to brush the item with his fingertips before his knees buckled. Darkness swallowed him before he hit the floor.

/

Elsewhere the group was almost ready to try and summon Asmodeus when Alec shivered and frowned. Instinctively his hand flew to the bracelet but the warmth and pulsating he thought he felt were already gone. He must’ve imagined it. Magnus couldn’t have even been conscious to…

“Alec?” Izzy’s brows were furrowed while she studied him critically. “Are you okay?”

Of course Alec wasn’t. How could he have been? He nodded sharply. “Yeah. Let’s just get started.”

They were about to summon a Greater Demon. That wasn’t the scariest part. The most terrifying part was that Alec already knew that he wouldn’t regret it.

If he had to, he’d pay for the lives of Magnus and their child with his own.

/

Anastasia recovered from Magnus’s attack quickly. Still a little dizzy, she turned her head. Her eyes flashed upon spotting the man unconscious on the floor. Too stubborn for his own good. She’d heard people call Magnus that and at the moment understood where the reputation came from.

The need to repay his attack overruled her common sense. Quickly and stealthily her hand slid towards a blade hidden by her clothes. She wasn’t quite sure what she planned on doing before a man’s voice spoke. “I wouldn’t do that, if I were you.” Robert Lightwood’s eyes blazed hellfire. “How long did you imagine that you can sneak around, sending information to questionable sources, without being noticed? Especially after Aldertrees’s recent stunt we’re on a lookout for anything… questionable.”

Anastasia’s eyes narrowed while her heart began to pound. “You’re bluffing”, she hissed. “You don’t even have the kind of authorization to dig through my phone…”

“He doesn’t. But as the head of security, I do.” Underhill lifted his chin. “I got curious when I noticed that you’d been in frequent contact with several members of the Clave who have been on a watch-list. Consider the project you worked on shut down permanently.”

Everything happened in a blur after that. Anastasia was apprehended officially and taken away. Actual medical personnel swarmed around Magnus, working frantically to stabilize him. “Where’s Catarina Loss?” Robert demanded after a moment of shock. Wasn’t she supposed to be in charge?

“Already waiting at my mansion, making sure that everything’s ready.” Lorenzo Rey appeared as though out of thin air. The warlock’s whole aura oozed something that made Robert feel inexplicably uncomfortable. “As per my orders as the High Warlock, Bane and the baby will be transferred there immediately. Obviously the Institute isn’t a safe place for them right now.”

Robert frowned. He didn’t like this, at all. Where was Alec? “And you’re saying that they’d be safe with you?”

Lorenzo scoffed. “I’m the High Warlock of Brooklyn. As such, it’s my duty and a matter of pride to protect them.” The man took a loudly speaking, meaningful step closer. “Right now they’re dying. I have several warlocks with healing skills standing by, waiting for our arrival. And my mansion is protected by my wards. Are you going to keep wasting their time, or will you let me and my people try to save them?”

/

Alec’s heart pounded while they waited, bracing themselves for absolutely anything. The whole vast space around them filled with electricity. And then, with a puff of turquoise smoke and an angry hiss of air, a man appeared with a chilling smile on his face.

“Alexander Gideon Lightwood.” Asmodeus’s low voice was like a purr and a growl merged into one. “It took longer than I expected for you to invite me. You are as stubborn as my son.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooooooh boy… We were dreading that Alec would do that. And here we are… (groans and whimpers) What will happen to the little family next? Will they all survive this?
> 
> GO ON! How evil am I? Let me hear it, I can take it! Besides, hearing from you ALWAYS makes my day.
> 
> NEXT UPDATE COMING THIS THURSDAY.
> 
> Until next time! I REALLY hope that I’ll see you all there.
> 
> Take care!


	13. There’s Always a Price to Pay…

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asmodeus has been summoned and a contract is made. But with a demon everything comes at a price…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is everyone still alive after 3x19…? (whimpers) Because, it’s time for an update!
> 
> FIRST, though… THANK YOU, a million times, for all your comments, kudoses and love! You have NO IDEA how much your support means to me. (HUGS) I really hope that you’ll enjoy the chapters we have left!
> 
> Awkay… Are you ready? Because this chapter is going to be a quite hectic ride. Ready or not… Let’s go!

Alec held his breath while Asmodeus took a step forward. Then another before finally paying attention to the energy field that was supposed to restrain him. The Prince of Hell appeared amused more than anything else while waving his hand casually. (Using his magic in a fashion so similar to Magnus’s that Alec felt a stab of ache.) Metal flew with unnaturally loud clattering and the turquoise wall that was meant to be a cage fell with an angry hiss. “We’re meant to negotiate a contract, aren’t we? I’d much rather do so without that distracting thing.” Asmodeus tilted his head as he looked at Alec. “So you are the boy Magnus considers worth sacrificing his magic for.” Cat eyes flashed. “You already ruined my chosen son. That I’m suddenly here suggests that you have the nerve to demand something more from me.”

Alec’s eyes narrowed. He hated how those words got under his skin. “You know why I summoned you”, he hissed. “Magnus and the baby… They need you. Just like you ensured they would.”

Asmodeus shrugged. It was infuriatingly difficult to tell how he felt, or if he felt anything at all. (Suddenly Alec knew where Magnus’s flawless ‘I’m fine’ mask came from.) “I have my methods of persuasion.”

“And those methods include risking the lives of your son and grandchild?” Jace interjected.

Asmodeus reacted so quickly that none of the Shadowhunters or even the vampire present saw it coming. Jace gasped while red magic wrapped around his throat and the demon’s eyes narrowed. “You, Owl… are in no position to lecture me on how I educate my son.” For three more seconds the Prince of Hell squeezed, very visibly enjoying it. Then let go and hurled Jace at the nearest wall, like the young man was a toy he got bored of. Asmodeus approached Alec until only two steps separated them. “If we are to make a deal… I trust you understand that you must give me something in return.”

“Magnus mentioned that your help always comes at a price.” Alec worked his hardest to not lash out at the demon who had his family’s fate in his untrustworthy hands. “Name it.”

Asmodeus’s eyebrow bounced up. “Is there a price you wouldn’t be willing to pay?” Alec’s silence was a very loud answer and the man smirked. Knowing that he had the archer exactly where he wanted him. “I imagined as much.”

“I’d do anything for Magnus and our daughter”, Alec admitted out loud. Perhaps unwisely. “We love each other.”

Asmodeus’s smile was such only a fool would’ve trusted. “Today, Alexander… You will show me how much you mean that.” The demon scoffed when Izzy, Jace, Clary and Simon braced themselves for a fight. “Oh, don’t be ridiculous. If I wanted you dead, you would be dead by now. And I have no desire to stay up here any longer than necessary.” A pair of once again dark eyes went to Izzy and studied her with open admiration. (Which made Alec take an instinctive protective step towards his sister. Simon revealed his fangs and hissed.) “Although certain mortals can be… fascinating.”

Alec might’ve lost his cool disastrously. Done something stupid. If his phone didn’t receive a message just then. It was from his father. He frowned at the words. Then, understanding dawning, froze.

‘ _I’m about to follow Lorenzo Rey to his mansion with Magnus and the baby. Get there quickly. I don’t have the authorization to stop this and something’s wrong._ ’

“We have to go. Now”, he somehow managed to squeeze out. That ghost-like, barely-there pulsating of the bracelet he felt a short while ago… So it was real…! _Oh, god…!_ If something would happen to his beloved and their daughter because he was too preoccupied by summoning Asmodeus… He’d never forgive himself.

/

Starting to follow Lorenzo through a portal, Robert could only hope that Alec would get his message before it might be too late. The seasoned Shadowhunter felt infuriatingly lot like a prey that was being chased towards a waiting trap. And he had no other choice but to play his part. Because while he fought uselessly to stop this transfer the Clave authorized, Lorenzo got his hands on the baby. The warlock held Robert’s granddaughter like she was his personal human shield, and the sight was more than enough to make the man see red. He might’ve taken a possibly ridiculous risk if it was just the little one needing protection. But there was also Magnus, who hadn’t even stirred since he was found from the floor. A Clave member was pushing the gurney the currently defenseless warlock had been placed on.

His son’s family needed him and there was maddeningly little he could do to get them out of the mess.

As it turned out Robert was even more useless than he’d imagined. Because on the last second Lorenzo turned towards him. “Your participation won’t be necessary.” Magic was glowing before that sentence had been completed.

The portal slammed closed right in front of Robert’s nose.

/

Alec already loathed Lorenzo’s mansion during the awful ‘passing the torch’ party. His feelings didn’t grow sweeter when he glared at the place that day, knowing that his dying daughter and fiancé were there. Especially when there was a wall of wards keeping him from getting to them.

Asmodeus scoffed, as though personally offended. The demon muttered something that sounded like an insult under his breath. Now, Alec had seen how challenging it was to break through a warlock’s ward during the nightmare of Magnus and Valentine switching bodies. Asmodeus demolished all Lorenzo’s shields with an impatient snap of fingers.  
Alec felt a bout of satisfaction, as much as he tried to tell himself that he didn’t, and then all hell broke loose.

Clave members were closing in on them. “I’m afraid that you don’t have the authorization to be here”, one of them announced. “Bane and the child…”

Alec broke the younger man’s jaw with a single blow of his fist, and didn’t feel the slightest bit guilty. In fact… It was so satisfying that it sickened him.

There was no need for weapons. Alec swung his fist, kicked, and the man who tried to stop him fell to the floor in a graceless heap. Another attacked came almost immediately. This opponent proved to be slightly more bothersome, because the older man came at him bearing blades the archer didn’t waste time on trying to identify. Alec obtained a few bruises in the raging fight that ensued, and at some point he realized that his shoulder was bleeding. There was so much adrenaline in his body that he didn’t feel any pain. Only rage.

(Alec didn’t see the look of satisfaction on Asmodeus’s face at the sight of his attack, before the man walked away while everyone was too preoccupied to stop him.)

Alec’s fist went down, again and again. Someone was shouting. “Alec, STOP! You’re scared, angry and overwhelmed, but you’ll regret this!” The echo of Jace’s worry and shock worked as effectively as a bucket of ice water. “Alec, stop!”

Alec breathed hard, his eyes wide and wild, feeling sick to his stomach. His fist was still raised as he stared at the unconscious man he’d been pummeling. A few more punches and he would’ve…

“Alec?” Simon’s voice wasn’t exactly welcomed. But it was a much-needed distraction. The vampire’s eyes were full of sorrow. “They… They had her on a table. I don’t know what they were doing to her, but… I can barely hear her heartbeat.”

In Simon’s arms was his little girl, limp and silent.

/

“… rina…? Catarina!”

Catarina groaned, then began to wrestle her eyes open. What happened? She remembered feeling ridiculously tired, even more so after coffee… The realization hit her like a pile of bricks.

The coffee… It was drugged with a sedative. Someone wanted her out of the way.

Her eyes flew open. Infuriatingly slowly she concluded that she was on a bed inside one of the Institute’s breakrooms. She had vague memories of climbing to that bed, exhausted and unable to think.

“Catarina?” Robert Lightwood’s eyes were full of stress and panic. “Lorenzo took Magnus and the baby to his mansion. I know that he’s the High Warlock, but… Something’s wrong. And five minutes ago Alec sent me a message that he’s on the way there with Asmodeus. So that’s where I’m going, too, but… I could use a warlock for a backup.”

Under different circumstances the man who used to consider all Downworlders beneath him admitting to needing her would’ve made her laugh. As it was she gawked, wondering if she was getting any of his words right. Hoping that she wasn’t. “What?”

/

Lorenzo entertained the thought of healing Magnus, briefly. Until he remembered how the older warlock once attacked him. Until it occurred to him that this was his chance to get rid of the man whose fame, popularity and reputation had haunted him all his life. This was his chance to ensure that soon Magnus would be nothing but a memory.

And the most satisfying part was that he didn’t have to do anything. Magnus was still bleeding. Still fading away. All Lorenzo had to do was to stand there and watch fate take its inevitable course. If anyone would ask anything, later… He’d be able to shrug and state that at least he tried but Clave interfered. After all, they already messed up once with Anastasia. (He couldn’t believe that the Nephilim actually considered themselves superior.) 

Lorenzo stretched lazily. He didn’t exactly lie to Robert upon claiming that he had warlocks with healing abilities at his disposal. And they would be there, soon. Just a little too late, if the way he felt Bane’s feeble grasp on life slipping was any indication.

The dying warlock seemed so… different without his makeup, with his hair unstyled. The magnificent Bane appeared astonishingly young, breakable. Lorenzo tilted his head. “Oh, how the mighty have fallen…”

“I would say the same thing about you, but we both know that there’s nothing mighty about you.”

Lorenzo shuddered from startle and spun around. Cold filled him as he stared at the Greater Demon in front of him. “You’re… How are you here?”

“My son and grandchild need me. Where else do you imagine I would be?” Asmodeus took a slow step closer. Cat eyes studied him intently. “Your jealousy of Magnus… It’s eating away your very soul. I can feel it. Perhaps I can provide some relief.” The demon lifted his hand. Blue magic was dancing on it. “This… is what you envy the most. Isn’t it? Magnus’s magic. His powers.”

“Yes”, Lorenzo confessed in a hiss, his eyes locked on the glowing, pulsating blue.

“Then allow me to give you a taste.” Asmodeus smiled in a way almost anyone would’ve been wise enough to not trust. “I’m sure that you’re aware of the risks. But if you so wish, I can give you a small portion of it. Just a taste.”

Lorenzo didn’t question the offer. Didn’t even hesitate. Instead he nodded eagerly. “I can take it. Give it to me.” He would’ve wanted to say so much more but couldn’t.

Asmodeus nodded. “Very well.” And then the blue energy was flowing into his body.

It felt… incredible. Like he’d had several thunderbolts inside him. Until… Until…

It got too much very quickly. The electricity hissed and sizzled under his skin, protesting violently against being placed into his body. Still, despite the new power snarling at him to not tempt it, Lorenzo snapped his fingers to obtain a glass of martini. A few savoring sips later he gasped while his ears started ringing painfully, his head began to pound and a trickle of blood meandered from his nose. “I… I can’t… Take it a… away…!”

Less than five minutes with Bane’s magic and it was tearing him to pieces – the humiliation would kill him if nothing else would…!

Asmodeus lifted his chin, golden eyes blazing. “Your body isn’t equipped for handling such strong magic. It’s almost poetic, isn’t it? The thing you’ve desired the most… It’s going to be the end of you.”

Asmodeus watched with calmness, thrill, curiosity and immense satisfaction how Lorenzo struggled. A few minutes later the warlock was coughing up blood. Almost right after he fell to the floor, seizing. Shortly thereafter Lorenzo’s heart stopped and he wasn’t breathing anymore. The donated and rejected magic flew back to Asmodeus’s outstretched hand and settled with a tingle of fury.

“Envy is one of the Deadly Sins for a reason.” Asmodeus tilted his head as he watched the dead body. Cat eyes revealed. “Consider your lesson learned.”

The corpse lost its appeal quickly. Asmodeus’s eyes regained their glamour while they drifted to Magnus. His boy was so very still and lifeless…

Moving gracefully, Asmodeus sat to the edge of the bed. Then pulled Magnus to his chest and closed his eyes. “Your Shadowhunter gave in and summoned me. Just as I predicted. I’m here for you, my son”, he whispered. And pressed his hand against the warlock’s temple before letting magic flow. “I will always be right here.”

/

Holding his daughter… Feeling her barely hanging on to life… It shattered Alec in a way nothing ever had before.

Was her heart even beating anymore…?

“Alec.” Izzy’s voice was barely able to pull him out of the haze. Her eyes were dark from too many emotions while she fought one of the Clave members. “Go. We’ll handle this.”

Alec didn’t need to be told twice. He ran, with the speed of despair. Straight towards the Prince of Hell who made the child in his arms possible. But also ensured with his tricks that he’d be needed unless the archer wanted to lose his family. Asmodeus was the last person he should’ve gone to for help, but also his only hope.

When Alec reached the correct room he froze by the doorway. The first thing he noticed was the dead body of Lorenzo Rey. Slowly, slowly, he turned his head to see something far more harrowing. Watching Asmodeus holding Magnus… It made him feel sick. “What are you doing to him?”

Asmodeus gave him a dry look, finally letting go of his son. For some reason the sight of the demon laying a still unconscious Magnus down gently was unsettling. “Only what you asked me to do. I’m saving his life.” A pair of keen eyes locked on the practically lifeless baby in his arms. “Now will you let me save my granddaughter as well?”

Everything in Alec screamed against it. But his little girl probably wasn’t breathing anymore, and the beat of life in her chest seemed to be gone. And he couldn’t…! Angel help him, he couldn’t…! This was his child, one of the two pieces of his whole world…!

Asmodeus took her from him with surprisingly tender motions. Then closed his eyes and muttered almost inaudibly while red magic flowed. Alec held his breath and fought with all his might to not lose control over himself when she began to whimper miserably, arms and legs moving feebly. Whatever was being done to her, it clearly hurt. Her reaction terrified him. Until something claimed all his focus.

She was breathing, steadily and easily. And while she was still far smaller than she should’ve been… She was visibly stronger.

Asmodeus opened his eyes and looked at her with an expression the archer couldn’t read. “She has such a strong spirit. So much will. She exceeds all my expectations.”

At those words Alec didn’t hold himself back any longer. He moved swiftly and snatched the child from the unresisting demon. She calmed down the instant she was in his safe arms, whimpers transforming to softer mewls. “Name your price so I can pay, and leave.”

Asmodeus smiled. “The favors thus far have been paid for in full, Shadowhunter.” The demon tilted his head, like a bloodhound catching a scent. “But I can sense that there’s another thing you want to ask for. You wish me to return what Magnus sacrificed for your parabatai.” It sounded so much like an accusation that it twisted something inside Alec.

Alec clenched his jaw. The idea of getting his fiancé his magic back… It was so alluring that it blurred his common sense. “Why would you return it to him now?”

“Because this lesson has served its purpose.” Asmodeus took a step closer to him. “All I want in return is a hug from the one my son loves enough to give away a part of his very self.” The demon opened his arms. “Do it… and prove to me that you’re worthy of his love. Prove to me that you’re willing to sacrifice for him as he is for you.”

What choice did those words, which snaked their way much deeper than they should’ve, leave him?

Slowly, his heart pounding and the remnants of his sanity screaming at him to stop, Alec placed the baby to the foot of Magnus’s bed. Then, moving stiffly, he closed the distance between himself and Asmodeus. As soon as he was close enough the Prince of Hell wrapped his arms around him. The hold wasn’t tight but nonetheless felt smothering.  
“This is my thank you, Alexander. And the price you have to pay.” Asmodeus’s hand moved. “For loving my boy.”

Moments later Alec’s howl of agony echoed in the mansion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What… did… Asmodeus… do? To all three of them? (whimpers) AND, will they all live?
> 
> SOOOO… How was that for the big climax of this story? Any good, at all? PLEASE, do let me hear from you! Comments ALWAYS make my day brighter.
> 
> NEXT UPDATE COMING NEXT MONDAY.
> 
> Until next time, folks! I REALLY hope that you’ll all join this story again there.
> 
> Take care!


	14. Toxic Connections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The full price that was paid for the lives of Magnus and the baby girl is revealed. Alec and Magnus both struggle to deal with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess what? It’s time to update! (grins)
> 
> First, though… THANK YOU, a million times over, for your absolutely amazing comments, as well as the kudos and bookmarks listings! You guys are fantastic. (HUGS)
> 
> Okay… Are you ready? Because here we go! I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride.

‘ _I will always be right here._ ’

That voice, echoing in the dark… It didn’t make any sense to Magnus. How could his father possibly be there? Was this another telepathic intrusion? Or one of his horrible nightmares?

‘ _Even after that Shadowhunter of yours inevitably lets you down, like all your past lovers… I will be right here, welcoming you home. No matter how many times you banish me and curse my name. A day will come when you accept that and return to your father’s house._ ’

Magnus groaned and tried to move his hand but it proved to be much too heavy. His head was pounding so badly that it threatened to drive him insane. “… me alone …”, he hissed, in no fit state to care if the voice of his father was imaginary or not.

“Magnus?” That… wasn’t his father. A familiar, calloused hand stroked his hair tenderly. “Are you waking up?”

“Hmm.” Magnus fought mightily to think past the pain and the fog muddling his mind. What was going on? What happened? It took frustratingly long, but finally his eyes were half open. He frowned at how pale and distraught his fiancé seemed. “… ‘s wrong?”

Alec swallowed hard, moisture shimmering in his eyes. “I… I almost lost you. Both of you.”

Finally Magnus’s head began to catch on. Terror shot through him like an icicle. The baby…!

Magnus sat up quickly, and regretted it the instant agony flared in his private parts. He cried out a second before Alec’s hand was there, helping him stay up more comfortably. “Easy, easy!” the Shadowhunter soothed. “You’re still recovering. You need to take it easy.”

Trying to catch his breath, Magnus nodded faintly. He wasn’t able to calm down, though. Because his wandering gaze couldn’t find what it was seeking.

Where was their child? Did he fail her, after all? He needed his daughter!

“Hey.” Alec kissed his cheek, and it helped ground his panicked thoughts. “She’ll be okay, I promise. Catarina’s just checking up on her.”

Magnus’s wildly jumping heart clung to those words. He hated how his eyes stung from almost spilling tears. Apparently the postpartum hormones were as volatile as the pregnancy ones… “She’s safe?” He had to be absolutely sure, because he couldn’t see her and…

“Yeah”, Alec confirmed. Heartwarmingly lovingly and patiently. “She’s safe.”

_Then why do you look like you always do when you’re trying to lie?_ Magnus didn’t get the chance to ask that. Or to spiral further into the paranoia. Because just then he felt something that made all his storming thoughts screech to a halt.

A familiar tingle under his skin. Warm, pulsating and electric. Like a second heartbeat. When he beckoned gently it answered eagerly, blue energy dancing triumphantly around his hand. Almost like it’d missed him as much as he missed it.

Magnus gasped while an overjoyed smile appeared to his lips. “My magic…” How…?

Yes, how?

Magnus’s smile fell while happiness gave way to sheer terror. Cold filled him, soon followed by rage that stemmed from memories of everything his father put him through during their time together. “You promised me…!” He started to tremble and it took all his willpower to not lose control over the magic he just regained. “Alexander, please…” He looked towards the man he loved, searching his eyes. “Please, tell me you didn’t summon him!”

“I had no other choice.” Alec’s despair helped force down some of his anger. The couple of tears that rolled were even more effective. “You… You were both dying, you and our little girl. And I… I couldn’t…” The archer shook his head frantically. “Magnus, I love you. And even if you’ll never forgive me… I couldn’t let you…” It took a couple of shuddering breaths before the young man managed to speak more. “Tell me you wouldn’t have done the same thing.”

Magnus couldn’t. Because if their roles were reversed, he would’ve been willing to sell his very soul, to give his life. Which didn’t make accepting his fiancé’s reckless act of pure love any easier. He did his best to try and sound calm when he spoke next. He ended up hissing through gritted teeth. “He could’ve hurt you! Killed you!” That was when a sickening thought rose. “What did he want as a payment?” He asked again even more sharply when the archer looked away, refusing to answer. “Alec. What was the price?”

Alec’s facial muscles twitched from how tight they were. A pair of unsteady hands moved restlessly while the Shadowhunter fought to ground himself. “My mortality.”

 

/ _The pain… It was the worst physical agony Alec had ever experienced. He howled until he ran out of breath, then gasped uselessly. Black spots danced in his line of vision. The only thing keeping him from blacking out was that Asmodeus was still around, while his family was defenseless. He couldn’t afford to crumble._

_Steeling himself, Alec gritted his teeth. Then lifted his chin to look at the Prince of Hell. “What… did you do… to me?” he hissed._

_Asmodeus smirked. “My son traded away something he was meant to be. And now you’ve sacrificed something that you were born to be.” The demon enjoyed his confusion and fast dawning fear before deciding that playtime had lasted long enough. “You are no longer mortal.”_

_Alec froze from shock and disbelief. He expected that the demon would try to take away Magnus, or their baby. Not… this. “Why… would you make me live forever?”_

_Asmodeus smiled. “Because there are several ways one can die.” The demon tilted his head. “Magnus has lived with his immortality since he was born. He’s made his peace with it, accepted it as the gift and curse it is. But you, Nephilim… You’re different. Living forever… The weight of it goes past your comprehension. Centuries of living will stretch you thin, calcify your heart.” The Prince of Hell seemed entirely too satisfied. “Also, you care too deeply for those closest to you. Your siblings… Your parabatai… Precious people you haven’t even met yet, who haven’t even been born yet… You will live to lose every single one of them. Each of those losses will carve a hole to your soul and fill it with bitter poison. Until one day you will look at my son, and you’re in so much agony that you curse the day you met him.” Cat eyes flashed. “When your love transforms to resentment and you break his heart… I will be there. Ready to welcome Magnus home.”_ /

 

Magnus remained paralyzed and muted by terror and fury.

“Magnus, please say something.” Alec sounded scared and uncertain. (And Magnus hated himself for not being in the state of mind to offer proper relief, at a time when his beloved would’ve needed it the most.) “I… I get that you’re mad at me. But…”

“I am angry”, Magnus admitted. He fixed his raging unglamoured eyes on his hands, which had fisted around a blanket so hard that his knuckles had lost all color. “A little at you, for risking yourself that way. But mainly at my father, for what he did to you.” Slowly he looked up, to meet a pair of wary but hopeful gaze. “You’re right. If our roles were reversed… I would’ve done the same thing. But, what Asmodeus did… What he cursed you with…” He trailed off when his magic spiked. Apparently his ailing physical condition meant that his control over his powers wasn’t at its best. He looked down again, overwhelmed, frustrated and ashamed. “We’ll talk about this. Properly. Not… like we sometimes handle… difficult topics.” They’d grown past awful yelling matches, hadn’t they? “But can you… Can you give me a little time alone? Because I don’t want to hurt you.” With his magic, which he’d longed so badly, or with venomous words he would’ve regretted later.

“Okay.” Apparently his attempt at trying to handle the whole thing right wasn’t working. Because defeat hung heavily on Alec when the archer got up and began to walk out of the room.

“Alexander.” Magnus did his best to smile when Alec looked towards him with cautious hope. “I love you. With or without mortality. Just like you’ve loved me with or without immortality. Nothing could make me stop.” He could only hope that the same was true for his fiancé, even after what was just done to the younger man because of him.

Alec was too stressed out and shaken to smile properly. But the Shadowhunter’s eyes softened in a way that was meant for him alone. “I love you, too.”

Magnus waited until he could be sure that he was alone. Only then he gave in and let the emotions flow. He didn’t have to scream. Magic did that for him.

His daughter almost died. He almost died. Alec made a terrible sacrifice to save them both. His father had been back, perhaps still was. His father came near him and his child. And now he had his magic back. He was supposed to figure out how to be a proper parent. He needed to help Alec deal with immortality, to figure out how to undo it if necessary. It was far too much to handle, especially with all the hormones coursing through his system.

Magnus gasped for breath while his magic shattered a nearby liquor cabinet.

Suddenly there was a voice in his head. A familiar, amused voice. ‘ _It feels good to be back, doesn’t it, my boy?_ ’

/

Iris Rouse had no idea what to do with her life when she was released from prison. Apparently after two shady Clave operations what was left of the once mighty organization wanted to appease furious Downworlders to avoid a war. The prisoners who’d been treated in a… questionable manner were released, regardless of their crimes, to keep them quiet. Iris was one of the lucky ones.

She didn’t feel lucky. She was furious, lost, helpless, defenseless and empty. She’d had her magic – her soul – torn from her. She had no idea who she was anymore.

Walking towards her home, Iris remembered how she once mocked Magnus over losing his magic. Now she wished she’d kept her mouth shut. Because apparently karma had decided to punish her.

As it turned out karma wasn’t the only thing coming to get her that late evening. She froze when she felt someone watching her. A shudder crossed her when she recognized the man who stood a couple of steps away, watching her from the shadows.

It was Asmodeus, in all his glory, just like she’d seen him in Bane’s memories.

She tried to scream for help, although there was no one around. After a shushing sound Asmodeus snapped his fingers, making it impossible for her to even breathe properly. “Listen carefully for once in your miserable life.” He went on when he had her full attention. “It has come to my attention that if it wasn’t for you, I might have two grandchildren instead of one. You kidnapped my son. You tortured him. And, if I’m not much mistaken, you murdered one of his unborn children.”

Iris swallowed. Wishing that she would’ve found the breath to beg for her life. But even while sheer terror was driving her senseless, she knew that it was too late for prayers. Greater Demons didn’t care much for prayers, anyway.

“You went through my son’s memories. Did you see what he did to his stepfather?” Asmodeus’s eyes blazed hellfire. “He burned that pathetic man right where he stood. And you’re about to experience first-hand where he got his darkest impulses from.”

Already Iris began to feel the flames consuming her.

“You tortured what is mine. You killed what was mine. And now…” Asmodeus smiled almost serenely. “You burn.”

Iris’s howls of anguish echoed long after she was nothing more than a pile of ashes.

/

Magnus froze. His chest tightened while shivers of dread shook his whole body. _Oh, god, Iris…!_ True, she was a despicable person, but he didn’t think she deserved what she just got. “Get out of my head”, he growled.

‘ _That’s quite impossible._ ’ Asmodeus certainly didn’t sound sorry. ‘ _Because you and I… Now that I got the chance to complete the process my granddaughter started, we have a special connection._ ’

“Do not… call her that”, Magnus warned in a low growl, primal protective instincts flaring.

‘ _But that’s what she is._ ’ Asmodeus sounded sickeningly parental. With how emotionally wired Magnus was, it almost sounded like genuine care. ‘ _And I am her grandfather._ ’

“What do you want from us?” Magnus snapped. Because with Asmodeus there was always something. A price to pay. An ulterior motive.

‘ _Quite simple. I want you closer. Both of you, ideally._ ’

“So you decided to get into my head and make me feel how you butcher someone?” Magnus hated it. The burn, the darkness… “Literally, this time.”

‘ _This bond wasn’t created to punish you. Its purpose is to ensure that I will always be there in your hour of need. For both of you. Iris was my way of showing what happens to those who hurt you._ ’

“Yes, and you’ve always been so good to me…”, Magnus fired back, his voice dripping with sarcasm. His eyes narrowed. “I will break this bond”, he declared heatedly. “I’m not a naïve, defenseless child anymore. You… will never get a hold of me again. I’ll banish you from my head.”

‘ _Best of luck with that. Because I am the only one who can break our bond. If you want it gone… you will have to come to me._ ’ 

/

In the meantime Alec told Catarina a part of Asmodeus’s price he couldn’t bring himself to share with Magnus yet. He had his arms wrapped around himself while he watched the baby, who whimpered softly under Catarina’s magic. “Please tell me he was lying. Or that you can do something about it”, he begged.

Catarina sighed heavily. “Alec, I… I’m so sorry. I wish I could. But the spell Asmodeus used… I can feel it wrapped around her heart, keeping it going.” She looked at him with apologetic eyes. “She’d die if I tried to meddle with it.”

Alec buried his face in his hands. Too much, too much, all of this…! “So… You’re telling me that I need Asmodeus to keep my daughter alive?”

 

/ _Alec’s eyes narrowed. He wondered how bad of an idea it would’ve been to punch the Prince of Hell. “I will never break Magnus’s heart”, he hissed. Apparently not even by dying anymore._

_“Oh, but one day you will. Not that whether you will or not would make much difference, because Magnus is bound to return to Edom one day, anyway.” Asmodeus’s cat eyes flashed. “Do you know why I’m not trying to take my granddaughter along now? Because when she’s old enough to be of use to me, you’ll bring her to me. To save her life.”_

_Alec froze at Asmodeus’s words. That had to be some kind of a trick, a lie…! “What are you talking about?”_

_Asmodeus tilted his head. “By the time I got to my granddaughter, she was essentially dead. And her heart… It had no hope of lasting a single beat more. The magic I used to bring her back, to ensure her survival… It’s the demonic kind. So powerful that if I used enough of it to fix her heart permanently now, she would’ve perished.”_

_Alec’s eyes filled with tears. He couldn’t stop it, not even with his current audience. “No…!”_

_“She has to be strong and mature enough, preferably at least fifteen, before the spell is renewed. Hopefully she’ll be strong enough to survive it before that time comes. I’d rather not risk her life by doing it too soon. Also, for the renewal you have to bring her to Edom. Only there I’m strong enough to make it permanent.” Asmodeus smirked. “And you will leave her there.”_

_Alec’s disbelief was quick to transform into rage. “What? I will never…!”_

_“You’ll have no other choice.” Asmodeus seemed disgustingly satisfied with himself. “Already before she was conceived, I ensured that she’d feel an eternal pull towards Edom. It’ll grow stronger as she ages, as her powers grow. And by the time you bring her to me… She’d rather kill you than leave. And do you honestly imagine that Magnus wouldn't join her there immediately?” The man shrugged. "One way or another, you've already lost them. Because you don't belong where they do."_

_“I’ll kill you for this”, Alec hissed, a traitorous tear rolling._

_Asmodeus snorted, unimpressed. “Even if you by some miracle were able to do that… I wouldn’t recommend it. Because like it or not, I’m your daughter’s only hope of living past her teenage years.” The demon created a portal, nauseatingly pleased when he saw that his work was done. For now. “You have a few years to make up your mind, Shadowhunter. Will you rather let her die before she’s had the time to truly live? Or will you give her up when the time comes, to stay alive with me?” With that the Prince of Hell was gone._ /

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooooh, boy… Asmodeus SERIOUSLY puts a price tag on everything. He’s rooted himself deep into the life of the Lightwood-Bane family, now. (gulps)
> 
> SOOO… How was that? PLEASE, do let me hear from you! It ALWAYS makes my day.
> 
> Until the next and (for now) last time! I really hope that I’ll see you all there.
> 
> Take care!


	15. Hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus struggle to deal with everything that’s happened and been revealed. As it turns out they won’t have to handle it all alone. In the middle of the emotional turmoil they choose a name for their daughter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought that this would be a short chapter. I thought wrong. (chuckles) BUT, here we are, ready to see how this concludes.
> 
> THANK YOU, from the bottom of my heart, for your AMAZING comments, love and support! You have no idea how much they mean to me. (HUGS)
> 
> By the way... I’m sort of flattered by your reactions to the previous chapter’s twist! It was something I’d been aiming towards from the start and I was afraid I’d give away everything too soon. I’m, admittedly, a little giddy to have caught you off guard. (smirks)
> 
> Awkay... Are you ready? Let’s go! I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride.

Magnus didn’t want to fall asleep. He had Asmodeus in his head, he needed to see his daughter and he wanted to have a proper talk with Alec about… everything. But he was drained and in need of a lot of recovery, emotionally and physically. At some point it all knocked him out.

Magnus woke up to whimpers and muttering. “… come on … just a little …” What was Alec doing?

Always too curious for his own good, Magnus forced his eyes to open. To meet a sight he wouldn’t forget, no matter how long he’d live. This time it was a good memory.

Alec sat on the other side of the bed, with their baby in his safe arms. Apparently the archer was trying to feed her from a bottle. And she wasn’t interested. The daddy and daughter had identical frowns of concentration and stubbornness on their faces.

It was definitely one of the most adorable things Magnus had ever seen. Something he wouldn’t have minded staring at for hours on end. A smile found its way to his lips without coaxing. “Can I try?”

Alec shuddered lightly from startle, gaze flying up immediately to meet his. “I’m sorry! We weren’t supposed to wake you up.” As if to argue, the baby began to whimper far more loudly.

Magnus chuckled. “Perhaps you didn’t want me awake, but she did. Let’s see if I can get her to calm down.”

Magnus’s heart hammered mercilessly. Perhaps he was hundreds of years old, but his experience on babies was… limited, at best. And this one was particularly precious to him. What if he’d hurt her accidentally? What if he…?

Then his daughter was in his arms and all Magnus’s jumping thoughts came to a screeching halt. Because there she was, snuggled against him, and she fit there like she belonged there. The baby seemed to agree, because she emitted a tiny sound of delight.

“I guess she needed to feel that you’re okay”, Alec suggested softly.

The thought made a thud go through Magnus. Apparently he wasn’t the only one who’d felt restless during the forced separation. “Can you…” He coughed once when his voice cracked. “Can you give me the bottle? So I can try?”

Alec complied instantly. Magnus wasn’t exactly proud of how unsteady his hand was when he took a deep breath, then made his attempt. What if he’d do it all wrong? What if she wouldn’t feel comfortable with him feeding her?

At first the child didn’t seem to quite realize what was expected of her. “Go on”, Magnus murmured tenderly, barely audibly. His voice rumbled inside the chest she was pressed against. “You must be hungry, sweetheart. Go on.”

Encouraged, she took the first experimental taste. Gaining more confidence when she was successful, she tried again. Eventually she grabbed the bottle demandingly with both hands.

Alec chuckled breathily. “You’re a natural. Why am I not surprised?”

Magnus wanted to snort back that he didn’t actually have any idea what he was doing. All he knew was that she felt even more fragile than when she was safe inside him. And he was scared out of his mind. As well as so happy that it made him paranoid. Nothing good ever lasted long for him…

A companionable silence lingered while the child ate what little her stomach needed. Once she was done she swatted the bottle away and mewed so loudly that it surprised both adults. Her flailing arms announced that she wanted something.

“Do you want to give burping her a try?” Alec offered. (Oh yes, that part of the baby book was coming back to the warlock, now.) Seeing his hesitation and apprehension, the archer went on. “I can show you how it’s done, if you want me to. I saw mom do it with Max. She even let me try a bunch of times.”

Magnus nodded very slowly. He wasn’t sure he was ready, but he’d have to give it a shot sooner or later. With loving hands Alec placed a small towel on his shoulder, then guided him and their daughter until she was positioned perfectly. It took a little longer than they’d expected before she was done. Immediately after she wiggled and grabbed a firm hold on Magnus. Latching onto him with the same fiery determination with which she’d latched onto life since she was conceived.

Magnus chuckled under his breath. “Yes, sweetheart. You’re definitely taking after your parents when it comes to stubbornness.” He groaned. “We’re going to be in so much trouble when she becomes a teenager.” He meant it as a joke. There was no reply. Growing alarmed, he lifted his gaze. What he found… certainly wasn’t what he’d expected.

Alec stared at the two of them with unshed tears in his eyes. The archer’s whole body was shaking and almost all color had left his face. The Shadowhunter looked like he was afraid that they’d vanish if he so much as blinked.

Magnus was officially worried. His brows furrowed. “Alexander, what’s wrong?”

Alec swallowed loudly. “There’s… There’s something you need to know, and I… I have no idea how to tell you.”

/

Moments later Catarina was coming to check up on the family. She froze just outside the doorway. Her heart ached at what was happening inside.

The baby slept, blissfully unaware of the pain and drama around her. Alec had buried his face into both hands and his visibly tense muscles spoke clearly of how much he was hurting. Magnus sat paralyzed, his face alarmingly colorless and his lips open for pleas that refused to come. His dark eyes, which stared at nothing in particular, were full of agony, shock, rage and betrayal. Her best friend’s entire body shook and there was no telling what he would’ve done if he wasn’t holding his daughter. So Alec had revealed the rest of the deal...

It was a nightmare that refused to end, and the injustice of it all made Catarina want to scream.

She wiped her eyes upon hearing steps. Glancing over her shoulder, she found Simon and Izzy, the latter of whom was carrying a bouquet of flowers. “We… heard that both Magnus and the baby are doing better, so we thought…” The vampire’s confused eyes went from the room to her.

It was Izzy who spoke up. Uncharacteristically open fear in her voice. “What’s going on?”

Catarina sighed heavily. Well, she did have Alec’s permission to share the bleak news with the others… “Let’s give them some privacy. Can you call the others to that living room downstairs?” She didn’t think she’d be able to tell all this twice.

/

Everything was still and quiet for so long that Alec got used to it. So he jumped a little when Magnus placed the baby on the bed, gently and carefully. Then began to struggle to his feet. “Hey, you shouldn’t…!”

“Alec, don’t…” Magnus shook his head, back turned towards him. The smaller man’s whole frame was shaking. “Just… Let me, please…!”

Alec nodded, speechless. There was fairly little he would’ve denied his fiancé at that very moment. Knowing all too well how much the recent revelation hurt.

With a visible amount of effort Magnus made his way to the room’s toilet and closed the door. It was incredibly hard to let him go, to let him revert back to his habit of suffering alone. But Alec knew that it was something he needed. At least for a moment.

A terrifyingly loud crash was his cue to step in.

His heart jumping, Alec made sure their little one was safely on the bed before dashing to the bathroom. It was in shambles. In the middle of it all sat Magnus, gasping for air and tears running down his cheeks. Magic still crackled around the warlock’s hands, ready to lash out some more.

Most people might’ve shied away from it. But not Alec, because he knew that it wouldn’t hurt him. Moving slowly and calmly to avoid distressing his fiancé further, he made his way closer. Until he was able to sit down as well and wrap his arms around Magnus.

The moments for which Magnus tensed up were painfully long. Until the older man practically melted to his embrace and clung to him so tightly that it almost hurt. Alec held back as firmly as he dared to.

For a while they just sat there, the sheer injustice of it all having struck them to the floor. Clinging to each other for comfort, just like they did after finding out that Iris killed their other, unborn child. The suddenly dawning parallel stung badly enough to make Alec break down to tears of his own. 

He wasn’t sure which one was worse, didn’t want to even try to compare. To lose something precious before knowing he’d had it. Or to lose something precious as a payment for saving it.

/

Robert Lightwood was exhausted. A shady project of the Clave had just been shut down and a lot of people had been arrested. The High Warlock of Brooklyn was dead. And he had to explain it away without revealing that thanks to his son, the head of the Institute, the Prince of Hell stopped by. (Some day soon he’d attempt to wrap his head around the fact that his son-in-law was… what, a Downworld royalty.) At least, with Catarina’s help, he’d managed to confirm that Asmodeus had returned to Edom. The paperwork nightmare was nonetheless terrible.

Before leaving Lorenzo’s mansion he wanted to see Alec. He needed to make sure that his son was alright after… everything. Instead of the archer he ran into something else.  
The rest of the group was gathered to one of the massive building’s biggest rooms. More than one of them had tears in their eyes. Every single one of them appeared distraught.

Robert knew that they didn’t quite trust him, he hadn’t deserved it yet. But he needed to know, even though he dreaded the answer. “Did something happen to Magnus or the baby?”

/

Magnus didn’t utter a word after his breakdown. Full of new anxiety, Alec ensured that the man he loved was physically alright, then helped him back to the bed. As soon as he was sitting there safely Magnus picked up their daughter and held her to his chest, each movement full of an aching amount of love.

It took almost twenty minutes before Magnus was ready to put his thoughts into words. “She may need him. But when she no longer does… I’ll make him pay for this.” The warlock swallowed thickly, most of the rage giving way to sorrow. “That darkness my father inserted to our daughter… That pull to Edom… They’re something I’ve been fighting to resist since I was born. They’ll never go away fully, they’ll always be a part of me. But… I’ve learned to live with them. Perhaps I can help her handle and control those dark impulses, too.”

Alec opened his mouth but it turned out he was speechless.

Magnus went on after gathering himself for a moment. “What my father almost transformed me into during my time in Edom…” The warlock’s facial muscles twitched from how tight they became at the awful memories. “I’ll do everything I can to help her avoid it. Because I’d rather die than let him do to her what he failed to do to me.” The older man looked at him almost desperately. “Alexander, I’m not letting him take us away from you. We have… what, fifteen years. We’ll figure out something in that time. It’s enough. It has to be enough. Because…” Magnus shook his head, clenching his jaw. “Because I’m not giving our daughter to that monster. I won’t.”

Alec nodded, letting the other’s fire and fight fill him as well. “We’re not giving up on her. Ever.”

Alec placed a supportive hand on Magnus’s shoulder. The gesture was rewarded with a tender kiss on his knuckles. Knowing that they weren’t alone in the seemingly impossible fight was a great deal of comfort.

Silence lingered between them again while Magnus looked at the baby in his arms with teary eyes. Alec was so deep in thought that he was caught off guard when his fiancé spoke quietly. “I… don’t know what the future holds.” Was Magnus talking to him or the child? “Right now… I don’t know much of anything. And when we get to know each other a little better you’ll know how much not knowing irks me. But… I do know one thing.” Magnus breathed in deep. “Your daddy and I… We’ll never stop fighting for you. Because we loved you more than you’ll ever know before you were even born. And we love you even more now.”

The baby sighed happily and stretched, grabbing one of Magnus’s fingers to a determined hold. She was still very tiny and feeble, but the message was clear. She wasn’t giving up, either.

And just like her daddy, she seemed to have a habit of surprising people. Because there, in her papa’s arms and under her parents’ protective, adoring gazes, she opened her eyes for the first time. To reveal breathtakingly beautiful, golden cat eyes.

Moisture filled Alec’s eyes. He blamed it on stress and fatigue. “Magnus…!” he gasped in wonder.

Magnus chuckled breathlessly. “I know.” The way the warlock looked at their child… It was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

Their daughter gave them both a long, thoughtful look. Then, as though coming to some sort of a decision, she yawned serenely and closed her eyes. Her hold on Magnus’s finger tightened still while she fell asleep.

Magnus found his voice first, even if it was light as a whisper. “Remember all those baby-names we’ve been tossing around? I think I’ve finally decided which one is my favorite.” Their gazes met. “How about Danya? It…” Magnus cleared his throat and looked down for a moment. Clearly embarrassed over being so hormonal and emotional, even when he had every right to be. “It means ‘hope’.”

Alec didn’t even try to resist the temptation to kiss Magnus’s cheek. He wasn’t sure which one’s tears he tasted. “It’s perfect”, he managed hoarsely.

They exchanged a kiss they’d both needed desperately. One of love, devotion, desperation, determination, heartache and healing. The words they breathed out against each other’s lips upon parting were the truest they’d ever spoken.

“… should go …” For two new parents who were on a sensory overload due to their protective instincts Simon’s whispered words were unnaturally loud. “… interrupting something …”

Annoyed and amused simultaneously, they looked towards the room’s doorway to find the whole gang gathered there. (Magnus had the presence of mind to magic his makeup to perfection before letting them see him. He had no desire to be seen as vulnerable as he actually felt.) “Consider it interrupted, so just get in here”, Alec scoffed. More softly than he’d intended.

The others needed no further command. Jace, Clary, Izzy and Simon burst inside, some of them more hesitantly than others, all of them staring at the newborn. The attention made Magnus tense up, which in turn made the Shadowhunter stiffen, but their shoulders pressed together helped ground them.

Catarina followed soon with a long-suffering sigh. (Her presence clearly helped Magnus calm down a little more.) “I did tell them to not overwhelm you. But you know how well they listen.”

It seemed Danya was curious to find out who were making all the fuss. With a pout that reminded Alec embarrassingly of his own the baby opened her eyes. Which were still fiercely golden.

That, if it was actually possible, made Magnus tense up further. Alec understood painfully well. Most of the people in the room had never seen his beloved’s warlock mark. And although they were all friends letting them see something so private wasn’t an easy step. Not for the first time Alec wondered, with an aching heart, how many of the people Magnus had trusted with one of the most stunning bits about himself hurt him for doing so. And this time it was his daughter facing the possible judgement.

Her audience was, however, awestruck. Jace emitted a hoarse laugh, his eyes moist. Clary gasped and smiled, her eyes shimmering as well. “She’s beautiful”, the redhead whispered.

Simon practically beamed. “Magnus, she’s got your hair and lips!” He was sensitive enough to not mention the eyes. Alec wondered if a day might come when they could more than tolerate each other.

Izzy wiped her eyes, smiling brightly. “Welcome to the world, little one.” Her greeting made the child emit something that sounded like a squeal. She’d very obviously chosen her favorite of her aunts and uncles.

Magnus snorted fondly. “Such a charmer, aren’t you, sweetheart? Not even able to speak yet and already having everyone wrapped around your little finger.”

Alec rolled his eyes. Then, deciding to ignore their company, kissed Magnus’s cheek. “Half of her is from you. Are you honestly surprised?”

Magnus smirked. The genuine happiness made Alec powerless to resist a smile of his own. (Perhaps they’d make it through all this, after all, somehow.) “Well, I’ve been told that I’m charming.”

For a few more stolen minutes they lingered in the bliss of not thinking about the future. Until Clary grew far more serious. “Catarina… told us about the spell, and… I think I came up with something that may help.” She went on at Alec’s sharp nod. “It’s a rune, to block her heart from the spell’s and Asmodeus’s darkness. I’m not sure if it’s strong enough and how long it’ll hold, but… It’s something.”

Honestly? Right there Alec was willing to welcome anything that might help. But he was still cautious. “It won’t break the spell, right?” Because as poisonous as it was, it kept Danya alive.

Clary shook her head. “No, I’ll make sure of it.” She gave the parents a hesitant look. “Can I?”

They both nodded. And Alec remembered how deeply he distrusted her, even resented her, for a while. Now he was trusting her with his daughter. Under different circumstances the dramatic change might’ve amused him.

Alec held his breath while Clary got to work and Magnus was rigid against him. Clary did her very best to be gentle. But drawing a rune was never entirely painless. Danya whimpered miserably and only Magnus’s hold kept her from ruining the process with moving around. After what felt like a lifetime but actually took less than a minute the rune was complete. It was heart-shaped and actually very beautiful. Located on Danya’s chest, right above a stubborn beat of life that’d almost disappeared.

“Thank you, Biscuit”, Magnus whispered, and Alec could feel how hard he tried to hold back tears.

Danya seemed to appreciate her efforts, too. However the rune felt, she seemed to like it. She was too young to smile but her features softened. And then, without any warning, her eyes changed from golden to dark before she yawned and went to sleep. Like she hadn’t just done something remarkable, something impossible.

“She… Did she…? Was that glamour?” Simon sputtered, eyes wide. “She’s… I mean, she shouldn’t be able to do… that yet, right?”

“Only just born, and already defying expectations”, Magnus mused, not even trying to conceal his pride.

Alec smiled. He thought about his own journey from an angry and hurting, closeted boy to a man who was perfectly at peace with who and what he was. He was also madly in love and engaged to be married to another man. A warlock, no less. “Seems to run in the family”, he quipped.

“Alec!” Izzy exclaimed. Her tone dripped with mocked shock. “Was that a joke?”

/

In the middle of the affectionate banter that followed, basking in all the love around him, Magnus felt a ghost-like presence in his mind. For once it didn’t bother him. He wanted this all to radiate to his father. He wanted Asmodeus to experience every… single… bit of this.

This was the life he built for himself after escaping a life in a literal hell. This was the family he found. (Or the family that found him, whichever way one wanted to look at it.) This was the love he found.

_Do you feel this, father?_ His eyes flashed, not quite turning golden although it came close. _I will never, ever give up on this. This is where I belong, and where my daughter belongs. Try to rob this from me... and I will destroy you._

‘ _Such dark words, from someone who considers me a monster for my way of thinking._ ’

_That’s something you’ve never quite figured out. This isn’t darkness._ He tightened the hand that wasn’t holding Danya around Alec’s. _This is love._

‘ _How mundane._ ’

_Is that supposed to be an insult? Because my mother was a mundane. And whatever good there is in me, I got from her._

Magnus still wasn’t convinced that he’d be any good as a parent. But he vowed to himself that he’d try. To raise Danya right, to save her. Because he wanted to be his mother’s son. And wherever she was, he wanted her to finally stop seeing him as a monster. He even entertained a wish of making her proud.

/

In the meantime Alec lifted his gaze when he felt someone watching him. He blinked twice upon discovering his parents, civil while standing next to each other for the first time since their divorce. The way they looked at him took his breath away.

He remembered how terrified he was of coming out. And how much it hurt to be proven right in the aftermath of his failed wedding. Before the wedding his mother told him how proud she was of him and he wondered, back then, if she’d ever be proud of him again. If his parents would ever look at him the same way again.

What he faced now was pure, unconditional pride and support.

Alec had so much on his plate at the moment. He almost lost both loves of his life. He might still end up losing them, years from now, and that made it all unbearable. He was immortal and had absolutely no idea how to handle it. Or if he’d be able to actually learn to handle it. It was far too much on his buzzing, aching head.

But then Magnus gave Danya to him. And for once in his life that was promising to be a very long one Alec stopped overthinking. He clung to the here and now with all his might, because it was so good that he never, ever wanted to let it go.

He was in a room full of love and acceptance. In his arms he had a man who was his world and a daughter he’d give up anything for. He didn’t know what’d happen tomorrow, in fifteen years, or in a hundred years. Just that it’d be a battle to keep their little family from being torn apart.

But he did know that he and Magnus wouldn’t face any of it alone. The good, the bad, the amazing or the awful. It was enough to fill his aching heart with uncharacteristic optimism.

They had hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, those darlings...! They’ve got SO MUCH to try and handle right now. (sighs) Thank gosh they have each other! AND their support-net of friends and family.
> 
> Soooo... How was that? Any good, at all? PLEASE, do let me hear from you! Hearing from you ALWAYS brightens my day.
> 
> THIS STORY WILL DEFINITELY GET A SEQUEL! So, if you want to read more, stay tuned. (It shouldn’t take even a month before it’ll see daylight.)
> 
> THANK YOU, so much, for reading this! Who knows. Maybe I’ll see you around again?
> 
> Tae care!


	16. SEQUEL PROMO / SNEAK PEEK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yes, this insane journey continues!

#### To the friends of this story... Good news! I've decided to honor the final episodes of our beloved series by starting the sequel of this story as soon as this Thursday, May 9th. And not only that, this story will transform into a trilogy!

##### PART 2 - Asmodeus's Legacy

Over the course of thirteen chapters, we explore two dramatic, life-altering years in the life of the Lightwood-Bane family. We get to see how Alec and Magnus coped with Danya's first year, as well as Alec's new immortality. Somehow it's possible that things get even more hectic when Danya is five and two pieces of shocking news spin their worlds around. 

In two timelines the family faces challenges from parenting and postpartum depression to death and new, budding life. Through all the pain, stress, sorrow and drama, will they grow stronger? Or will they fall apart?

##### To honor the series's legacy, three sneak peeks.

Alec turned his gaze towards Magnus upon sensing a stare. The look on the older man's face did funny things to several parts of him. “What?”

Magnus shook his head, eyes softening. “You continue to surprise me.” One of the warlock’s eyebrows arched elegantly. “I can’t believe how calm you are.”

Alec couldn’t help it. He burst to a laugh. “Do you seriously imagine that I’m calm? This is my fifth attempt at changing her diaper.” 

/

When's Alec's eyes fluttered open he frowned, not quite understanding how he ended up to his daughter’s room. It changed to a smile when he felt a tiny body climbing to the bed. “Morning, daddy”, Danya greeted him.

Alec kissed her hair while she glued herself to his side like an octopus. “Good morning to you, too, Dany”, he murmured softly. “Did I fall asleep in the middle of a bedtime story again?” Coming back home so tired that he couldn’t even complete a damned bedtime story was among the things he hated about being the head of the Institute.

“Yeah. But it’s okay.” Danya’s genuine understanding and forgiveness tugged at something inside him fiercely. “Papa sneaked in and read the rest of it. Then he showed me how to make a nightlight, so you wouldn’t have bad dreams.” There was a proud, excited smile on her face and her dark, glamoured eyes shone. "Did it work?"

/

“Any other symptoms?”

“Dizziness… Headaches…” Magnus’s jawline tightened when emotions threatened to get the best of him. “Just like…”

“… the previous time.” The wonder and worry in Catarina’s voice gave away what she’d found long before words. “Oh, Magnus… There’s definitely a beat in there."

#### 'Asmodeus's Legacy' - Starting on May 9th

ps: Comments for chapter 15 will be responded to right before or after the first chapter of the sequel is out.

**Author's Note:**

> Poor Magnus and Alec…! Such a shock. And to lose one little one on top of that! (whimpers)
> 
> SOOO… Whadda you think? Too weird? Good? Bad? Bland? PLEASE, do let me know! I ALWAYS love hearing from you.
> 
> In any case, thank you so much for reading! Whoever knows. Maybe I’ll see you again?
> 
> Take care!


End file.
